


Run Me Like a River

by cecylia



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alpha Dean, Alpha Michael, Alpha Sam, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Office, Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Eventual Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Omega Castiel, Omega Jess, One Night Stands, Power Bottom Castiel, Sorry Not Sorry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-28
Updated: 2017-01-23
Packaged: 2018-07-10 20:17:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 43,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7004863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cecylia/pseuds/cecylia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel Novak is a peculiar Omega. Unlike the rest, he’s taller, stronger, faster, and knows how to stand up for himself against stubborn Alphas that want to cross the line with him. He moved to a different city in the hope to forget his past and maybe, be able to start fresh and find someone to give him the love he’s in desperate need of. He’s a desirable mystery to the men and women of his new workplace, since he purposely keeps his Omega rank a secret with suppressants, until one day he forgets them and goes into an immediate heat that catches the attention of Dean Winchester, an Alpha who’s had his eyes on him for a while.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> New fic! And it's not the Vamp! Dean I promised, but holy shit, that story is going through some development hell. Like, it's coming off nicely, but the planning is torturous... I'll try to update that soon and hopefully a new chapter for my old stories. Please tell me what you think about this new one...I'm going to put you guys through a serious ride hahah.

 

**Chapter One**

Castiel’s first week at his new workplace was definitely different.

It was nice to be able to walk down the crowded hallways to his cubicle, without having every Alpha turn his way to smell him. Those suppressants his brother Inias recommended were actually working perfectly for his situation.

As an Omega, it was difficult to move anywhere without having some pervert try to get into his pants, or nosy women judging him for not having a mate. He’d become used to it though, but the change the medicine brought was ultimately better for his sake.

The only thing he didn’t appreciate was having strangers all over his business, wondering his classification because it was hard to identify him with a physique like his.

Unlike most Omegas, Castiel was tall, built, and capable of standing up for himself against cocky Alphas that thought the world revolved around them. Not that he was criticizing other Omegas for wanting to be the perfect, submissive, partner to their lovers, but he didn’t appreciate every single one of them making it their dream to live up to the stereotype.

Of course, looking the way he did, came with a price, and that was because he attracted more attention than he expected. With time passing, Alphas craved something different, especially the women. Male Alphas stuck to their petite, small-framed Omegas, but all of them somehow developed a kink for someone as different as himself. Alphas women wanted someone who would look as strong as them, and went for the Betas, which became boring after a while. So when Cas became one of the few cases where he was sturdier than ninety-nine of the Omega population, he had Alphas and Betas throwing themselves at him left and right.

Now that he thought about it, nothing really changed, actually. He still had nosy Betas and Omegas trying to get all over him in the hopes that he would give in and admit that he was one of them. Alphas kept their distance, they had better things to do than trying to figure out if he was their type.

Except for one of them.

There was one called Dean Winchester that liked to stare at him whenever he entered their floor. He was a supervisor, the CEO’s right hand, and an Alpha. He was undoubtedly handsome with sandy hair and bright, green eyes, striking in every way an Alpha could ever be granted. That lucky bastard.

They never spoke, only passed by each other when Cas tried to get to the copy room and he stood by the door. His stare devoured him, those green orbs preying on him like a lion did to a defenseless gazelle, but he stood still, preferring to creepily watch him as Castiel made copies of Monday’s financial report.

Cas knew what he was trying to do. Every Alpha in the office attempted to at least once since his first step into the building. He wanted to know what Castiel was, to see if he should make a move. Luckily for him, the medication kept his scent hidden and his heats controlled so the only way anyone could figure it out, was if Castiel said something.

He never wanted for anyone to know about him or where he came from, he was happy to keep his profile hidden because it meant peace with the people around him. The laws changed, discrimination dropped, and slowly, people cared less but there was always someone who did and if they figured out his story, they would pin it on him for being an Omega that looked like a Beta with hints of Alpha.

But for now, he could only settle for his miniature office, the people that were next to him, and making sure he never forgot the suppressants. So far, he only got two of those down. His medicine was inside his lunch bag and his office was less messy than ever.

His colleagues were not the greatest that day. They talked, complained, occasionally looked over to his desk and speak about him as if Castiel couldn’t hear them.

It was easy to ignore them at first, but their gossiping got louder that Cas couldn’t help himself from listening in.

Apparently there was an upcoming office party happening that weekend and they were thinking about approaching Cas to invite him, but all the Omega women present were shy to take a step and the Betas too worried about getting a glare out of him.

Cas tried not to give it much though, but then a red haired, Beta girl named Charlie, neared him confidently with a paper in her hand. “Hey there, hot-shot.”

Castiel didn’t raise his eyes from his laptop, too concentrated in typing sixty words per minute and get that day’s report done so that he could leave early. “Can I help you?”

“Would you be interested in coming to the office party this Saturday? It’s sort of a retirement present for old Zachariah, but it also serves as an excuse to get drunk in the office and get away with it.” She placed the paper on top of his keyboard, completely distracting him from his work.

Annoyed at her action, he rolled his eyes, “You couldn’t give it to me after work?”

“Well, we’re handing them out now, so might as well, right?” She paused, letting her presence settle around an irritated Castiel, “It’d be cool if you showed up.”

He took the paper, scanning the poorly placed graphics, thinking of possible lies to tell Charlie so that she could go away, “I’m busy this weekend, actually.”

She hummed thoughtfully, clearly not buying his justification, “Invitation’s still open, Castiel. A lot of coworkers want to see you there to get to know you.”

“No, they just want to know if I’m a Giver or a Receiver or both. Nice try covering it up, by the way, I almost bought it. But if you desperately want to see me there, I’ll squeeze it into my schedule and see if maybe, I can make some time for it.” He forced a smile, looking Charlie in the eye as he folded the paper and placed it inside his trash can.

Charlie squinted at him, “You’re a curious case, Novak.”

“I’ve been told.”

She ignored everything he said and continued, “Should I write you down as a Yes for the party? Meg is bringing the food and she wants to make sure there’s enough.”

“Write me down as a Maybe.” Because deep down, as cool as he wanted to seem to the red head, he did kind of want to go to the party. He was lonely guy that didn’t know many people, so this could’ve served him for that. “I can’t guarantee anything, but I’ll try to go.” He would be late, but he would totally be there.

“If you do come, make sure to carry the invitation with you, we don’t want anybody that doesn’t belong there.” She pointed at the folded paper he threw away, “I hope to see you there, Castiel.”

He didn’t respond and watched her go back to her group of friends, nodding at a petite, brunette Omega that couldn’t stop sending heart eyes his way. She was cute and all, but he had never been interested in dating omegas like himself. He had a weak spot for submissive Alphas, particularly if they were male, that absolutely loved it when he took control.

At least he had something to look forward to that weekend. Ever since his move two weeks ago, the days had been eventless. He spent most of his afternoons thinking about the life he left behind and new one he could create if anyone was up for it. Although he was accustomed to failure in the Mate department, a gleam of optimism always reached him moments before he gave up.

Times were rough for him since he left Pontiac years ago, even rougher with the constant moving of cities that followed, and he wanted to make the most of it now that he was free and finally at peace, but, with obvious flaws like the ones his body was exposed to, it was challenging to find someone who was willing to overlook them.

For a moment, he had been with someone who did, and loved him dearly, and it suddenly came to an end. He knew why, and instead of confronting the problem, Cas did what he was best at and ran away to yet another location.

Bellevue was unique in its own way, very welcoming of single Omegas like him, which was a little odd since he was used to getting dirty looks from bitter, old Betas and Alphas that were stuck on the idea that his kind couldn’t live by himself.

He was interrupted again when an Omega male peeked into his cubicle. “Are you gonna go, Cassie?”

Castiel cringed at the horrendous nickname, but still answered, “Uh, I’m considering it. Are you?” He wanted to say his name but he could barely remember it.

The man, whose hair was caramel colored and set back, smiled teasingly, “I’d love to see you there.” Oh no. “You’ve been on everyone’s mouth, all of them wanting to know what you are exactly.”

“Why does it matter?” That’s why, he still didn’t make friends.

“Pretty face like yours walks into the office one Tuesday morning with no scent and a body to kill for, does make some head turns. You’re pretty secretive about what you are. I wonder why.” His devious smile turned into a grin that Castiel was tempted to punch off.

“There’s plenty of people here who look like me, I don’t understand how I’m so special.”

“Like I said, you’re scentless. You don’t give off any Alpha, Beta, Omega vibes whatsoever. You don’t talk to many people either and take some unknown pills. Truly, you’re a case to die for.”

He rolled his eyes and wished he could simply stand up and yell out to the whole office that he was a goddamn omega, but that would mean going back to the old customs he tried so hard to avoid. “Why don’t you mind your own damn business. What I am shouldn’t matter.” He paused, “I’m sorry but what’s your name? It’s just that I’ve had this conversation so many times with people like you, that it’s hard to keep up with names.”

The man stretched his hand as if Castiel wanted to take it, “Gabriel Angelo. Mated Omega.” He undid his tie to be able to pull down his shirt’s collar and reveal the mate mark by his neck. The sight of something he had too many unfortunate memories of, made his body ache, especially the mating mark _he_ had and kept hidden on his neck.

“Um,” He mumbled uncomfortably, rubbing his neck to make the chills disappear, but the pure acknowledgement he gave the burden on his skin made it worse, “That’s nice, I guess.”

“Jeez, man, you okay? You look a little spooked.” Gabriel asked, treating it as a joke, but if only he knew that Castiel’s sudden discomfort was anything but.

“I’m fine.” He assured, but the sinking feeling remained. Castiel felt that sickening sensation pushing him around like a bully as he tried to avoid recalling his awful memories of Pontiac. He’d been fine about it before, saw mating marks all over place, but something about Gabriel’s threw him over the edge. Perhaps the sudden exposure.

Cas was certain that Gabriel was a good man and his mate too, but he was disgusted when he saw that bite on his skin, it brought back the baggage he thought he was done with. Boy, was he wrong.

“You sure?” He sensed the care in Gabriel’s words, but he wasn’t in a good place to take them into consideration.

He smiled, “Yeah, thank you.” Cas sighed, placing a hand over his stirred stomach, “Unlike you, I’m not mated.”

If he had an Alpha, he’d use them for comfort, he’d cuddle into their arms, take in their scent in the hope that he would feel better immediately and make his trauma go away. But he was alone, and facing the truth about it hurt. Nobody wanted a dirtied Omega like him. Even if they did, they would only disappoint him and leave.

The voice of the man who changed him replayed in his head to serve as a haunting reminder of his reality. He might’ve run away from his problems, but there was no place that could ever hide him from the one that turned him into a walking chaos.


	2. Chapter 2

** **

 

** **

 

 

**Chapter Two**

Fourteen. 

Cas had fourteen mate marks on his body. Ten above the waist, and four below it, all varying in location. They were made by the same godforsaken monster his parents threw him at, never caring about what may happen because they were too ashamed to have an Omega as a son in a family full of Alphas and Betas. 

Because of it, it was hard to look at himself in the mirror now. He couldn’t do so without thinking about the horrific nights he spent by his side.

Gladly, he moved on. Sure, his life wasn’t perfect after that and he lost a lot of riches on the way, but anything was better than spending another day with the Alpha he was forced to once call mate. 

The bite scars were easy to hide from other people using make up and scarves, but it wasn’t simple pretending that they weren’t there. He couldn’t shower or get dressed without having to acknowledge their presence or the thoughts of the Alpha who made them.

They were his cargo; one he could never get rid of. 

He reached for the foundation, thinking about how he needed a new bottle as he applied some on his fingertips. It didn’t get the job done all the way, the outline of the scars was partly visible, but it was enough to fool the eye, especially when the collar of his shirt would be covering it. 

It took him about fifteen minutes to prepare himself for work, making sure everything was in place. His left wrist was covered by a leather bracelet, since he also had another mark there, his tie and shirt were well-adjusted, his hair neatly combed, and his trench coat in his hand, all of it ready for him to set out the door. He was already five minutes late. 

 He’d forgotten to charge his phone throughout the night, so he had no alarm to wake him that morning. Cas still woke up early though, but it cost him the thirty minutes he used for breakfast. 

Castiel rushed out of his apartment, trying not to trip on the hallway, and passing by a cute, tall Alpha that was picking up his newspaper. He wasn’t the type to show around his interest on others, but with a man like that living next door, it was tempting at times. 

The elevator was broken so he was forced to take the stairs, which took up another set of his wasted time since he lived on the seventh floor. Thankfully, before he moved to Bellevue, he lived in a building that had no elevator and a tremendous amount of staircases, so going down them wasn’t much of a struggle. 

Finding his car and getting through traffic was. There was a particular reason as to why Cas liked to leave early, but time had not been friendly on him that morning and it seemed as it purposely fastened for him. 

While driving, he started to feel a little uncomfortable and he remembered that he was to take his suppressant at eight. It was eight-thirty. When Inias said that missing a suppressant meant an abrupt, forced out heat, he was not messing around, and, as minor as the effects were now, he couldn’t walk into his office smelling like the desperate Omega he internally was. 

During a stoplight, he reached for his lunchbox, which he had left inside his car, and opened it. He sighed in relief when he found it underneath a finished potato salad tray, but groaned, and almost cried out in distress when the bottle was empty. 

Cas had become too concerned about other people finding out that he was an Omega, that he forgot to ask his brother for another bottle. 

If the effects were starting to show thirty minutes into missing a pill, then he could only dread what the rest of the day had to offer. 

**-.-.-.-.-.-**

Work was a nightmare. Not because his scent was coming off, it was actually taking its time to show, but because he could feel his Omega instincts scratching him inside, begging him to let them out, but Castiel was strong enough to keep it hidden long enough. Hopefully. 

Last time that happened, he was still with him, and he forced himself to hold back his heat, leading up to painful sleep, but he was willing to commit to anything if it meant keeping the unwanted Alpha away. 

The only thing he could do at the office was keep his profile much lower than usual, and try not to get close to anyone if he were to go somewhere. If he were lucky, his heat would wait until after work to fully explode and put him through those painful waves and desires of getting fucked. If not, then he would have to do what he was best at, and run away. From the office at least, depending on the embarrassment his canine wanted to make him pass.

It had been so long since his last heat, about eight months of taking shitty suppressants with nasty side effects, before his brother Inias offered him a medication that would help his situation. Castiel was doubtful about it at first, it was a medicine he’d never heard of, but it proved to be effective. It held back all of his Omega needs and allowed him to live serenely. 

He didn’t know what missing a pill would feel like. Castiel read the instructions over and over every time he replaced a bottle to make sure it never happened, and the only thing the warning label said was that missing a pill or two, could cause the taker’s scent and mating desires to suddenly erupt, making their aroma incredibly strong, depending on their last cycle, and their cravings mandatory. 

Whenever he was in heat, he became a little needy, bringing himself down to the status of every Omega he criticized. Cas lost control of who he was and all of his morals went down the drain as he turned into someone he barely recognized. 

His skin itched a little as it burned in an unexpected fever. It wasn’t too severe, but it was a little concerning. He used his coat to cover himself, even though he burnt up in his clothes, to make sure his Omega fragrance didn’t get too far if it tried. 

“Hey, Castiel, you doing alright there?” Gabriel, the snooping Omega, looked into his cubicle again, with a wide, devious grin on his face. 

“Y-yes.” Sure, his skin was killing him and his body was trembling, but he was doing fine.

“Doesn’t seem like it.” He teased. 

“I’m just sick.” Cas retorted. 

“Why’d you come to work then?”

“I have a lot of things due today.” He actually didn’t but what else could he have done at home? Watch reruns of Full House? Castiel already did that on the weekends… “But thank you, Gabriel.”

“Oh, c’mon, call me Gabe.” The Omega paused, checking his golden watch, “are you gonna go to lunch? We start our break in like five minutes.”

The image of walking into a cafeteria with a heat threatening to kill him on the spot, overcame his brain and filled him with anxiety. But he was sure he could overcome it if he tried hard enough. “Yeah, I’ll be going to lunch in a little bit. Just allow me to save my work.”

He turned to his computer. There was nothing for him to save, he only had his screensaver, a cliché galaxy looking back at him to remind him that there was no reason to come into work that day. 

Standing up was a bit of pain, his body stung from trying to keep his true nature confidential. Cas had enough practice from past experiences, but he was out of it then. He was not used to working outside the suppressants and much less when there were so many Alpha, Betas, and Omegas waiting for a hint that would give away his status.

“Are you really okay, Cas?”

He nodded, “Yeah, just a bit of a stomach ache. Probably from what I had for breakfast.” It was a possible scenario, but he didn’t eat that morning and he was starving. “Do you know what they serve in the cafeteria?”

Gabriel chuckled, “Food.”

Cas rolled his eyes, “I mean like variations.” Since his first day of work, he had never taken a step to the lunch room because he always brought food for himself along with his pills, but he had neither that afternoon so he settled for the second best. 

“Well, it’s the second Wednesday of the month, so it’s chicken parmesan, meat pasta, and meatballs with chipotle sauce, although I’m not sure about the last one, it usually shifts between days.” 

His stomach grumbled at the sound of those delicious meals and it temporarily took his concentration away from the real problem. With a heat pushing him over the edge and an aggressive hunger ready to devour his insides, he knew his day couldn’t get worse. 

And it did. 

Castiel called it as soon as he made the statement. He’d dug his own grave, painted his own target for that godforsaken curse that followed anyone who thought that nothing could possibly get worse knowing that it would. 

Gabriel took him to the first floor and to the cafeteria. Of the thirty-something tables, only around eleven were taken. Cas didn’t know why he expected it to be overcrowded, but he was glad it wasn’t. There were mostly Betas, around two, no, three Omegas, and five Alphas who all sat together in one table as if they were the popular kids in high school.

“You can sit with me if you’d like.” Gabriel suggested. 

“Thank you.” Cas mumbled. He usually preferred siting alone because he wasn’t very good at keeping a conversation going on for longer unless he wanted something out of the other person, habitually seeking sex, but making a friend wouldn’t hurt. 

They walked to the lunch line, where there was two more people ahead of him, looking into the trays of food to see what they would get. Cas leaned in to take in the wonderful smell of sizzling meat and onions for the meatballs, the prickle of the chipotle sauce slightly burning at his nose. 

But the scent started combining with an unfamiliar one. Was that gasoline and coffee? And hints of pine wood? He inched closer to where it was coming from to make sure…yeah, that was definitely pine…

It was an odd but satisfying combination, very thrilling yet relaxing…it did things to him and he needed to know what it belonged to. It couldn’t be from the food so it had to be of the person ahead of him…

Castiel’s blue eyes looked up and turned to the handsome profile of Dean Winchester, that weird, creepy Alpha that loved to stare at him a little too long that it provoked Cas’ crave to punch his pretty, freckled façade. He was asking the lady behind the counter for a plate of pasta, an elegant grin on his lips as he thanked the old, Beta woman. If she stared any longer, she’d drool into the food. 

“I highly recommend the pasta here. Everything else is crap.” Someone whispered besides him before he instructed the lunch lady for the meatballs. Castiel turned, almost hitting the Alpha who did it, coming face-to-face with Dean.

“You ever hear of personal space?”

“I do. But clearly you haven’t.” He smirked, “You thought I didn’t notice you sniffing me around? Don’t act so innocently, sugar.”

“First of all, don’t call me sugar. Second, it’s really hard to avoid it when it practically stinks here of you.” He went back to the Beta in front of him and stuck with his choice of meatballs. What did this loser know about taste?

The lady gave him his plate and Castiel thanked her. The moment he stepped away from the line and started towards the cash register, he thought he was done with Dean Winchester, but the stubborn Alpha followed, carrying his food with him. He really hoped that son of a bitch wasn’t planning on sitting with him. 

“Can I help you?” He stopped and spun around to give him a threatening look. If he thought Castiel was just some stupid employee who’d let himself get stepped on—

“Are you the one who smells like cinnamon?” Dean got closer, sniffing the air around Castiel, “Oh, is that…yes, it’s apples and…vanilla?”

Cas froze in his place, holding on to his dish firmly, mentally deciding whether to let it drop or keep it where it was. Had it already started and he didn’t notice? Was he too caught up on getting Dean away from him that he didn’t realize that his scent revealed itself? Shit, what the hell could he do? 

“What are you talking about?” What a terrible answer to give, but it was the best he could do when he felt his heat starting to radiate off him, exposing the desperation and starvation of it. He scanned the people around him to see if anyone else noticed. Luckily for him, no one had. There were a few Omega women who looked his way but to focus on the igniting drama. “Leave me alone. Go away.”

“Are you an _omega_?”

Cas’ eyes, flashing between sky blue and golden yellow, widened at the name of his kind. At that moment, his brain concluded what it wanted to do and let his hands open, allowing the plate to fall on the clean floor. Then his feet started moving, running away from the confused Alpha, and not allowing him to stop because his mind was afraid that if he stayed longer, everyone would know about him. 

As he rushed down the hallway, he checked his pockets to see if his keys were in there and not in his cubicle. He feared going deeper into the building and giving his heat a bigger chance to screw him over.

It was the first time he ever left work out of panic, but this time it was urgent. He had not worked his ass off to keep himself hidden from all the dangers Omegas went through, so that he could simply throw it away in the blink of an eye. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm kind of working on a playlist for this story but it's like 60% in Spanish and it's super romantic that my heart melted as I imagined it with Destiel D'X  
> Please tell me what you think, I actually kind of liked the outcome of this chapter.


	3. Chapter 3

** **

 

 

**Chapter Three**

Inias was late, as always. For someone who loved to fix ancient clocks as a hobby, he had no concept of time. He only lived thirty minutes away from Bellevue, forty from Castiel’s apartment, and he still managed to be two hours late, allowing for the youngest of the Novak males to drown in the desperation of his heat. 

Cas was sitting on his bed, a towel wrapped around himself and knees pressed against his chest. He took a cold shower five minutes earlier to clean himself from the slick that oozed down his thighs and to rid that horrendous fever that only increased the more he ignored it. 

God, when was the last time he’d gotten laid? Like a year ago? Less? More? Only God knew how to answer that correctly. 

He’d slept with a few Alphas since his departure from Pontiac, all of them down for a quick, hard fuck that’d help Cas get through the week. Nothing serious. Even if he wanted to, he couldn’t, none of them were willing to stay when he had mating marks all over him. 

The only Alpha who looked at him with love couldn’t handle it, he didn’t like that Cas once belonged to someone else or that he had bites on his body to remind him of it. He didn’t give Castiel a chance to explain or fix it before he walked away. 

After that, Cas decided to distant himself from love, or at least be cautious about it, because he did want an Alpha to care for him as he of them, but he wanted for it to last. He was tired of spending his heats alone and/or seeking someone to get him through it. 

Thankfully, Inias, rang the doorbell just as his slick returned. He stood up, quickly cleaned himself again, and walked to the door to greet his brother. Besides the messy dark hair and tall posture, the siblings barely resembled each other. “How long has it been going, Cas? It stinks of you in there.”

“Nice to see you too, brother.” Cas stepped aside to allow Inias into his apartment. 

“Did it really go off at work?” He wrinkled his nose in disgust at his Castiel’s aroma suffocating him. 

“Yeah, I forgot to call you for a replacement bottle.”

“I thought so. It was a little odd when you didn’t call. I was hoping you’d tell me you found someone, but I guess not.”

“I don’t need anyone to survive.”

“Clearly, but you do need someone to help you through your heats.” It was easy for him to say since he was an Alpha. He didn’t know the difficulties of having random men and women all over his space or actually picking someone. Alphas didn’t have to worry about choosing, Omegas did, and if they didn’t like someone, they had to continue going through people like objects until they found the right one. Castiel was worse at it then the regular Omega; he was picky. He didn’t settle for the first asshole that talked to him pretty, he wanted mutual affection that’d sustain a passionate romance. 

“You are aware that there’s toys for that?”

“Don’t they feel weird? Fake?”

“Of course they do, they’re plastic!”

“That’s not what I meant, Cas. Wouldn’t you prefer the real thing? I mean, that is what Alphas are here for, right? Not to be set aside like you do?”

He groaned, “Inias.” Cas stepped in front of his older brother to hold him by the shoulders and look him in the eyes, “Of _all_ of the Alphas, around seventy percent of them think with the wrong head. They just want to knot the first hole that offers itself to them, they don’t want anything serious. The other thirty percent are either mated or are nowhere to be found.”

“Cas, it’s the twenty-first century! Nobody gives a rat’s ass about ‘ _anything serious_ ’. Even Omegas are starting to slut themselves to Alphas, and, like, fifty years ago they were all about morality and standards.”

“Yeah, but fifty years ago, Omegas also had to wears collars, and it was legal and totally acceptable for Alphas to have them on leashes. Omegas were controlled and submissive, total pansies…” He thought about his statement better. “They still kind of are…but that’s not the point. Times have changed. Omegas now have the ability to choose and reject Alphas, to sleep around with whomever they want.”

Inias shrugged, “I don’t know, man. I just think that there’s no need to be so complex.”

“I can be as complex as I please. Like you said, big brother, it’s the twenty-first century.” He stretched out his hand, “Now, do you have my suppressants?”

The older Novak sighed and reached into his jacket’s pocket to pull out a small, white bottle. “Brand new.”

“Thank you.”

“A bit of an FYI: since you missed a pill, it’s gonna take twelve hours at max for them to go into effect again. It’s best if you stay at home during that time.”

“Twelve hours?”

“Is that bad?”

“No, just…” He thought about the upcoming endurance of his annoying heat, “Frustrating.”

“Better than nothing, little bro.”

Castiel opened the bottle and put a pill on his palm, repeating Inias’ words, “Better than nothing,” before he placed the light blue capsule into his mouth. 

“Well, that’s it for me, Cas, I hope you’re doing better after this.” Inias inspected his brother momentarily, “The scars are fading, you’re looking normal again.”

“They may be fading, but the memories they hold are permanent. Like a tattoo.” Cas mumbled, looking down to his body, his fingers tracing the first bite scar they touched. He was right about them disappearing, but to Castiel, they felt fresh. 

“I should get going. I hope you feel better.”

“It was nice seeing you, Inias.” Cas smiled at his brother, trying not to think about the last time they spent time together. “We should hang out some time, maybe even call Anna and Rachel.” There wasn’t much to say about his other brother, Bartholomew, but he did know that bringing him up would cause tension. 

“It was nice seeing you too, Cas. I’ll think about that hangout idea, I can guarantee that, but don’t set your expectations too high.” He started towards the door, “If Anna and Rachel agree to it today, I’ll definitely do it.”

“Thank you.”

“Ah, don’t worry about it.” He opened the door and turned to face the blue eyes of the youthful Castiel, “I’ll see you again soon, hopefully.”

“Hopefully.”

Inias smiled one last time and left. Cas closed the door behind him and proceeded to his bedroom again. Just as he sat down, his phone came to life with a small ring to signal a new text massage. Oh, he couldn’t wait to see what Inias forgot this time…

_**Don’t freak out, but there’s an Alpha by your door. Not sure if you know him. I’m sticking around just in case he tries something funny. -I** _

Cas stood from his bed once more and typed a reply. 

_**Does he look intimidating? Also, thank you :) -C** _

He waited for a few seconds. 

_**Nah. But you never know. No problem, and be careful when you answer. -I** _

Cas put his phone down and slowly walked to the door again. He had no idea who it could’ve been, or why they would be here, but he was acting like the protagonist of a horror movie by investigating.

He could barely smell the Alpha from the other side, but something about them radiated strength and when he opened the door, he was expecting someone scary looking and very big. Not Dean Winchester.

Not that Dean wasn’t big and scary. With the tight, black shirt he wore, his muscular arms were put to justice, outlining every piece of them and making it seem as if at any moment, they would rip through the material. His scent was stronger than Castiel remembered that it made him crinkle his nose in discomfort because it was low-key provoking his Omega needs. 

“What are you doing here?”

“You weren’t at work today so…” He paused, thinking about something Castiel couldn’t decipher, “I got a little worried.”

“How did you find me; you don’t even know my name.”

“Actually, that’s where you’re wrong. I’ve heard plenty about you, about how you hide your scent that it’s difficult not to pick up your name from the office Omegas. Castiel Novak, right?” A playful smile played on his lips that Cas wanted to slap off, but couldn’t. He took his concern into consideration. It was the first time someone cared about his health enough to visit him. 

Cas blinked, “Okay, but how did you find my place?”

“I might’ve looked through your files…”

He scoffed, “You’re such a creep.” Cas tried to close off his door, but Dean’s hand stopped him, and even though Cas’ power put up a fight, it couldn’t compete against the Alpha’s. 

“You’re pretty strong for an Omega, you know? It’s quite impressive.”

“What do you want?”

“I just…Look, I’m not here for trouble, I just want to know if you’re doing okay, that’s all.” He sheepishly smiled, “I hope that’s alright with you.”

“It’s not. Please leave me alone.” He tried again to close his door, but no luck. Dean somehow got sturdier the second time he went for it. 

“If it makes you feel any better,” Dean lifted a brown bag whose aroma made Cas’ stomach grumble, “I brought you some food.” Cas tried to grab it, but Dean moved it away, “You can have it if you allow me inside.”

Cas chuckled, “I rather starve to death.”

“Suit yourself.”

“What is it anyways?”

“Chinese.”

Shit. 

Castiel had been dying for Chinese food the past few days, mostly for the sweet chicken with rice. He didn’t know if it was first-timer’s luck that somehow Dean guessed his craves, but he wanted whatever he had in that bag. 

“Fine.” Cas stepped aside, allowing a proper entrance to the green eyed beauty. 

Okay, so Dean was very attractive, he couldn’t help himself from staring like an idiot. Who wouldn’t in his place? That guy was made so that he could have all the Omegas kissing his feet. No one should be granted that amount of handsomeness Dean had, he could melt another person with a simple smile if he wanted to. 

Dean whistled, “Man, you really aren’t like the other Omegas.” He was looking around his place, inspecting every inch of the small apartment. So what if it wasn’t the cleanest? Cas was never in the mood to polish it up. Although, internally he felt like he should’ve, because ‘it’s the Omega thing to do’, and most of them are tidy and clean, always prepared for visits.

“Is that a problem?” Castiel asked as he snatched the bag of food from Dean’s hand. 

“No, not at all, just odd.” He smelled the air, “Are you seriously okay, man? It kind of feels like you’re in…heat.”

 “I’m fine, don’t think about it too much.” He felt less pressured than before he took the suppressant, so that was good. “Why don’t you just take a seat over there.” Cas pointed at his table for two.

“So, like, was that Alpha your mate?” Dean asked and sat down, digging his hands inside the bag to grab one of the white boxes. 

“He’s my brother.” Cas corrected immediately. 

Dean watched him as he took the other chair, “Oh. Do you have a mate, then? Seems like you do.” He eyed the marks on his body, Castiel forgot they weren’t covered up. They were all exposed and Dean’s stare was burning at them, probably already judging him and creating a story to tell. 

“I don’t have a mate.” He murmured, taking the available seat on the opposite side. “What did you bring?”

Dean reached for the bag and looked through it again, “Noodles, fried rice, sweet and sour chicken, dumplings…Oh! And I stopped by the store to buy some sushi. I know how you Omegas like that stuff…” His voice faded when Castiel glared, “Sorry.”

“You don’t seem to have a filter.” Cas took one of the boxes of sweet chicken. He controlled himself so that he wouldn’t demolish it as soon as he had it in his hands, but he was starving that he almost gave up.

“I’ve never had to watch what I say around anyone. Especially Omegas.”

“That’s because they worship the ground you walk on. Not all of them are like that. Some, like me, can barely stand you.”

“Ah,” Dean grinned, “But everyone has a soft spot. It won’t be long before I find yours. You’re a difficult person to read, yes, but you’re not impossible. I’ve dealt with impossible.”

“I highly doubt that.” 

“Mr. Marks.” Their boss, “Felt the same way, but I got the best of him eventually. So, I'm pretty sure can do the same to you.”

“I wouldn’t count on that. You want me to soften around you when you had to look through my files to find my home address? That’s asking a lot from me already. Honestly, I don’t even know what I expected from an Alpha.” 

Castiel took his time with taking in the sight in front of him. As handsome as Dean was, he was fairly peculiar. He was tall and muscular, yes, but he wasn’t those exaggerated Alphas that could destroy an Omega during sex. He was lean and proportionate, full in all the right places, and handsome in ways he shouldn’t. For example, he ate like an animal, and used a plastic fork instead of the chopsticks, yet he was gracious while he did so. He opened his fortune cookie first before he ate, and ate the cookie but didn’t read his fortune, muttering something about not believing in that bullshit. 

“Did you tell anyone I was an Omega?” Castiel questioned, poking at the chicken inside his box with his chopsticks. His heat made him forget that he had bigger concerns outside of his apartment, but seeing Dean reminded him of it.

Thankfully, he shook his head, “Nah, that’s not me. There’s must be a reason for you to keep it hidden. I wouldn’t want to be the asshole who outs you in that way.”

Cas remained still, “Thank you.”

“Why do you hide it? You don’t have to tell me if it makes you uncomfortable, but I am a bit curious.”

“I prefer not to say. It’s not good for me to recall.” Too painful for his head.

“I understand.”

He continued to eat. Cas wished to know why Dean suddenly cared about him. He wasn’t used to that kind of affection, to the realness of it. The last people who told him they cared, set him up with his abuser. “Is there anything you want from me, Dean?”

“Huh?” Cas could feel the shock in his response, “I don’t want anything from you, Castiel.”

Cas put down his food and crossed his arms, “I know you’re not stupid. You know I’m in heat and your Alpha cannot be that strong to hold back what it wants out of me.”

“I was just worried about you. Anyone who saw you run off the way you did would feel the same way.”

“That’s not true. I’ve had experiences with several Alphas who weren’t like that. They just wanted a hole to knot. If that’s the case with you, as nicely as you’re trying to cover it, you’re in the wrong place and with the wrong person for that. I am not your stereotypical Omega and I will not allow myself to get stepped on for a chance to get noticed by another Alpha. I’ve supported myself for years now, and that won’t change over you.”

“I wasn’t trying to get to you in that way. I’m not like that. I don’t need to.” He seemed offended and for a moment, Cas almost bought it. 

“You expect me to believe that?”

“That’s up to you, sweetheart.” Dean grabbed a napkin and cleaned his mouth and hands. “I wanted to be generous because you ran out of the office. If you don’t know how to take that nicely, then I don’t know how you expect to find someone. I know you’re in heat, but that’s not what I’m here for.”

He didn’t feel it at first, but as soon as Dean stood from his chair, his heartbeat was audible and it pounded in his chest like a drum. Maybe he should’ve felt a little bad about treating Dean Winchester like that, but his pride ate at him and did not allow him to surrender. 

“Will you be going to the office party this weekend?” He kind of expected Dean to walk away after their argument, but he stuck around apparently.

“Will you?”

“I asked first.”

Cas sighed and nodded, “I will.” He thought about being a dick and say that he would consider it, but who was he trying to fool? He’d totally go because he had nothing better to do alone. 

“I was hoping you would.” Dean gave him a small smile, shy and distant, incomparable to the vibrant ones he gave him earlier, “I’m glad you’re okay and I’ll see you at work once you’re better.” 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please tell me what you think!


	4. Chapter 4

** **

 

** **

 

**Chapter 4**

Dean was a social butterfly, he talked to and knew everyone in the office, and the people loved him for it. He spotted him the moment he stepped out of the elevator, and their eyes connected with opposite reactions. Cas’ reflected annoyance, and Dean’s contentment in seeing him there.  

When Cas walked in, it was different. They all stopped talking to stare his way as if he were a new species of animal they wanted to investigate. They didn’t smile at him like they did when Dean came close, they just gave confused/shocked looks, all wondering how he made the time to show up.

Castiel wanted it that way, he made himself look more important than he really was that his coworkers bought it. That night, he showed up in a dressing shirt, tie, and gray vest, looking taller and bulkier than usual, no different than what he usually wore at work, so that it could show how little he cared. Not that he wanted to look cool, because he totally didn’t, but if it could, then that would be even better.   

He stood by the snack’s table, with his second can of orange soda in his hands. For a while, he hummed to the music, the ones he knew at least, but then he got bored of it.

The first one to approach him that night was that Beta girl, Charlie, walking his way with eyes full of shock. “Wow, you really showed! For a moment there, I thought you would stick to that bullshit story about having something to do.”

“I did have something to do.” He didn’t.

“Is that why you showed up an hour late?”

“Why else?” Maybe because he decided to take an unnecessary nap and overslept…? “The party…” He wished to say fun, but everything was literally the same thing as work. Alphas stuck to Alphas, Betas tried to fit in the superior class and avoided each other, and Omegas grouped together and moved to the corners to gossip about their coworkers. “It seems thrilling.” It was the best he could do.

“Half the people we invited didn’t show up.”

“It’s still pretty crowded.”

“It shows how many of us actually like poor Zachariah.”

Cas had never heard much of him. He just knew Zachariah as the guy who hired him, but that was it. He remembered him being pretty calm, polite even, never passed by anyone without greeting them, so it was pretty difficult to pinpoint why some of his coworkers didn’t like him.

“So, mind telling me why you missed work this week?” Charlie asked.

“I was gone for like a day, calm down.”

“One day was enough to get us wondering. Some Omegas are saying you ran off.” She leaned closer to him, making Castiel uncomfortable, “Did ya?”

“That’s none of your business.”

“I also heard that heartthrob Alpha Dean Winchester went to see you, mind sharing why?” She smiled innocently, turning that nosy perspective of hers into the sweet, caring Beta she was trying to be.

His eyes widened at the mention of Dean’s name, “How the hell did you even find out about that?”

“You would be surprised at how quickly word spreads.”

“No, I’m aware of that, I just want to know how you found out about Dean and I.”

“Aha! So it’s true!” Charlie raised her voice as she cheered her victory and heads turned their way.

“I never said that.”

“You don’t need to, honey, there’s a lot to read between the lines…Did you guys, like, sleep together. What happened when he showed up?”

Castiel groaned, he wanted to die on the spot and get it over with, “We didn’t do anything. He just brought me lunch because he worried about me. That’s it.” He was also rude to the Alpha, but Charlie didn’t have to know that. She already knew enough then, so Cas kept the information confidential.

“If you guys did anything—”

“You know what, Charlie? I’m not doing this. I am beyond tired about everyone snooping around in my business as if they owned it. They don’t. I want to keep my personal life private, and you’re seriously making it much harder than it should be. I came to the party in the hopes to get along with other people, but now I see that I shouldn’t.” He put down his drink, “If you’ll excuse me…”

He heard Charlie giggle behind him, but chose to ignore her. With every step, the elevator was closer, and his desire to go home increased.

It was hard to believe, but Castiel enjoyed get-togethers. What he did not like was people cornering him to investigate about his life. It was one thing to get to know him, another was to force a friendship he didn’t want.

When he was in front of the metal doors, he hesitated in pressing the down button, because he thought about what he would do back home. Nothing. He would do nothing, actually. The only thing waiting for him in his apartment was his very comfortable body pillow, and his Netflix account ready with the episodes he needed to finish Jessica Jones.

He sighed, and backed away from the elevator. Instead of leaving, he would go to around the building and look for a quiet place to calm himself. Perhaps after he was done, he’d be approachable and tolerable. Cas was in deep need of friends.

So he started down the hallways, pushing open glass doors, roaming around in the floor, looking for a place where no one could come close to him out of curiosity, and he eventually found some place.

He had never investigated deep into his workplace, since his head was devoted into sticking into the same plain-ass routine, so his eyes were full of wonder, seeking for something interesting to catch his eye and encourage him to continue.

It was too far away from the party, and from the way lighting barely reached where he stood, Cas knew that he was where he shouldn’t. But curiosity sparked when he saw a distant light coming a distant office.

Castiel approached it slowly, wondering why anyone would be there unless they felt as miserable as he did. Hopefully it wouldn’t be anything too terrifying for him to handle, the last thing he wanted was to punch someone due to a jump scare.

The office belonged to one of the managers, a Beta named Pamela Barnes, and as soon as he got close enough, he understood what went on the other side of that locked door. It was fain t in the beginning but as time went by and the residents got further into their action. There was all this panting, sounds of skin slapping against skin, and moaning on her behalf for, Cas guessed, her partner Benny.

He laughed, the first time since he moved to Bellevue in fact, and wanted to interrupt to see their reactions, the devious side of his Omega kicking at him, but he was the better person and didn’t do it.

As soon as he turned though, his whole body slammed against what felt like a wall, but it wasn’t until Castiel regained awareness, that he understood that it wasn’t a wall, but a body.

“What are you doing here?” Dean Winchester asked, his voice far more sensual than the last time Cas heard it that close. It didn’t help that the white button up shirt he wore with the rolled sleeves and tie boosted his level of handsomeness, making Castiel recognize how weak he’d become over a man he was supposed to not get along with.

“I should ask you the same thing.” He tried to ignore the delicious scent that radiated off him, but it was unavoidable and it did things to him he thought he’d never feel again.

“Were you…” His eyes glanced between the door of Pamela Barnes’s office and Castiel, and Cas could tell the moment his ears caught on to the act happening inside the office because he was quick to ask, “Were you listening in?”

“What? No!”

“Then what were—”

“It’s hard to be in a party where everyone knows that you went to my apartment.” Cas straightened himself, recuperating his posture, “What did you tell them, by the way. Because that Beta Charlie Bradbury brought something up about us sleeping together.”

“I didn’t say anything. It was most likely those Omegas that saw you ran off Wednesday.” He ran hand through his hair, his gesture driving Castiel’s wolf to insanity. God, Dean was so fucking irresistible! “Jesus Christ…”

“What…?”

A grin spread on Dean’s face, “Is that Benny with Pamela? My Benny?”

Obviously Cas knew who Benny was from the way Pamela kept crying out his name every time he pounded into her, but outside of that, he’d never heard that name before, or the face that went along with it “I have no idea who you’re talking about.”

“Benny Laffite? He’s one of the accountants?”

“I still don’t know.”

“Never mind.” But the smile didn’t fade, “So, turns out you’re a little pervert, huh?”

Castiel glared at the Alpha, “Excuse me?”

“Oh c’mon, sweetheart, don’t tell me you weren’t a little curious about what was happening in that office. Why else would you be here?”

“Do not call me sweetheart, mutt.” Cas warned, his blue eyes burning holes into Dean’s flawless face. “And I was here because I hate the party. I was in a good mood until somebody ruined it. I was surprised it wasn’t you this time…What about you? Were you following me again?”

“Well, no, I was around.”

“Why?”

“Needed to feed an old habit.”

“A habit.” He wanted to believe him, but his insides told him not to.

Dean nodded and reached into his pants’ pockets, pulling out a small, white and red box, “I’m shamefully a smoker.”

“You are aware that it can kill you…”

“Everyone knows that, Cas. Besides, it’s not like I do it often. I only smoke when I’m upset. Not that you care, of course, but it’s best if you knew why I do it before you jump into the ‘don’t smoke’ speech.” Dean put away his pack of cigarettes, “Would you like to come to my office?”

“No, thank you.”

“It’s not for what you think. We would look like less perverts in case Pamela and Benny walk out.”

“I’m quite sure they already know we’re here.” Or at least Dean, since his voice was kind of loud. “There’s no need to take me to your office. Don’t try to play me as stupid, I know what you want, and I won’t fall for it.” Even if his Omega needs really wanted to.

“I literally just said that I had no bad intentions when I asked you to come to my office. Seriously, why do you get so hostile when I try to be nice with you? What did I ever do to you except care?”

Castiel sighed, he felt as if a giant weight fell on his shoulders. “It’s not you, Dean. It’s everything. I’m not used to people caring about me like you do…The people who have…” He paused, “They have a funny way of showing it.” His parents and ex were a prime example of that.

“But I’m not like that, Cas.” Dean touched his shoulder as a way to comfort him but, Cas immediately retreated from the act, and raised the walls that momentarily exposed his vulnerability again.

“How would I know? You could be saying that to get what you want?”

Dean rolled his eyes, “Is it so hard for you to accompany me to my office? If I try anything, you’re in all your rights to sue me for sexual assault.” He raised his hands in defeat, “I just want to show you something.”

Castiel crossed his arms, thinking about Dean’s proposal, “It better not be anything inappropriate.”

“Of course—Why do you do that? Why won’t you allow me to be your friend? Is it still forbidden for Alphas to befriend Omegas? Are we still in the in the nineteen-fifties because I didn’t realize…”

The Omega bit the inside of his cheek to hold in an insult. Despite his great dislike towards Dean, he had to remind himself that he was one of his superiors and had to calm himself down every now and then. “You try anything funny,” Cas cautioned, “And I won’t be as nice as I have been.”

“You were being nice?”

“Shut up and lead the way.”

Dean started into the unlit floor, taking them into one of the offices known for the bigger names of the company. For a moment, Castiel assumed Dean wanted to play a joke by taking him there and was close to insulting him, until they stopped in front a door with a golden plaque that had the Alpha’s name imprinted in bold, black letters.

He reached into his pants again and grabbed his keys to unlock the wide and tall door. Dean turned on the lights to his office, illuminating the space and revealing what was supposed to be his office, but to Castiel, it seemed like a hangout room.

Dean had a couch, a television hanging on the wall, a mini fridge, a microwave, and his desk, which was the only thing inside that was out of place. It wasn’t the mess Cas expected, but it wasn’t neat either. Luckily for him, he had a large window that had a lovely view to the nightly city.

“Your office is bigger than ten cubicles put together, who did you have to sleep with to get a place like this? You’re only a manager. Not even the vice president has an office this big.” And he had been to the vice president’s office when he was hired, it was probably half of what Dean had.

Dean smiled, “I didn’t sleep with anyone. All of this is from hard work.”

“Right.”

“I’m serious!” He remained quiet for a moment, “Okay, maybe not all of it’s from hard work. About sixty percent of it was. Forty percent was because Mr. Marks and I are close friends and he kind of prefers me over his daughter.”

“That’s shitty.” Cas mumbled as he stepped closer to the window, admiring the sight in front of him. All those building and cars still running this late at night as if they didn’t have a worry in the world, too busy with their own lives to care about their surroundings.

He shrugged, “It’s not my fault his girl doesn’t want to run the business. All I did was befriend a guy with kid issues, I never thought he’d grow attached to me enough to give me a luxury office.”

“How did you even do it? Isn’t Mr. Marks known to be a jackass?”

Dean leaned against the window, arms folded against his chest, “He’s very nice, actually, you just have to know how to get to him. In way, every person is the same…they may have an ice cold exterior, but there’s always a way to pierce through that…”

“Didn’t you want to do that with me?”

“Only if you allow me to.”

“I’ve told you to leave me alone and you didn’t.”

“There’s something different about you; I’m not sure as to what yet, but I like you. In a friendly manner though, I don’t want you to go off on me for saying that without a clarification.” Dean teased, “It’s not unheard of for Alphas and Omegas to be friends.”

“I don’t want to be friends with an Alpha.” Not because it was difficult, but because in the end, they only wanted one thing from the Omega. “It was nice of you to show up at my place, and I appreciate that you care, but I don’t think that you and I could be proper friends. I’ve had…very, unpleasant memories with an Alpha that also wanted to be my friend, but ended up hurting me more than I deserved.”

“I’m sorry about that.”

“It’s not your fault…” When Dean tried to touch him again, Cas allowed him to, and he had to admit that it felt nice to have an Alpha come near him like that. He smiled at Dean, letting their eyes meet again that night. There was no resentment then from either of them, just the electricity that flowed through their touch.

As Castiel processed what was happening, he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. What a great way to ruin the moment. He checked the screen to see who it was, and unfortunately, it wasn’t anyone worth answering because he recognized that phone number anywhere.

 _Gadreel_.

“You gonna answer that?” Dean intervened.

“Uh,” Cas shook his head and sent the caller to voicemail, “No, it’s nobody important.” But the name still felt like a kick to the gut. It had taken his ex-boyfriend long enough to find his new number, probably got it from one of his siblings. “I have to go.” He whispered. Cas wanted to call back Gadreel to tell him to leave him alone, but the instant he recalled the abandonment of the Alpha, he wanted to go home and get under the covers to die.

Dean looked surprised, “Did I say something wrong? You can’t stay longer?”

“No, sorry.”

“Wait, Cas,” Dean grabbed Cas by the arm and stopped him, “allow me to take you home.”

Cas hated when people touched him, so he flinched a little when Dean did it, “I have my own ride, but thank you…” He caught the look of disappointment in his emerald eyes and chose to continue with a proper clarification, “I appreciate your kindness, I truly do, but you caught me in a bad time. I hate using this, but this is the cliché, ‘ _it’s not you, it’s me_ ’…”

Dean slowly let go, “Alright…”

He didn’t say his goodbye, or allowed Dean to say his, Cas just walked out of the office, past the dark hallways, and back into the party, where people wondered where he was going. His intention for leaving was initially because he wanted to call his ex-boyfriend and tell him off, but as he walked past his colleagues, the harsh truth hit him.

Cas wanted to leave because he didn’t belong. He was different, the black sheep of the herd. He wasn’t the Omega every Alpha wanted, he was everything but, the stupid different one that nobody desired and was meant to die alone. Gadreel was the outcome of that, how no one would ever stay with a dirtied Omega like him.

A dirtied Omega.

Yeah, that’s what he fucking was.

Dirty, tainted, unwanted, and he had a hard time thinking about Dean ever seeing him in a different light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoy this chapter because the angst is coming and so is the smut. Quick I know, but I will explain and hopefully you will understand what I was trying to achieve. This is sort of gonna be like a quick build for several reasons that I cannot explain because spoilers. I hope you liked it and please tell me what you think.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

During very rare occasions, Dean would have more than one cigarette per week. That day, he had two. Cas’ scent of distress ticked him off and his upset wolf pushed him towards another one. 

He wondered about who called him. His gut guessed that it might’ve been the same man who marked him for life, but the Omega’s reaction made it impossible to tell. Sure, he picked up the distortion in aroma and his features altering, but it wasn’t as obvious as Dean wanted to reach a proper conclusion. 

He had never been the type to leave parties early, he was used to being the last, but this time, it was different, he was uncomfortable. Dean had felt this way before, but it wasn’t easy to recall since it occurred when he was younger, but the feeling settled within him, pushing him to explore it further or to see if it was still Castiel the one who did this to him. 

Dean only wanted to be the Omega’s friend, he wanted to get to know him. In his opinion, there was no reason to make it so difficult, but it was aat it frustrated him immensely. 

With a sigh of annoyance, he lit up the second cigarette, and allowed the smoke to burn into his lungs like the irritation he suddenly felt towards the mysterious Omega. At first, he guessed it was because he’d never had anyone reject him like that. Dean considered himself the Alpha of the moment! The cool guy of the office! And suddenly, with Cas not wanting anything with him, it was a bit painful on his behalf. 

The weather outside was pretty cold for a November night. It wasn’t snowing, but it was quite chilly that Dean required two sets of coats to keep him warm. Perhaps because he was a farm boy used to the hot and humid weather of the Kansas summers. Bellevue—well, Washington in general—was a one-eighty turn of the life he was accustomed to. 

It took some time to get familiar with, his job helped out with that, but he still felt like something was missing. It never happened until he met Castiel a horrendous Tuesday afternoon. 

The day had been busier than usual, everyone had been on their toes trying to get their tasks done before a new major client showed up. Cain had been very specific about wanting everything to be perfect. Along the lines of a work-heavy tension, there’d been talks about a new guy working with the accountants. Nobody knew if he was an Alpha, Beta, or Omega, because apparently he didn’t have a scent, they just knew that he existed and he was with them. 

Dean met Cas that same evening when he was rushing to a meeting and he bumped into him, causing the Omega to drop all his papers. He didn’t look back, didn’t care enough to turn around and help him, but he was aware of what he did, and he knew who Castiel was the moment their bodies made contact because his Alpha sense nudged at him to look at the fresh meat. He hesitated and it felt like years since the last time his wolf had encouraged him to do something, but he did not give in.

He wished he could explain what it was about Cas that made him feel changed. 

When he was done with the cigarette, Dean threw it to the floor and stepped on it to put out the heat of it. The only thing he wanted at that moment was to go home, fall asleep on his expensive bed, and hope that he’d forget about Castiel the following morning. 

But destiny turned his purpose into a running joke the moment he made a turn to the parking lot, and found the said Omega talking on the phone, a frustrated look playing on his face, in front of his smoking car. 

“No, I’m tired okay, Gad—Listen to me, no, listen—I don’t want to hear your shitty excuses just—stop, please, just stop saying that. You don’t mean it; you never did…How can you blame this on me? I loved…” His voice faded when his blue eyes met Dean’s. “Just forget about it, okay? Don’t call me again…” He tapped on his phone and put it away, “Dean.”

“Hey, man, you okay?”

“I’m fine…my car broke down. I don’t know what happened.” He gestured at the increasing smoke coming from under the hood. 

Luckily for Castiel, Dean came from a family of mechanics, so he knew what the problem was without having to look at it, “Don’t worry about it.” He smiled with the confidence that his action would reach the frowning man.

“You know about cars?”

“My whole family does.” He smirked.

“So can you fix this?” Cas raised his eyebrows in doubt. 

Dean nodded, “Mhmm. I could probably get it to my Uncle Bobby’s garage since it’s fairly close, tell him you’re a friend of mine and he’ll give you a huge discount. You’ll have your car back in less than twenty-four hours.”

“Oh yeah? In exchange for what?”

The Alpha prepared himself for what he was certain would come next, “I don’t want anything. I don’t know how many times I have to say that.”

It surprised Dean when Castiel didn’t respond with a rude comment, “Thank you.”

“You gonna call a cab? I could wait here with you if you’d like.” Dean wondered as he proceeded to the hood of the Omega’s car and lifted it. 

“Actually,” Castiel started, “I was wondering if you could give me a ride, maybe? You don’t have to, of course. It’s just that I wasn’t counting on my car failing on me, so I didn’t bring a lot of money…” There was a sort of innocence enacting in his voice that hit his wolf in areas it never thought about before. 

“Uh, yeah, sure, of course!” Dean babbled. He only did that when he was slightly nervous. When he was really anxious, babbling was the last thing he had to worry about. 

“Okay. I’ll get my stuff and you can lead me to your car.” Cas smiled. Dean nodded that something changed about him, he could smell it in him. It was a combination between concern and something he couldn’t really decode, but it was good, very aesthetically pleasing. 

Cas waited for him with his trench coat in one hand and keys on the other. For some odd reason, he wasn’t looking as mean as before. As always, he set up the card of mystery emotion that made it harder for Dean to read past his outside. 

“You ready?”

“Yes.” 

His Impala was parked on a spot especially reserved for him in front of the building’s doors. Landing a spot like that took a lot of hard work from the employee, you basically had to be the vice president to land something like that, but, honestly, all Dean had to do was become close friends with Cain Marks and all of the perks that came with it practically flew at him. 

“Nice ride.” Cas ran his hand through the shiny paint of his ‘baby’. 

“She’s my pride and joy.”

“I bet.” The Omega chuckled, “Must’ve cost a fortune.”

“No, not really. I picked her up from a dumpster and put her together to be the beauty she is now. She’s like, my Frankenstein monster gone right, you know?”

“I don’t understand the connection, but I get what you mean.” His fingers traced the structure of the beauty, admiring it for a while before getting inside. 

Shamefully, he threw a triumphing smile at the sky. Not because he had bad intentions towards the guy waiting for him inside his car, but because he was getting him to soften down a little. Just a little bit. Wasn’t much to show off, but it was progressive.

Throughout their drive they remained quiet, except for when Castiel made a joke about Dean not needing his address when he remembered it from the last time he went there. It was a little embarrassing to admit to himself that worry and a bit of stalking got him there…

All the talking his coworkers made of Castiel was somewhat right. The guy was very handsome in a risqué angle, but not exaggerated. He had looks of a real, top Beta bordering a small-framed Alpha, but he caught the Omega features in him as well. His blue eyes stood out in the dark of the night, seeming like another set of stars that fell from the showered sky. 

They reached his building. Under a different lighting, the place wasn’t as terrible looking as his past visit. “Thank you.”

“Do you need me to walk you in?”

“Are you okay with that?”

He shrugged, “I don’t mind.”

Dean followed Castiel into the building, taking the elevator together, remaining still around each other until they reached the floor of Castiel’s apartment. Dean wanted to speak up first, wanted to apologize for overreacting when he didn’t need to, or when he surpassed the limitations Castiel set up for him—

“Would you like to come in?”

“Nah, it’s alright. I have to get going and call my Uncle Bobby to pick up your car…” He stopped and gulped when Castiel walked towards him, gripping on his shirt and pulling him into his apartment. 

“Cas…” He attempted to say something, but Cas hushed him in more than one way. The most effective one was by surging his body against his. 

“Shhh…”

The Omega took in the sight in front of him, making Dean extremely nervous about what suddenly shifted between them. One moment Cas was cold, mean, and distant, and now he was…well, like Sarah Michelle Gellar in Cruel Intentions…

Dean wasn’t sure if this was a test of some sort, but Castiel didn’t seem to be the type of Omega to tease just to be an asshole. There was no denying the Omega was anything but typical, he wasn’t small and delicate or submissive because it was expected of him. 

However, Dean couldn’t lie to himself, he was very attracted to the tall Omega, there was something exotic about him that made his brain short-circuit every time he would catch a whiff of his alluring scent. 

Castiel was practically flushed against him and he sensed his hesitance and placed his hands against Dean’s chest. “I know I’m ‘different’, but as an Omega I still need what only a strong Alpha can give me.”

Dean’s jade green eyes went wide as his wolf surged forward to take over as Castiel’s words poured over him. In a flash, he had Castiel pinned against the wall, just inside of his entrance way and pushed against him, gaining a surprised gasp from those dry, plush lips. It only took a second for Castiel to respond by grabbing Dean’s tie and pull him down to meet his lips. It was a soft pressure of their mouths, a tease of how each tasted.

A low growl came from Dean’s chest as he wrapped his arms around the Omega and deepened the kiss hungrily. Castiel matched his crave, his own tongue fighting Dean’s for dominance as he raked his fingers through the Alpha’s short hair. The air between them crackled like electricity as urgency overtook them. They nipped and kissed as their hands rushed to remove their own clothes, both needing to feel skin against skin.

“Bedroom” Dean managed to say as he practically ripped off his dress shirt and cupped Castiel’s face in order to map out his mouth greedily. The Omega groaned as the Alpha pressed against him, the contact sent shivers of want through him and he could feel his slick starting to ease from his hole. Castiel finally removed his shirt and vest from himself completely as Dean started to lick and suck at his neck, finding a particular spot that made his knees weak, hips bucking against Dean’s.

Dean growled and Castiel stepped away from him and pulling the Alpha down the hall into his bedroom where he shoved him on the bed and straddled his lap all in fluid motion before he captured Dean’s lips into a searing kiss. Hands roamed everywhere, groping and kneading roughly as Castiel started to grind down against the Alpha. He could feel Dean’s impressive bulge through his pants. The Omega moaned and fuck, Dean loved the sound. He grasped Castiel’s firm ass and pushed him down as he thrusted upwards. 

“Want your cock, Dean.” Castiel whispered as Dean latched onto his neck. The Alpha flipped them, almost throwing the Omega onto the bed, who hurried to yank off his own slacks and slick soaked brief, dropping them to the floor before grabbing a condom from his nightstand. He looked back up to find the Alpha’s emerald green eyes intense and trained on him as Dean dropped his pants and boxers to the floor. He covered Castiel in seconds, taking his lips into a deep and filthy kiss with all tongue, making Cas sigh in the most delicious way. 

Castiel’s body was so hot and tingling as he fought Dean with his tongue. He nipped at him as his large hands roamed Cas’s body possessively. Dean’s tongue licked across his jawline, scent marking him, making the Omega bite his lower lip as he trembled from want. It took Castiel a moment to realize what Dean’s mouth and hands were doing and he almost panicked, but the Alpha was growling and groaning into his flesh as he traced Castiel’s mating scars. Dean sucked at the scar on his neck closes to his jaw while his fingers drew the two scars on each side of his ribs, digging hard enough to leave bruises, silently telling Castiel’s body, Castiel’s wolf, that he was to one marking him now. Dean’s mouth then sucked at the two scars by his collar bones and he could feel how Castiel was burning with need because his hole pulsed from the ministrations as the Alpha’s hips grinded into his, hard and thick cock promising pleasure.

Dean suddenly nipped at the mark on his clavicle gaining a sharp gasp from Castiel as Dean claimed his lips again. The Omega wrapped his legs around the Alpha’s waist, letting him know he wanted to be fucked, _now_. 

The Alpha licked into his mouth, dominant and demanding before he desperately grasped Castiel's thighs, spreading his legs and exposing him, making Castiel gasp before he lowered his lips to give the Omega open mouth kisses and licks at his lower stomach, inching towards his thighs, tongue leaving a trail of saliva as he reached the mating scar on the Omega’s left inner thigh. Dean sucked a bruise into it, sending shrills of pleasure up and down Castiel’s spine while the Alpha’s left hand teased his right nipple. Dean was mouthing at his heated skin, lapping his tongue over the scar closest to Cas’ cock before taking him into his mouth in one go. 

He moaned, his hands going straight for Dean’s hair, pulling and tugging as the Alpha swirled his tongue around his hard cock. 

“Dean.” The Omega almost cried out as Dean’s fingers started to circle his rim, playing in the heavy leaking slick before he carefully pushed two fingers in. Castiel keened, his hips already doing little circles while Dean’s mouth tortured him. The Alpha was pumping his fingers in and out of him in sync to his mouth sliding up and down his cock.

Castiel arched off the bed as Dean slid in a third finger into him, his mouth leaving him and claiming the Omega’s lips in a rushed and hot kiss, tongues swirling and tasting. Castiel’s hand roamed the Alpha’s back and shoulders, nails running up and down, giving him shivers before digging them into his skin. Dean pulled away slightly, retreating his fingers to rip the condom packaging, then ease it down his aching cock, pinching the top before settling himself between the Omega’s legs again. 

Cas grabbed his face, surging forward to kiss him, sucking on his tongue, making Dean push into him. The Omega broke their kiss, needing to cry out at being filled. The slight burn of the Alpha’s thick cock stretching him felt incredible as Dean slid deep into him to the hilt. Castiel gasped and panted, his skin so hot and flushed as Dean let him adjust, kissing the scar on his shoulder.

The Omega thrust his hips, letting the Alpha know he could move. “Fuck me.” He commanded and Dean started to slide out. 

He slammed his hips into him and Castiel met him with every thrust. He ran his nails up and down Dean’s back, pulled and yanked at the Alpha’s hair, the sheets, the pillows, anything that could express how good he felt. Dean fucked into him deep and fast, making a string of “ _Please, Dean, harder!_ ” fall from the Omega’s kiss swollen mouth. Dean growled and delivered a harsh pace, exactly what Castiel needed as he punched his prostate over and over, making him scream in pleasure. 

“Fuck me, yes! Yes!” The Alpha was making him feel incredible. He was close, Dean noticed, but Castiel didn’t want it to end so quickly. He caught him by surprised when he clasped his legs tightly around Dean’s waist and managed to spin them. 

Dean looked up at him wide eyed and was surprised as Castiel adjusted above him, sliding down his cock, swirling his hips, gloriously fucking himself on the Alpha’s cock like he owned it. He was practically screaming in awe as Dean’s hands gripped his hips painfully. There would be bruises in the morning and he wanted them as he bounced on Dean’s cock like it was the best thing in the world.

He was getting moans and gasps from the Alpha below him, who managed to thrust up into him every time he came down. Both were sweaty and hot, panting as skin slammed against skin in a delirious song of fuck-me sex.

Castiel looked down at Dean, his cobalt blue eyes heavy and blown wide with arousal as the Alpha’s musky scent caressed his senses. Dean’s green orbs were almost completely black and were watching him intently. A wave of self-consciousness hit Castiel as Dean’s left hand reached up to caress one of his nipples. Even with Dean’s earlier need to kiss and touch his many scars, he couldn’t help but worry about it now when Dean was watching him so intriguingly. 

“God, you’re beautiful.” Dean couldn’t stop himself, his scent alone made everything in him wanna claim him. The Omega was power-bottoming him like his cock was made for him and the Alpha couldn’t take his eyes off him. Creamy white skin, rosy pink and sweat smooth, hair wild and undoubtedly sexed out, mouth open and moaning, making sounds that ran to Dean’s core and those damn azure blue eyes, swallowed his very soul. 

Dean’s words washed over him and Castiel slowed down so his climax could rip through him, sending thrill after shivering thrill of blissfulness over every inch of his being as he exploded all over Dean’s stomach, throwing his head back screaming. Dean sat up and wrapped his arms around Cas, fucking up into him, multiplying his orgasm tenfold. 

Castiel was completely wrecked as he collapsed against Dean’s shoulder when the Alpha’s release followed. “Fuck! Fuck…” Dean grunted as his body spasm.

 They fell onto the bed, both exhausted and completely sedated from the sexcapade. They laid there, panting, catching their breaths in the too hot room, staring wide eyed at the ceiling, both reveling in the fact that they just had best sex of their lives. 

“You’re incredible, you know that?” Dean said between breaths as he removed the come filled condom from his almost flaccid cock. He tied the end and dropped it into the trash by the bed. “Serious hip skills, Cas.” The Omega snorted at the compliment. 

Castiel looked at Dean who was giving him a huge, goofy, satisfied grin and the Omega couldn’t resist the urge that pulled at him to roll over and cuddle up against Dean. The Alpha wordlessly wrapped his arm around him, keeping him close as both of their heartbeats thumped in unison as they calmed. 

The Omega absently ran his fingers over Dean’s muscled chest and defined abs, feather light touches when a sudden shudder ran through both of them from the aftershock of their intense orgasms. Dean groaned while Castiel whimpered, rubbing his face against the Alpha’s shoulder. He eyed the Alpha’s tattoo over his heart, tracing the pattern with his nails, sending added chills through Dean’s heated skin.

They were sticky and gross yet neither wanted to move as sleep pulled at them.

  **-.-.-.-.-.-**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A VERY BIG SHOUTOUT TO THE WONDERFUL XHARUKA17X FOR HELPING OUT WITH THE SMUT SCENE. I CAN DO A LOT OF THINGS AS A WRITER BUT SINCE MY SEX WRITING SKILLS ARE 14 OUT OF 100, I HAD TO GO TO AN EXPERT FOR HELP AND I COULDN'T THANK THIS LOVELY PERSON ENOUGH. GO AND READ HER STORIES IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY. THEY ARE AMAZEBALLS.
> 
>  
> 
> Before you jump on my bones about how this was out of the blue. Let me just say that this was all part of the plan. Dean and Cas were planned to sleep together in the first few chapters because a good chunk of the story, especially the angst, revolves around their little fling and it becomes a big part of the fic. Not gonna say why, but it is very important, for Dean's side mostly. So them sleeping together this chapter was totally planned since the moment I typed the first word and if it seemed sudden, I am sorry, really I am. I hope I can make up for it with the plot that follows.  
> I cannot express my gratitude to all the followers this story has gained. I hope I don't disappoint after this.  
> Please tell me what you think for this chapter since it's quite nerve wrecking.
> 
> The fanart was done by me, please follow my blog for more and again, thank you so much for giving this story the attention it needs :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A very big shout out to my new Beta Angie! She's great and I want to thank her for her help :)

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**Chapter 6**

It happened every time Castiel had sex. He would dream about him; about what he did to him. The ways he would degrade him…

“ _No…Please, Michael, stop. Stop_!”

The memory had stopped, his brain blocked out the worst of it. However, no matter how hard he tried, the sounds never went away. All the begging he did remained and replayed in his head over and over…

“ _C’mon, Cas, just be a good little bitch for your Alpha_.”

“ _No, stop, please! Michael, no_!”

“ _Stay…still, Castiel…you’ll like it. You always do, you want this. You’re just a little cock slut for me. Stop struggling…Remember who you belong to now, honey. I will ruin you. Everyone will know you’re mine, and mine only_.”

He’d wake up the moment he heard himself screaming. Castiel was used to it, that he no longer awaked afraid and with the paranoia that maybe the new life he created was all a fantasy and he was still by Michael’s bedside. 

Instead he was lying alone on his own mattress, sunk into the memory foam, and covered by the thick blanket Dean had pulled over them the night before. He yawned and stretched; he hadn’t felt so good yet tired in such a long time; much less had sex so enjoyable that he actually wanted to cuddle up all morning. 

If only the Alpha had still been there. He was disappointed by his absence as he ran his hand over the empty space. His side of the bed was cool and empty, it made the Omega wonder how long it’d been since he left. 

Cas stood from him bed, his legs a little sore from the other night, and he took the sheets with him to the bathroom. He really needed take a shower and clean himself of the sweat and cum. 

Somehow, he still felt heated from his little session with Dean, that he hoped the cool water of the filling bathtub would help him. It did, but he was not expecting to stay there for longer than fifteen minutes. 

Yet there he was, with his knees against his chest, and his head resting on the aqua tiled wall. He had no idea what it was about Dean, but it was driving him crazy that he couldn’t get a read on Dean. The Alpha was smarter than he made himself appear. 

Castiel felt guilty for using him as his little hookup go-to in case he couldn’t find anyone else, but the call of his ex-boyfriend, Gadreel, pushed him to step over that boundary. The moment he looked into those green eyes, all of his morals, or at least what remained of them, were thrown out the window and an invisible connection surged him to kiss the incredibly attractive Dean Winchester.

The echo of his front door shutting close, took him out of his mind palace and back into the reality of the world. Cas stood up and got out of his tub, dried himself quickly, and dressed even faster to investigate the sound. He knew it was stupid of him to walk towards the sound, but he had so much paranoia haunting him, that he had little experience dealing with it. 

As he neared closer to the door of his bedroom, he caught the scent and sound of sizzling butter. He furrowed his eyebrows and slowly, opened the door. 

He didn’t know what surprised him most, Dean Winchester standing in his apartment again or Dean Winchester cooking. Either or, Castiel was very glad to see him there. If his pride hadn’t stopped him, he probably would’ve run into his arms. 

“Hey, good morning, sleeping beauty.” Dean grinned up to him as he searched his cabinets for a cutting board. 

“What are you still doing here?” His voice came off as a tidbit defensive, “I thought you’d be gone by now.”

“Well, I was, but I didn’t think you’d want that. Most Omegas don’t…Do you like omelets, or scrambled eggs...?” Dean reached into a plastic bag and showed him a few more items, “I also got some blueberries and chocolate chips for pancakes, if you prefer that…You know, for an Omega, you don’t keep a lot of food in your kitchen…”

“I’m not like the other Omegas.”

“So you’ve told me. But, I mean, food is kind of a necessity.” Dean stated. He commenced cutting vegetables and ham and placing them inside a small pan. The delicious smell of homemade food, taking over him and bringing him back to the days when he was younger. His mother used to cook for him and his siblings all the time.

“I usually get takeout.” Cas scanned the items that Dean bought, “Did you bring any fruit?” He questioned, grabbing the blueberries. Even if he was in the mood for strawberries and apples with honey. 

Dean looked into some bags that were on the floor, “I’m pretty sure I brought plenty of things for you to eat. The Omega lady at the market gave me a discount because she wanted to fuck me on the spot.” He laughed. God, if Cas didn’t find it so charming…

“I don’t blame her.”

“That’s because you’ve already slept with me, so you know how good I am.” The Alpha smirked, “But, yeah, I bought fruit as well, you just have to find it.”

“Dean, you really didn’t have to buy all of this. I’ll pay you back for it.”

“You really don’t need to. I don’t mind.”

“Are you…” Castiel paused, “Genuinely this nice to random Omegas you sleep with?”

The Alpha thought about it for a moment, making the Omega frown, “I don’t usually sleep around a lot. Especially not after my quick promotions at work that forcefully married me to it. My mom taught me to always be respectful and worshipping of Omegas.”

Okay, that was sweet, “I’m the only Omega of my family.”

Dean was too concentrated on mixing the eggs with spices inside a bowl, to look at Castiel, “How does that happen?” He poured the mixture into the pan. 

Cas shrugged, “It just does. My mom is a Beta, and my dad an Alpha, both coming from families of a strong lineage of Alphas and Betas, no Omegas in sight.”

“That you know of.”

“No, it’s been pretty much confirmed. That’s why me presenting as one was a really big shocker, because there’s no way that it could’ve happened.” He admired the way Dean handled the omelet with ease; had Cas done it, and he would’ve gotten it all over himself. “It’s rare to see and Alpha cook.”

“That was also thanks to my mom. She didn’t want us to be completely useless and dependable of Omegas like my grandad was, so she showed my brother and I a few basic things to be able to live on our own.” 

“You have a brother?”

He nodded, “Yeah, an Alpha just like me. His name is Sam. You got any siblings?”

“Four. Bartholomew, Anna, Inias, all Alphas, and Rachel a Beta.”

“Are you the youngest?”

He shook his head, “Second youngest. Anna is the youngest.”

“And she presented as Alpha?”

“Mhmm.”

“That sucks.”

“It gets worse from there.” He didn’t contribute further. He liked having Dean around, but he didn’t feel comfortable with telling him his life story. “Is that for you?” Castiel pointed at the finishing omelet. 

Dean smiled at the way Cas drooled over the food, “It’s yours if you want it.” He searched for a plate and fork and served the meal on top of it, “If you don’t like it, I understand.”

Castiel dug into it rapidly, barely savoring the sweet ham and creamy cheese combining perfectly with the egg and butter. It felt good to taste something made in his kitchen rather than a greasy restaurant stove. “This is really good.”

A smug grin spread across his lips, “You’re welcome.”

He couldn’t get enough of it, and the more he ate, the less words he could use to describe that wonderful flavor, “Your mother taught you well.”

“I also know how to make lunch and dinner. If you’re open for me to stay here for that long, of course.”

“Don’t you have a life?” Cas teased. 

“I mean, I do, but there’s nowhere else I’d rather be than here with you.” His hand found Cas’ cheek and he caressed it, like a man would to his mate. His gesture made the Omega laugh a little.

Well, that was cheesy. “Is this some type of joke?”

Dean chuckled, “In the beginning, sure…”

“Don’t get too comfortable around me, Dean. What happened last night was a one-time deal. Nothing more than a meaningless…” He stopped when Dean’s smile faded and he proceeded with correcting himself, “nothing more than…” Shit. What the hell was he supposed to say? The sex was insignificant to him, but clearly not to Dean. 

That bright grin on Dean’s façade appeared again, “Nah, it’s alright, Cas, I get it.”

“I didn’t mean to be such a tool about it.”

“No! Like I said, it’s fine. You’re right…The fact that we slept together last night means nothing now. It’s exactly as you meant to say.” Dean grabbed a pair of eggs and cracked them into the pan, “Finish up.”

“I didn’t want to upset you.” The last thing he wanted was to apologize. He had never done it before with other Alphas, he didn’t want to do so with this one, “I’m just not used to having anyone sleep around and then stay the following morning. I appreciate that you have, but there was no need to.”

“I only stayed because I thought you would’ve wanted me to.” He added some pepper to the eggs. He wanted for them to cook properly so that he could turn them over. “If you didn’t, then you should’ve told me last night and I would’ve woken up in my apartment instead.”

Castiel squinted, “Are you guilt tripping me, Dean?”

“You just made me feel like shit for spending the night, I think I’m entitled for getting back at you.” 

The Omega pushed his plate away, his appetite gone, “You’re not entitled to anything. What? Is it because you’re an Alpha that you get to decide what I feel and what you can do to get back at me for it?”

“Don’t get too riled up, all I wanted was to be here with you because I like you!” 

He chose to ignore the confession, “You don’t know me.”

“You don’t know me either, yet here we are, the morning after we fucked.”

Cas scoffed, “Do you have any idea what a one-night stand is?”

Dean stayed quiet then sighed, “I’ll leave in a little bit, don’t worry about it.” He turned the stove off, “I’ll get my stuff and get out of your hair.”

The green eyed beauty made a pouty face that started to eat at Castiel’s wolf, and it told him not to fall for it because the Alpha was drowning him in fault, “You don’t have to go. I would like to have you around for longer because…” He gulped, “I like you, too, Dean. But not romantically, before you get the wrong idea.” Although, he wasn’t quite sure of that.

The million-dollar smile made its comeback, having a bigger effect on him than the last time, “I can always work with that.”

“Do you not have anyone to go back to? Your brother, at least, or a kid? Why would you want to spend time with me?”

Dean grabbed Cas’ hands, intertwining their fingers together, sending sensations throughout Castiel’s body. He’d never felt this way before, not even with his ex Gadreel, “I want to get to know you. It’s silly now, but I’m very interested in you and would like to take you out sometime.” 

“Dean…”

“Please. It’s weird now, I know, but allow me to spend the day with you to get to know you better—”

For a moment, he couldn’t breathe. His heartbeat was working twice than what it usually did, “I would love that,” He interrupted. 

“Great. Then, eat up, and we’ll get started.” Dean winked and Cas felt ridiculous for smiling at him like an idiot. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was short but I hope you like it! Please read and comment!


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

Cas wasn’t sure what Dean’s concept of getting to know him was, but the last thing the Omega wanted was to spend the day still in his apartment, with a large box of pizza on top of his coffee table, and Alpha Dean next to him.

“You can barely see any of the bread.” Dean joked as he grabbed a slice of the meaty pizza.

“I like it when my pizza has a bunch of stuff.” Cas devoured his piece in one siting and was already reaching for the second one. 

Dean chuckled, “Might as well order a meal, if that’s the case.”

“You were the one that wanted pizza, your mistake was letting me choose how I wanted it.”

“At least I know one thing about you.” Dean smiled at Castiel.

 They spent time talking about what they liked and hated about the office and the people they barely tolerated, but never brought up anything about themselves like they initially intended to until Dean suggested pizza. 

“So,” Dean started with a mouthful, “What brought you to Bellevue?”

Castiel swallowed, “I have a nasty habit of running away from my problems. Both literally and emotionally.” 

“What was it that time?”

“My ex-boyfriend.”

“Is he the one that…” Dean gestured at the noticeable mating marks on Cas’ neck. 

“Oh, no, no, that wasn’t his work. Although he provoked as much damage as the one who did. This one, Gadreel, enamored me with his charm and then let it die over something I had no control of. He blamed all of these…” Cas touched the scar on his wrist, “…on me. The night I overheard his plans on leaving me, was the night I packed my stuff and left, accidentally finding a place in Bellevue, instead of my initial location: Seattle.”

 “Why did you stop here?”

“Because nobody wondered about me. It was as if I was part of them all along. I didn’t stand out because I was Omega. I don’t look like one, but someone always manages to notice, even with the suppressants. When I broke it off with Gadreel, I realized that it was the only thing I could do well. Running away was my thing, and Bellevue made me feel like a belonged.”

“That’s good. It’s not always easy finding somewhere to belong, especially when you’re used to being on the run all the time.” Dean nodded understandingly, “I know a thing or two about that.”

“Can you tell me?”

“Prefer not to.”

The Omega scoffed, “That’s not fair. I told you about my ex, the least I deserve is a little background on _your_ story.”

“It’s nothing important.” Dean tried to dismiss it, but Cas wasn’t having it. “Seriously, Cas.”

“If it’s embarrassing, I won’t laugh. I promise.”

“No, it’s not that.”

“Then?”

The Alpha finally huffed and said, “I had a girlfriend back home in Kansas. I loved her with all my heart, but the moment she asked me to mate her—we were about seventeen—I picked an internship in Seattle with Cain Marks, instead of staying with her like she had begged me to. I wasn’t ready to have a mate, the idea wasn’t completely settled on my wolf yet, so I ran away to avoid the responsibility she wanted to weigh over me.”

“That wasn’t so bad…” Castiel mumbled.

“Maybe not to you. To me, it’s uncomfortable because I’m an Alpha, and I have to settle down with the Omega that wants me, not leave them over a job.”

“Dean, times have changed. I’ve told my brother so many times that the roles of the Alphas, Betas, and Omegas are different now, and there’s no longer a need to stand by the morals expected of us. Do you have any idea how many Alphas and Betas I’ve slept with? If I told anyone fifty years ago, they probably would’ve put a collar around me attached to a leash, and force a punishment upon me to make sure I never do it again. It’s the same thing with Alphas. Nobody expects you to settle down so quickly. You were young, and so was she, so what the hell did you guys know about love? There’s millions of other Omegas that could be your perfect match.”

“You’re right.”

“I try to live by those type of thoughts, because I have nobody to remind me.”

Dean inched closer, “I could be useful for that.”

“Nice try, Winchester, but we’re not there yet.”

“C’mon, Cas, we slept together. I think we’re past formalities.”

“We agreed to spend time to get to know each other.” Castiel warned, “I was hoping that you’d be able to keep your side of the deal as I am doing to mine.”

“Fine.” Dean raised his hands in defeat, “What else do you want to know about me?”

“Why are you so interested in me? I know I don’t look like other Omegas, but there has to be something more. You were chasing after me even before you knew what I was.” He stayed quiet momentarily, “I remember you keeping an eye on me as if I was a newly discovered species.”

The Alpha laughed, his booming voice filling up the room, “I was weird, but you can’t blame me, Cas. How do you expect me to react around a guy with no scent? The whole office wanted to get a piece of you, and I was the only one to get the closest encounter.”

“What are you talking about? You bumped into me and didn’t apologize for it.”

“It was a dick move of me, I’ll admit that, but I can also say that after that, I couldn’t get you out of my mind.”

Cas crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow, “Why’s that?”

“Look at you! You’re attractive! It’s hard not looking at you! Just having you right here makes me want to drool.”

A large grin spread on Cas’ face and tried searching for something else that wasn’t Dean, because he knew that the moment he stared into those mesmerizing green eyes, he’d fall for the Alpha all over again, and his blush would be totally noticeable. 

“You should smile more, it suits you.” He heard Dean comment. 

“I don’t usually have many reasons to do so.”

“Please, I can give you plenty.”

“I’m sure you can.” There were feelings pooling in his stomach, beautiful, careless sensations he’d never felt before, or that he knew he was capable of forming. Cas felt something similar once for Gadreel, but it wasn’t as big or strong, or even near what he sensed then. 

“Hey,” Dean gingerly touched his lap, “Later on tonight, you wanna go out somewhere? I know this great place you may enjoy.”

Castiel responded softly with a nod, “Yes, of course.”

**-.-.-.-.-.-**

“You have contacts everywhere, and this is the best recommendation you could get?” Castiel asked as Dean lead him inside a bar crowded with people. This place was supposed to be the best of Bellevue, according to the Alpha, but the more Castiel looked at it, the less appeal there was to support that statement. 

“It’s not bad. A friend of my dad’s owns the place, so he could give us a discount on the drinks.”

“He better. I haven’t had a drink in like two years.” Oh, yes, he remembered that phase of his life where his situation with Michael had turned him into an alcoholic. He left the booze for his own good, but occasionally had sips of beer. Last time it happened was during a New Year’s party that his old work colleagues invited him to. 

“I’m sure he will. Rufus is like another father figure to me.” Dean lead him to a booth near the wall, right under the sign that had the name of the bar. “Is this place okay?” He asked Castiel, which, really, was a first. Not many Alphas asked for their companion’s say-so if they were of a lower rank.

“It’s fine.” Cas took his side of the booth and watched as Dean took the other one. 

“What type of drink guy are you?” Dean asked, grabbing the display card that showed that month’s special.

“Like, what drink I prefer?”

“Yeah.”

Castiel thought about it briefly, “I don’t really have one. It all depends on how I’m feeling for the day. If I had to choose, then I guess I’d get a fireball shot or beer.”

“A fireball shot?”

“Cinnamon schnapps and Tabasco sauce, yes.”

“I know what it is.” Dean laughed, “It’s just a strong, spicy drink.”

“You don’t think an Omega can handle it?”

“I’ve never seen one survive it.” 

“Is that a challenge?” Castiel smirked. “If that’s the case, bring me two shots.”

“Oh, two now?”

Cas nodded. 

Dean smiled and stood up, winking at Cas before departing to his destination. 

Man, the way the Betas and Omegas admired him was unbelievable. Their eyes worshipped him like a God, admiring the deity that the Winchester Alpha was. Dean was a dream come true to many, and the fact that he was spending his time with Cas after a night of hot sex, gave his confidence a little kick.

It didn’t take long before someone approached him. Dean was only gone for less than a minute. The Alpha male was tall and exaggeratedly muscular, that it seemed as if his tight tee could barely hold in all the muscle of the man. 

Shit. 

That could only mean that he forgot to take his suppressants and his trail was floating around. His time with Dean distracted him enough to make him overlook he needed at least one pill to make it through the day. 

He had a goofy grin stuck to his face, his eyes eating the athletic figure that Castiel was while holding his drink tightly and licking his lips. “What’s a pretty face like yours doing in a place like this all alone?”

“I’m not alone, actually.”

“Right? Who’s with you? Your brother? Friend? _Mate_?” Even with the sight of his bite scars clear, the idiot couldn’t get the message that Cas was off limits. 

“I’m off the market, asshole.”

“Oooh, you got quite the mouth there, Omega. You should know better than to talk to me like that. Perhaps I should punish you for it.” Jesus. 

Where the hell was Dean and why was he taking so long? Not that he needed him, but the last thing he wanted to deal with that night was a knot head Alpha that couldn’t keep it in his pants. “All that muscle, and you still wouldn’t be able to handle this.”

The guy moved closer, “We could always give it a try.”

“No thank you.”

“Come on, Omega.” The man’s hand suddenly took a hold of Castiel’s arm and brought him up. He could see the shock in the brute’s dark brown at how tall Cas was. Wouldn’t be the first time it happened, and that moment certainly wasn’t the last. “Stop playing hard to get.”

Those words were his trigger. He heard them before with Michael, who loved to use them whenever he forced himself on Cas. He felt his hands closing into fists, ready to put his fighting skills to the test.

The stranger Alpha pulled Cas close, pressing their bodies together, and whispering, “You’ll like it sugar, I can guarantee that.”

His final boundary had been crossed, and Castiel used all of his strength, which was surprisingly a lot, to push the other man away, making him almost tip over another couple’s table. The Alpha’s face said a lot. There was embarrassment (because Castiel was an Omega and his drink coated his shirt and jeans) anger, (again, because Castiel was an Omega), and astonishment (You guessed it: because Cas was an Omega). The folks around had similar reactions. 

Castiel spotted Dean still by the bar, holding his shots and a tall glass of beer, looking their way but not moving when the beefy Alpha grabbed Castiel by his shirt, and through gritted teeth recited, “You have no idea who you’re fucking with.”

“Neither do you.” Castiel spat at him and brought his knee up as hard as he could to slam against the asshole’s balls, and took a step back when the Alpha let go of his jacket to screech in pain. 

If there was one good thing that came out of dating Gadreel was his ability to pass on his self-defense lessons, so he tested them and let his fist fly at the Alpha’s face, his eyes catching blood spurting from the man’s nose after the impact. 

His knuckles ached after the first hit because his fighting had become as rusty as his drinking, but that still didn’t make him stop at just one punch. He kept going, and once the grunting Alpha was lying on the ground, trying to get the Omega to stop hitting him, Castiel straddled his wide waist and continued his hits, each harder than the last. 

Cas heard footsteps behind him, probably the men that the coward underneath him called out for through a bloodied mouth, which he completely ignored, and two pairs of hands held him harshly and pulled him away. All eyes were on him, even a set of familiar jade ones. Probably the only ones not reflecting fear…

  Castiel’s vision had been blurred by his repressed anger that he forgot that he was still with Dean Winchester. His animalistic side has taken over him and turned him into someone he barely recognized. 

The Alpha’s companions held him, both of them Betas, but Castiel did not allow himself to surrender without putting up a fight again, and he elbowed their stomachs, scratched at their wrists and arms, and attempted to bite their hands whenever they neared his mouth. He’d forgotten how good it felt to have adrenaline pumping through his body until they eventually they got a good grasp of him, and the feeling faded rapidly. 

From the rage that boiled off the Alpha’s face, Cas predicted what was coming next, would not have the ending he expected.

Fortunately, enough, the hits never came, because someone had tackled the other Alpha and the stench of a furious wolf reached his nose. Dean had taken the man and slammed him on the ground, finishing what Castiel started. 

Dean’s punches were stronger, like a hammer against a thick block of ice, and they had a bigger impact than Cas’, leaving the knot-headed Alpha’s face bloodier and nearly unrecognizable.

Castiel’s wolf told him that he didn’t need Dean to stand up for him, much less take care of the douche when he obviously had it under control, but the same voice told his pride that this might’ve been a good call on his behalf. Who knows how far the Alpha would’ve taken it if Dean hadn’t intervened. 

The Betas let go of him, allowing him to run towards Dean, and clutching his arms. Cas could feel Dean’s skin vibrating with fury, and his Omega instincts went into work, making his arms wrap around the angry Alpha.

“Dean. I’m fine.”

Dean yanked at Castiel from his waist, his nose burying into his messy hair, scenting him. He remained that way for a while, taking in the aroma of cinnamon and apples. His breathing slowed, his skin cooled, and his stench of pine trees and coffee softened. 

“Thank you, Cas.”

“You’re hurt.” The Omega noted the small injury on his cheekbone. His wolf was ready to go back to the feud, but the Alpha and his goons were now out the door. “We should probably go back home. I’ll try to fix that.”

Green eyes met with blue and a sheepish smile appeared on Dean’s lips, “Yeah, that would be great.”

The crowds divided, giving the duo space to walk through, none of them willing to test their strength. Castiel felt good about having that effect on people, because then they’d know better than to fuck with Omegas. 

Their drive had been quiet, both of them analyzing what just happened in that bar, but not sharing their thoughts with each other. Castiel kept thinking about the way Dean jumped in to defend him. His arrogance fought him in a debate on whether he needed the Alpha or not. 

At his apartment, Cas had Dean sit on his couch, and went on to analyze the injuring on his forehead. “So, where did you learn how to fight?”

Castiel chuckled because he knew that question would come up eventually. “My ex-boyfriend was a self-defense teacher and he taught me a lot of things. He would remind me about using the upper hand I was gifted with, which is my bigger body, so I don’t struggle with pinning someone down.”

“Yeah, I know that from experience.” Dean joked. 

“Stop it.”

“You were really good out there, though. Honestly, it turned me on. You looked really hot beating the shit out of that guy.” Dean watched Castiel’s movements carefully, trying to figure out what either of them would do next. 

“You didn’t have to intervene. I could have handled it myself. I’m grateful that you did, don’t get me wrong, but I really had it under control.”

“Clearly.”

“I did.”

“I know.”

“Then why—”

“As much as I tried to tell my wolf that you could do it, because you did give a good ass beating to that son of a bitch, it didn’t want me to let them hurt you. Whether you had it or not, I couldn’t let them touch you.”

Every time Dean spoke that way, it left him speechless. Did he mean that? Those words were only heard on mates and him and Dean were…well, not that. Friends, sure. Anything else…? No. 

His words only made his feelings betray him again, because he felt that familiar warmth creep up on him, and bags of butterflies exploding in his insides, turning and flapping wildly. Dean had that effect on him. Then only thing he could do was stay quiet as a response. 

The Alpha was giving him that look again, making him feel like he could devour him with the gaze alone. Dean leaned towards him, lips twitching in a half smirk. 

“Can I?” The Alpha’s husky voice caressed Castiel’s face as he pointedly flicked his jade green eyes between Castiel’s sky blue eyes and his lips. 

He hated to admit it, but Dean’s heat and closeness rendered him unable to do anything but give a short, quick nod. Dean didn’t hesitate in sealing his lips into a soft kiss. The feel of his lover’s tongue teasing his bottom lip had him sighing against him and Dean deepened the kiss. His hands came up to caress Castiel’s face and sank his fingers into his dark unruly hair as his tongue mapped out the Omega’s mouth possessively. The kiss was filled with desire and bordered on filthy as Dean licked into his mouth and Castiel found himself latching on to it, sucked on Dean’s tongue and gaining a growled out moan from the Alpha. 

Dean pulled him onto his lap, quickly resuming his assault on Castiel’s plush pink lips. Want and need swirled deep in the lowest of Castiel’s stomach. Dean’s hands were running up and down his back, sliding under his shirt in favor of kneading his fingers into his skin, the touch electric, making Castiel pull at Dean’s short hair. They fought for dominance over the kiss, quiet snarls in between teasing and hungry nips at each other’s lips. Dean took a grip of the back of Castiel’s neck in order to lick and suck teethed bruises into the Omega’s neck as they grinded they hips against each other, both desperately seeking the delicious friction their clothed cocks needed.

Castiel’s body was on fire, Dean’s ministrations were making him leak slick, staining his briefs. The Omega had no doubts his lover could smell him. Dean nipped at his collar bones as he thrusted his hips upwards to meet Castiel’s downward thrusts. The wetness made it so much better, he whined as he felt Dean’s dick rub against his own. 

The Alpha growled and blew out a breath before he suddenly gripped Castiel’s firm ass tightly and stood all in one motion. The Omega wrapped his legs around the Alpha’s waist as he sucked at Dean’s bottom lip, making him groan as he thoughtlessly made his way towards the bedroom. 

Cas squeezed his legs around the Alpha’s waist as he reached the bed. Dean took Castiel’s face in his hands and kissed him deeply, refusing to release the warmth of his mouth. They fought for control again as Castiel pawed at their shirts as Dean’s knees landed on the bed. Dean quickly moved to work with him to rid each other of their clothes as Castiel pulled him in for another fierce kiss, making Dean growl. The Alpha groped his bare ass, sending more slick easing down Castiel’s thighs. 

“I want you to knot me, Dean.” The Omega whined, tilting his head back as Dean ran his teeth against his sensitive neck. His whole body was humming, his hole was pulsing, needing to be filled. Needing to be fucked and knotted. 

Castiel bit Dean’s lip once more, hard enough to gain a snarl from the Alpha who was grasping his hair in a firm grip while leaving fingerprint contusions on his hips. Castiel released the Alpha’s lip and Dean growled, low and dangerous. 

The Omega suddenly found himself being spun around and shoved face first into the mattress by Dean’s left hand on his head while his ass was held up high and presented. His heart was beating madly against his ribcage as the Alpha’s breath ghosted against his neck. Castiel whimpered, he didn’t care how needy he looked, he wanted Dean’s dick inside him. 

The hand that had been on his head retreated was roughly pushing his legs wider apart. Dean’s fingers played in his slick, circling his dripping wet hole, enticing him to fill it. Two fingers slid easily into the Omega and Castiel moaned. 

He wanted more because it wasn’t enough and he bit his bottom lip as Dean nipped at his right shoulder. He didn’t have time to think the Alpha nuzzled the back of his hair and his fingers were suddenly gone. The fat, blunt head of Dean’s cock pushed into him. Castiel hissed as he was slowly being stretched, loving every second, making spasms of chilled pleasured dance up his spine and down all the way to his toes as the Alpha bottomed out, hips flushed against his ass. 

Dean didn’t give him long to adjust to his impressive girth and length and was snapping his hips deeply into him. Castiel fisted the bed sheets as Dean started a harsh and primal pace, making him moan, loud and needy. The Omega leaned his head back as the Alpha’s body covered him, hovering as Dean kept fucking into him, fast and hard as he nipped and kissed at Castiel’s shoulders. He spread his legs as wide as he could, making the Alpha’s thrusts sink in deeper and hitting his prostate just right. Castiel cried out a high pitched mewl. 

The room was hot and their bodies glistened in sweat as Dean grinded his hips into him, pulled Castiel’s face up by the neck to lick into his mouth. The Omega reached back with his right hand and took a firm grip of Dean’s hair, pulling and demanding as the Alpha fucked him deep and hard. 

Castiel’s mantras of ‘ _yes! yes! Fuck me! oh!_ ’ in sync with the loud sweaty sounds of skin slapping skin. Dean licked at his neck, feeling Cas close as his hole tightened around his cock. 

“Are you sure you want this? Huh, you want me to knot you, Cas?” Dean’s voice was like thunder, all Alpha tone, ready to howl. 

“Yes, please, fucking knot me already!” Castiel didn’t care if he sounded like a begging bitch in heat, he wanted to feel complete. Wanted. 

Their bodies slid against each other through the heavy scent of sex, Alpha musk and his own slick made him wild as Dean fucked into him, body flushed against him, holding him with bruised grips. The Omega yanked at the Alpha’s hair, silently demanding his knot, unable to do anything but moan and pant. 

Dean groaned against his neck and Castiel could fell the knot starting to swell and catch at his rim. The anticipation of being knotted like a good little Omega was making him cry out and salivate until Dean finally shoved his knot passed the tight muscles and then slammed himself into his lover, locking them together as Castiel screamed his release into the room, voice echoing off the walls while Dean groaned and gasped as he came, holding on to Castiel’s hips. 

Castiel was completely wrecked, his legs trembling and spread wide as he let go of Dean’s hair and sunk into the bed, pulling the Alpha with him. Dean took in a few deep breaths, his heart erratic and wild under his chest. He gathered Castiel in his arms and moved them to lay on the sides so he would crush the boneless Omega.

Castiel had never felt so safe and as complete as he did the moment he lay his head on Dean's chest  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A VERY BIG THANK YOU TO XHARUKA17X AGAIN FOR HELPING WITH THE SMUT SCENE FOR THIS CHAPTER. I COULDN'T HAVE DONE THIS WITHOUT HER. 
> 
> With that out of the way >:^) I can't wait for the next chapter because that's where I'm gonna start throwing the angst punches. 
> 
> I hope you guys liked this chapter because it was fun to write, especially the bar scene. 
> 
> Please read and comment!
> 
> PS: LISTEN TO THIS SONG FOR THE SMUT SCENE  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PbSZhGONRBg


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

As soon as Castiel stepped into the building, people noticed the different glow surrounding him. He didn’t look as tense, or as frustrated as he usually did when he signed in, and his arms weren’t flooded with papers that he desperately wanted to hold together, instead they were neatly organized in a binder inside his tan leather satchel.  

For the first time in what felt like forever, Cas felt different. Relieved. Satisfied. Two unalike feelings that never got along. His lower back and ass were still a little sore however, and gave him some trouble when he was walking, but nothing too severe to erase the wonderful memory of Dean pounding into him and kissing as if they were they only people remaining on Earth. 

It took him a while to fathom that his blissful expressions were showing on his face. The one to point it out was Gabriel, who made a crude comment the instant he sat down. “You look…sexed out.”

“Wow, you’re blunt.”

“It’s totally noticeable.” Gabriel glued his eyes to Castiel’s posture analyzing the man from head to toe, “So, were you a giver or a receiver?”

Cas turned on his computer, “That’s none of your damn business.” 

“We’re friends, so it’s totally my business.”

“I never said we were friends.” Castiel clarified and he spotted the hurt in the Omega’s eyes, so he backtracked, “I mean, we could be if you respect my privacy.”

“I just like to believe that the concept of friendship means sharing stories with each other. Like…who you slept with? I won’t tell anybody if that’s your concern.”

“Honestly, I can’t take your word for that.” He confessed, “I know that you’re somewhat trustful, but like I said, this is my personal life. Who I sleep with, should only be my concern.” 

“You can’t even tell me what they were? Are you into Omega women or men?” Shit, if only he knew. “I don’t judge.” He would if he knew that the guy Cas slept with _twice_ was Alpha Dean Winchester. 

Castiel cleared his throat, “What I _can_ say, is that it was a guy, but that’s as far as I’m willing to take it. I would prefer if you didn’t ask anything else.”

“You’re such a tease Cas, it makes you interesting…” Gabriel smiled at him, “Seriously though, what were they? Beta? Omega?”

“Stop it.”

“C’mon.”

He shook his head, “No.”

“Pretty please?”

“I said no.”

“Cassie…”

Castiel sighed when he heard the horrendous nickname. He decided that if he didn’t tell Gabriel that who they slept with was an Alpha, he would never stop. “Fine. It was an Alpha.”

Gabriel’s eyes went wide, “Seriously? What’s his name? Where did you meet? Does that make you a Beta? Are you a Beta? Because you…you can’t be an Omega.”

“I’m gonna stop you right there. I already said too much and I would rather leave everything where it is now, because I don’t want to open up door I shouldn’t. So, do me a favor, and don’t ask anything else, okay? I’m having a really good day, and I don’t want to ruin it.”

“Okay, I get it.”

“Don’t tell anyone. It’s hard enough as it is to keep things to myself…don’t make it worse.”

“I won’t, I promise.”

“Thank you.” Cas sighed in relief, “Now, if you could let me do my work, that’d be great.” He was about to start typing his password into his computer, when he suddenly felt someone stand behind him. Castiel tried not to smile at that delicious scent of pine trees and coffee, mixed with expensive cologne. Gabriel pretended to look busy. 

“Actually, Mr. Novak, before you get started.” Dean announced, “I need to talk to you about the report you emailed to me last night. I wanted to go through some of the corrections you’ve made.” 

Castiel slowly stood up, “Yes, of course, Mr. Winchester.” He answered politely, attempting to look civil around him, but his legs almost gave away the desperation in wanting to wrap themselves around Dean. 

“Good, come with me to my office then.” Dean didn’t wait for Cas to stand and started walking away. Other employees turned their way, giving Cas eyes of pity, as if he’d gotten in trouble and was about to get scolded for it.

Cas followed behind Dean with small steps, pretending as if the guy in front of him fucked him crazy the other night and actually knotted him. Maybe that’s why he was feeling all bubbly inside, because the bond they formed, was too overwhelming to contain. 

Dean opened the door of his office and allowed Cas inside first. 

The Omega heard the lock click behind him and a pair of arms pulled him close, “I like it when you call me Mr. Winchester.” Dean whispered against his ear. “It’s very hot when you say it.”

Castiel turned around to snake his arms around Dean’s neck, “You couldn’t stay away from me, could you?” 

“Oh, I totally could, but I didn’t. You were looking especially exquisite this morning.” Dean grinned down at Castiel before he leaned in to kiss him. “The moment I saw you again, I knew you’d be in my mind all day.”

“Is this why you called me over to your office? People may get a little suspicious.” Cas nipped at his lips. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt this type of happiness. Well, he could, but it wasn’t as much as this.

“Actually, I wanted to talk to you about something.”

“Is it bad?” His suspicion started to kick at him, and Cas hated it. He seriously needed to work on that…

“No, not really.”

“Go ahead.”

“I just came back from a super boring meeting, and to make it up to me, Cain gave me two reservations to this five-star restaurant. I want you to come with me so we could use that as our first, real date.”

Cas raised an eyebrow, “What we did yesterday didn’t count as one?”

Dean cleared his throat, “You really wanna count it? We got into a fight with another Alpha, I hardly think that counts as anything.”

“It was a fun experience!” 

“You almost got the shit beat out of you.”

“You act as if I didn’t put up a good hit on him.” 

“Look, I just really want to take you out somewhere where we’re both dressed nicely, and the restaurant is romantic or whatever. I feel like after last night…” He was referring to their knotting, “We could maybe have a decent dinner. No fighting with anyone, no drinking, and maybe no sex. I’m still holding on to the last one, because you’re really good with that. Holy shit, you seriously know how to move.”

Cas laughed, “You’re not so bad yourself.” He gave Dean a soft peck on the lips, “When do you want to do this?”

Dean thought about it, “This whole week the company’s gonna be getting some important visitors so I’m stacked with work most of it, except Friday, because Cain arranged a dinner with this top-notch businessman named Crowley, and he allowed me to have that day off.”

“But I don’t have it off.”

“I know, but we could do it after work?”

“I’m not really a date type of guy, but I’ll do it.” Castiel assured him, “What time do you want me to meet you there?”

“I’ll pick you up at around seven? You get out at five so you should have enough time to get ready, no?”

“That’s enough time, thank you.” The Omega smiled again, trying to remember the last time he ever felt so giddy over someone. His first love would always be Gadreel because he didn’t know better when they’d met and although what they had was very intense, it would never come close to what he and Dean developed. 

Dean kissed him again, this time deeper than the last, and backed away, “Did you take scent blockers?”

Cas nodded. 

“Oh, good, I was afraid I’d smell like fucked out Omega.” The Alpha teased as he undid his arms around Castiel. 

“Ha-ha. I’m the one who should be complaining since I stink of desperate Alpha.” Cas scanned his clothes to make sure that nothing was too messed up and make people pick up the wrong idea. “I’ll see you soon, hopefully, then.”

“Me too.” 

Cas hoped that he didn’t look too dreamy when he stepped out of Dean’s office. Perhaps it was because they knotted that these feelings had taken a new twist, but he was relieved that they only belonged to Dean. If he was lucky, they would last. 

For now, the only thing he could do was pretend that he and Dean had gotten into a disagreement. 

“Ugh, I smell like him.” Cas commented to Gabriel when he was close enough and faked his disgust. 

“God, I know, I caught it as soon as you walked out of his office. Don’t get me wrong, he smells nice, but only in the beginning, then it gets a little irritating.” The other Omega complained, “I have some cologne if you want some.”

“Please.” He said and his wolf kicked him, because how dare he? Dean’s scent was delicious and he needed it to make it through the day. When was the last time he smelt so good of an Alpha? 

The cologne that Gabriel lent him wasn’t that great, it was worse than he had imagined, but it was useful to keep suspicions low. 

For the rest of that day, he couldn’t stop thinking about Dean. The image of the Alpha drove him nuts at the mere thought of it. His mesmerizing green eyes, his freckled cheeks, his big, bright grin, was just enough to push him to madness. 

Cas didn’t want to call it Love though, it was far too soon for that, but these sensations had never been this strong for anyone before, and it made him hesitate his response to it. Dean could be the man he was waiting for, the one his parents should’ve made him marry instead of Michael, the one he should have fallen in love with for the first time than Gadreel. It should’ve been Dean, not them.

He knew that the Alpha felt the same way about him. Castiel could see it in him, and feel it when they made love. That type chemistry doesn’t just happen between any Alpha and Omega. Electricity like that was only for mates. 

Dean and Cas were definitely not that, but the possibility of it was still up in the air. 

Thoughts like those couldn’t be messed with, nonetheless, last time he had, Castiel ended up with the disappointment of Gadreel. The Alpha told him he loved him, treated him like he was his entire world, but the scars Castiel carried were a burden to their relationship. Gadreel stopped looking at him with the same eyes of adoration, and traded it for resentment. The image of Cas as the perfect Omega partner was traded for a tainted image. Gadreel once asked how many other men there was before him, and it was all it took for Cas to realize what his boyfriend truly saw in him. 

There was none of that with Dean. 

At least he liked to think so. 

“Hey, Cas?” Gabriel’s voice suddenly boomed into his head, when Castiel was getting ready to stand up and go to the copy room. 

“What’s up?”

“Could you pick up my report from the printer?”

“Yeah, no problem.” The blue eyed man agreed and walked away.

The copy room brought back so many memories of Dean. They weren’t any good ones, it made him laugh, but who would’ve known that those creepy stares that Dean would give him while standing by the door, would somehow end up with them knotting during a passionate night of sex?

He made his copies, a good portion of them in case the financial report got lost somehow (because it _always_ happened), and picked up Gabriel’s papers. On his way out, he made sure he had it all on his hands, but as he was counting the copies he’d made again, a woman tapped on his shoulder and he turned around to face her. 

She was too beautiful to be a part of their company. The women in the office had their charm and individual beauty, but none of them were like her. This girl, a Beta, had long, dark brown hair, dark green eyes, and an hourglass figure that many of the women glaring her way would kill for. Her features were familiar. Cas felt like he’d seen her flawless face somewhere.

“Excuse me?” Her English accent only added to her appeal. 

“Uh, yeah?” He almost stuttered. 

“Do you happen to know where Dean Winchester is?”

His jealousy made its presence known, “I’m not his secretary, so I wouldn’t know. Sorry.”

“Oh.” She pursed her lips in letdown, “I went to his office to see if he’d be there, but he’s not, and his secretary is out for lunch, so I really have no one to ask.”

Her expression of dissatisfaction made him regret his answer. “As far as I know,” and as much as Dean mentioned, “there’s been a lot of important businessmen coming in and out of the building all day, so Mr. Winchester is probably in a meeting with them right now.”

She chuckled, “That would explain all those expensive cars out there.”

Cas knew the cars she spoke about. When he got to work that morning, there was several classic models stationed up front. “Yeah, in my salary I would never be able to afford a car like that.” He joked. 

“Ah, maybe one day. You can’t always look at life on the negative side.”

“You’re right.” He uttered, “Hey, maybe, I could give Mr. Winchester your message when I see him. He’s in charge of my floor, so he’s around here a lot.”

“Thank god, I was afraid I’d have to wait until Dean’s secretary came back. I usually don’t have to wait so long to see him. My name’s Bela Talbot by the way.”

Now Cas knew where he recognized her. The Beta lawyer had billboards everywhere about her law firm and charities of Omega and Beta equality. She was the hero of many Omegas for getting their Alpha abusers into jail and fighting for equal treatment of Omegas and Betas in the work industry.

“I’m Castiel Novak.” Standing next to her, he was a nobody. 

“That’s such a pretty name. May I ask for your classification. I’ve been trying to scent you, but I’ve picked up nothing except for that gross cologne. No offense. You’re using scent blockers, I’m assuming.”

“Actually, I do mind you asking about my rank. I’m pretty private about that.”

“It’s totally understandable.” Bela smirked. “Anyways, are you sure you could give Dean my message? I don’t want to get in the way of your work.”

“Yes, I could.” He’d have to find a way to squeeze himself into Dean’s schedule but, sure, he could do it.

“Tell him that I have been trying to contact him for two days now and nobody has told me where he is. I called his brother and he has no clue where he went so I have to know where he’s been because I am beyond worried.”

The jealousy in him kept blowing up like a balloon and was ready to explode. He wasn’t the type to be possessive, but God’s sake! Dean knotted him! He was entitled to feel that way. “Are you, like, his relative or friend?”

Bela was quick to correct him, “His girlfriend…well, fiancée…but I’m still not used to seeing myself in that position yet. We’ve only been engaged for a month, but work has gotten too much into our heads that we forget sometimes.”

Castiel’s eyes went wide and his mouth dry. His hands crumbled the papers in his hands, not knowing what to do when he heard those words. He felt his heart drop and his eyes water. No. No, no, no, the world couldn’t be so cruel.

“Are you okay?” Bela touched his shoulder comfortingly.

He blinked a few times, a tear rolling down his cheek, “Yeah, I’m fine. I’ll give Dean your message. You don’t have to worry about that.”

“Thank you so much. You’re doing me a huge favor, sweetie.”

“Don’t worry.” 

“I hope to see you again, Castiel. You have this vibe on you that I like.” She winked at him and spun on her heels to gracefully sashay down the hall, turning heads her way to admire her presence. 

When she was out of sight, Cas’ heart began to pound loudly at his chest, his lungs finding new ways to choke the air out him. This couldn’t be happening to him. Not like this. He could not have gotten out of one problem to fall into an even bigger one. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please tell me what you think! Thank you to all the followers this story has gained in in little time! I hope you enjoyed this chapter!


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

Castiel was barely typing on his keyboard when his phone lit up with a new notification. He was afraid to reach for it and read it, because he was sure who it belonged to.

_**Meet me in the break room in 5. I have a break and I want to see you. -D** _

His blue eyes swelled with upcoming tears, but the growing anger that brutally murdered the butterflies that were once unleashed in his stomach earlier, held them back and forced him to reply. 

_**Okay. I want to talk to you about something. -C** _

The reply was quick. _ **I can’t wait to see you, sweetheart :) -D** _

Sweetheart. How dare he call him that through a text? Oh, but Castiel was going to rip him a new one. That was, of course, if his feelings didn’t beat him to it and ruined his plan. His head was bubbling with different emotions. 

One moment he was sad for losing Dean in the worse way, the other he was angry because the Alpha thought he could get away with cheating, and sometimes he felt as if this were all a misunderstanding. 

Come on. 

Who was he kidding?

He pushed himself back on his rolling chair and stood up. “You going to lunch already, Cas?” Gabriel’s eyes followed him, “Want me to go with you?

Cas forced a smile, pretending as if the injuries inside weren’t burning at him, “That’s alright. I won’t take long.” That was a promise. He needed to clear things up and determine if he wanted to continue what he had with Dean or not. 

He walked to the break room, every feeling in his body poking him with the sharp end of the stick of betrayal. Castiel had the option to turn away and sit back down, pulling the card of slowly distancing himself from the problem so that he wouldn’t make it worse. If he didn’t confront Dean, who knew how many other Omegas he’d lure into his trap. 

Castiel slowly turned the handle of the small door when he reached it, and pushed it open. The first sight was of Dean leaned against the wall, tapping into his phone. He wondered if he was texting Bela that he’d meet her soon. What an asshole. 

“Hey.” The omega started quietly. 

Dean’s head shot up, and when his eyes caught Castiel’s, a wide grin grew on his face, “Hey, baby.” He took steps towards him, snaking his hand around Cas’ waist when he was close enough and trying to kiss him, but Castiel moved away. 

“Everything alright?” Dean was concerned. 

What could he possibly be worried about?

“It’s been a long day, that’s all.” His wolf smacked him. _Stupid_! It demanded that he told the alpha what was really happening. 

“Tell me about it.” Dean chuckled, “What was it that you needed to talk about?” He reached for Castiel’s face and caressed his cheek softly. It made the omega sick. How could Dean touch him so lovingly and then go home to Bela? Did he look in the same way as he did to Castiel? Did he love her? 

“Someone was looking for you today?” And here it went…

“Oh? Who was it? Was Lisa out that she couldn’t take the message herself?”

“She was out for lunch.” Cas clarified. 

“Still, they could’ve just waited for her to comeback. Did they give you their info? Were they important?”

Castiel reached into his pocket and he shakenly handed the paper to the Alpha. He wrote her name, but not her association with him. It was painful to even think about it. 

His blue orbs burned holes into Dean’s head as he undid the smashed ball of paper. It took Dean a second to read it through, and when the words stuck to him, he closed his eyes, and whispered, “Cas—”

 _Wham_! Castiel’s fist flew at Dean’s face and hit his cheek. The Alpha barely moved but the impact was evident, his lip was bloody. “You lied to me.”

Dean cleaned the blood with the back of his hand, “Let me explain.”

“Explain what? That she doesn’t mean anything to you? That you actually care about me? If you did, you would’ve left me alone. I was better off without you.” He spat at Dean, “Why would you do this to me? To her?”

“It’s different with you.”

“You’re getting married!” He almost yelled. Castiel was beginning to breathe quickly again, his chest wanting to explode. 

“It’s not like that.”

He scoffed, “It’s not?”

Dean wanted to touch him, but when he came close, Castiel pushed him away. “Listen to me, please, Cas. I had never wanted anyone as much as you. Not even her. I didn’t mean to hurt her or you, but I got carried away the moment you kissed me—”

Castiel hit Dean again, this time striking his jaw, “You could’ve told me, I would have understood. I am not a five-year-old, Dean, I know better and so do you, so why would you continue to lie to me? Was this your plan all along? Did you just one day decide that you were going to take advantage of me?”

“No, Cas, you’re different.”

“Is Bela that girl you supposedly left behind?”

“No! That girl was a fragment of my past. Bela…she’s something else, okay? I do care about you a lot, you mean so much to me in ways that never happened with her. It’s almost as if you and I are meant to be mate—”

He raised his hand to stop him from proceeding, Dean closed his mouth, “Don’t you fucking say it.” Cas hissed. “I thought you would be different, that you would be the good in my life I was in desperate need of.”

“Cas—”

“Let me finish. Those days I spent with you, the nights we slept together, made me feel as if I would never have to repeat the mistakes that Michael and Gadreel were. You weren’t as bad as Michael, but you are no better than Gadreel. You’re a liar and like every other godforsaken Alpha, you just wanted a hole to shove your knot into.” Cas realized, midway through his speech, that his tears were flowing and they were nowhere near done. “I wanted you to be the one. I really did, Dean, but what you did…it makes me feel so dirty as we speak.”

Dean reached for Castiel’s face, and that time the Omega didn’t move away. He let him. “I got carried away, and I’m sorry. I should’ve stopped myself, I know, but everything about you drove me crazy. You caused feelings I never felt with anyone before.”

“Are you mated with her? Have you knotted her?”

The Alpha shook his head, “No, you’re the only one I’ve done that with.”

“I don’t know if I should believe you.” He whimpered. Castiel knew this type of weakness. Michael exploited it every day they were together. His barriers were always down, that when he left, he rebuilt them stronger so that no one would be able to mistreat him again. Something about Dean weakened him and destroyed those thick and tall walls he always kept up, and pushed his vulnerable self out. “After this, I never want to see you again.”

“Please, Cas.” Dean’s lip quivered, his eyes resisting the temptation to cry at the sight of the hurt Omega.

“If you really care for me as you say…” Cas gulped and took a step back, his azure eyes full of hurt locking with Dean’s. “I want you to stay away from me. Be happy with your fiancé instead. She seems like a great girl, and she doesn’t deserve any of this. Lie to her like you did to me, and pretend as if you and I never happened, just as you pretended to be different for me.” His heart was beating loudly inside his chest, it wanted to pop out and show Dean the damage he caused. A heartbreak like his could not go unnoticed. “I don’t want you to approach me, to look at me, or to even think about me if it’s not work-related. I ran from the problems, unaware that I would be falling into a worse one, so do me a favor and stay away.” 

“I couldn’t, Cas.” 

Castiel cleaned his tears from his eyes. “You will have to learn, then. Stop hurting me. Let me go and be with her.” He spun around, taking in a few breaths to calm himself before deciding to step out of breakroom. It would be obvious that he had been crying, but hopefully not too much to attract unwanted attention. 

He slowly went back to his desk, putting on a face that said ‘Everything’s fine!’ even though he was dying inside. Cas was lucky that Gabriel was too busy typing away on his computer to look up when he sat down. 

The sound of the breakroom’s door closing was distant, but he turned around, and saw Dean walking out, the sadness clear in his eyes and it felt like a punch to the stomach. It wasn’t his fault that the Alpha was that way, he had it coming for being a filthy lying cheater, but his wolf was whimpering for him. It wanted to fix things with Dean, to make itself believe that Bela did not exist in their world and they could be happy.

Unfortunately, things were never easy, and things happened for a reason. What if Dean chose him and they started a relationship? How long before the Alpha took advantage of another Omega? Once a cheater, always a cheater…

God, how could he have been so foolishly naïve? This was a mistake a teenager would make! Not an Omega in his late twenties! 

Could it be that he was used to being stepped all over that he barely noticed the defects on the one person who didn’t? No, because he should’ve been a little suspicious when the handsome Alpha showed interest. Men with those types of looks only meant trouble. 

For the remainder of the day, Castiel couldn’t focus on anything that wasn’t Dean. All he wanted was to be home and cry out what was left of his feelings. Dean hurt him, took advantage of him once he was close enough, and blinded him so that Cas would never know his true intentions. 

He hated himself for being so stupid over the Alpha. How could someone like Dean actually like him, tainted and stubborn? Castiel was a broken figure that was constantly being put back together, only to be shattered again. There was nothing special about him. He was just dirty. 

An Omega without a mate and with so many bite scars on their body, had no place in a world that depended on the idea of purity. They were thrown away to the sides so that they could degrade themselves and live under the impression that this would be the rest of their life. 

There was a moment, where Cas saw himself differently under a dissimilar light. It was the night Dean knotted him, when he fell asleep against his chest. 

Hearing his heartbeat boom, filled him with joy because he was the cause of it. Not even Gadreel’s heart had been that clear and loud, and the Alpha claimed to love him. Dean was supposed to be the different his life craved for to do some good. 

He was another disappointment. 

When he got home and sat on his couch, he broke down again, this time not holding back, and sobbing into his hands. The last time he cried like that was when Michael first forced himself on him. 

Cas was a broken Omega. Nobody would want him like that, and the haunting reminder of it brought him back to those dark areas of his mind that he kept locked up. 

Would the world be better off without him? Would he be missed? Would Dean regret it, or move on? Castiel wanted the pain to go away, but didn’t have the strength to do anything about it. His motivations were weak. 

The only thing he could do then, was continue to cry out and listen to his phone vibrate as the first of many calls from Dean Winchester started to come in. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please tell me what you think!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: mentions of rape

**Chapter 10**

“ _Cas, please answer me, I want to talk to you_.”

“ _Cas, c’mon_.”

“ _At least let me know you’re okay. I’ve kept my word and stayed away like you wanted me to, but give me some hints, man. I want to know if you’re well. The tension’s killing m_ e.”

“ _Castiel, please baby, answer my calls. I’m a piece of shit, but I care about you and I want to be with you, okay? I really, really do want to be with you and if you asked me to, I’d break it off with Bela. Right. Now_.”

During this message, Dean was drunk. “ _Cas…I know…I know I did you wrong. I know I…lied to you…But I want to see you…You told me to stay away from you, yes, but…’s not really easy, y’know? You’re the perfect image of an angel and I can’t get enough of you_.” Castiel turned towards his phone, wiping the drying tears from his face, “ _Do you have any idea how many drinks I have in my system as we speak? Like…_ ” There was a brief pause, “ _Like nine…of expensive vodka. Let me see you one more time and I swear to God, I will never bother you again. Just lemme know you’re alright, even though you’re not, because I’m a big fucking idiot that thinks with the wrong head—_ ”

Cas pressed on his phone to end the message. It wasn’t long before the screen brightened with Dean’s name and his ringtone went off again. After a minute of the piano theme playing, and a moment of silence, the playback of a recording started, “ _I don’t know what it is about you, Cas Novak, but it drives me crazy. Is it your blue eyes? Your smooth skin? The way you smile, which is incredibly rare, could drive two peaceful men into a bloodthirsty war for your love? What is it? I can’t get you out of my head. It’s like every fiber of you tattooed itself into my mind because it’s the only thing I can think of. Everything changed the moment I saw you. It was so easy to like you so much, something I honestly didn’t expect, because I suddenly wanted to give you the world. Losing you might be the end of me, because I think…I love you…_ ”

The Omega raised his head and reached for his phone. Had Dean really said that? Did he mean it? His fingers were working their way into tapping on the callback button, but he was heavily trembling to properly concentrate on what he wanted. Before he could press on Dean’s number, and go over with himself about what he was about to do, he received a call from his brother Inias.

He cleared his throat and answered, “Hello?”

“ _Cas_!”

“W-what’s up?”

“ _You busy Saturday_?”

“No, why?”

“ _Because it’s Anna’s birthday and we want to throw her a surprise dinner at this fancy ass restaurant. Bart already made the reservations in a Seattle eatery, and don’t worry, our parents won’t be there, just us_.” Inias explained, “ _Although, with Bart there, it kind of does feel like our parents are there, but I promise you that if he gets out of hand, I’ll fuck him up for ya. Does that sound like a deal_?”

Cas thought about it, “I don’t know, Inias…”

“ _Well, even if you didn’t want to go, I told Anna that you’d be there, so she’s expecting to see your face. She hasn’t seen you since… **him**_.” He knew his brother was aware of how much the mention of Michael emotionally hurt him, so he tried to keep it subtle. “ _I don’t want to force you, because I know that we haven’t exactly been the perfect family, but I truly do want to see you there, and so do the rest of our siblings. Especially Anna and Rachel. They have no clue as to where you left, so it’d be nice if you kept them updated for Anna’s birthday_.”

The Omega closed his eyes at the mention of his ex-partner and the hesitation that pulled at him, “Yeah, I guess I’ll make an appearance then.”

“ _You better. This restaurant charges you per seat for a reservation. Dress nicely. By nice I don’t mean your nicest superhero themed T-shirt, no, I want to see you in a button-up, a belt, and a tie. You could also bring that ugly trench coat of yours if you’d like_.”

Cas took offense to his brother’s statement, “It’s not ugly.”

“ _It’s very ugly_.”

It felt weird at first, but Cas managed to smile, “Only because you don’t like it, but it’s very comfortable.”

“ _You only keep it because Tyson Brady gave it to you_.”

The lightness his heart felt immediately faded at the mention of another unspeakable name. This one was different, however, because it wasn’t about what Tyson Brady did to him, but of what Castiel did that fatally hurt the Alpha. 

“ _Is that name still a red light between us_?”

“No.”

“ _Doesn’t sound like it. Sorry I brought him up. It wasn’t my intention to remind you of him. It’s been so long since the incident that I kind of forgot_.”

“It wasn’t just an incident, Inias. Brady died because of me.” He choked out the name. It hurt to think about the damage he caused to an Alpha that didn’t deserve it. One of the different few. “I’ll meet you there, okay? I promise I’ll show up.”

“ _Thank you. Take care of yourself until then, will ya, Cas_?”

“I will.”

“ _I’ll see you Saturday_.” 

When the call ended, Cas placed his phone on top of his coffee table again, and waited until Dean’s next phone call came in. He planned on talking him to ask him if he meant it when he said he loved him. Those words were a delicate territory for him. The last person who used them on him were Gadreel and before that, Tyson Brady.

He didn’t blame his brother Inias for forgetting the situation, Cas did so too. It happened when he was twenty-three, five years ago, and the whole mess had been a blur. The only thing he remembered was two other Omegas helping him get out of Michael’s house when he heard the gunshot and a body drop. Brady died to ensure a future for him. Although he was never good at showing it, he always wanted a happy life for Castiel. 

Till this day, Cas regretted not loving him in the ways the Alpha loved him.

He shook his head. No, he couldn’t think about that or him now. Not when he already had so many weights on his shoulders dragging him down. 

**-.-.-.-.-.-**

Castiel didn’t know how he managed to sit on his bathtub and not drown himself. He couldn’t do that to his sister on her special day. The last thing he wanted was for Anna to receive a phone call to tell her that her Omega brother decided to kill himself while taking a bath. 

Perhaps another day. 

His bathtub was used to wash all of his penances away, hoping that it’d be sufficient to keep a smile on his face long enough to make Anna happy. His sister’s happiness for that day was the only thing that mattered for him. For the day, he was going to pretend as if he wasn’t burning up inside because another Alpha used him. 

Cas dressed in his nicest dark pants and a brand new button-up shirt with a blue tie that he bought for the occasion and his nicest black shoes. In the mirror, he looked like the sleep deprived and pale Omega he was, but he needed to fix that for Anna. Castiel didn’t want to leave her with a bad aftertaste or the worry of what his life had become after Michael. 

He had to make the impression like he was doing good when he really wasn’t. 

Before Cas could start fixing his clothes to make them look presentable, his phone’s ringtone went off and he sighed. Dean had taken too long before he started calling again. He grabbed his phone and pressed on the recording of the voicemail. 

“ _Hey, Cas, it’s me again_.” Dean’s voice was low, “ _I, uh, was just calling again to ask if you’re doing okay. I know I don’t deserve a call, but I’ve seen you around work, completely breaking the boundary you set out for me, and I wanted to ask how you are. You don’t have to call me back, I don’t expect you to, but give me some sort of sign, like a text of an emoji, or some bullshit work document. Just let me know you’re alright. I won’t call again. It’s been days, but I’ve finally decided on that because I’m an asshole and calling you just proves it. Goodbye, Cas_.”

The Omega hated to admit how strongly he still felt towards Dean. For every phone call and voicemail, there was some doubt pushing him to forgive him for everything he caused. He was willing to sink himself so low for Dean if the Alpha asked him, but his strong will kept his chin up and made him stubborn. 

It didn’t matter how many times Dean begged for his forgiveness, he wasn’t some toy he could play with while Bela was away. He also didn’t run away from Michael’s abuse and Gadreel’s neglect only to end up in the arms of a cheater. 

Dean fucked up, and his mistakes came with consequences for Castiel, he refused to degrade himself further so that the Alpha could get his way and walk unharmed. Cas took the punches and he was barely recovering from the impact. 

He thought the best way to punish Dean would be to keep him guessing about his wellbeing. Later on, he could probably come up with better things. Like fucking other Alphas. Who was to stop him from enjoying himself? Certainly not a very engaged Dean Winchester. 

It shouldn’t be too hard for him to find someone who’d want to mess around with him for a while. Cas knew how desirable he was. The Novak’s were granted with incomparable looks and Cas had an outrageous sex drive, so any Alpha would be insane to reject him.

Sure, he wasn’t the type to sleep around for the hell of it, but whenever he was desperate and/or upset, his Omega wolf drove him to do stupid things just to get it out of his system. It happened with Dean. Sleeping with someone as a stress relief wouldn’t hurt anyone, at least he hoped so. 

Cas sighed, letting out his nervousness through a huffed breath. It’d be so long since he saw his siblings. All thanks to Michael, who forbid him from having family visits since Cas refused to willingly have sex with him. 

He wondered what they might look like now. Anna and Rachel were probably still beautiful and Bartholomew most likely still had that huge stick up his ass. The only reason he and Inias maintained a close relationship was because his brother gave him his scent blockers and suppressants. If it weren’t for that, he probably would’ve been as distant as the rest of his siblings were. 

Cas finished dressing up, adjusted his tie, and double knotted his shoelaces. The suit he had was comfortable and a little too hot for his taste, but he hoped that wearing it would only be temporary. He really didn’t want to have to carry the jacket around all afternoon.

The Omega decided it was best if he didn’t take his scent blocker for the night. If he was lucky, he’d attract a good enough Alpha to make him forget about Dean and all of his lies. It sounded ridiculous in his head when he ran it by, but desperate times called for desperate measures, and Cas was drenched in anxiety. 

He grabbed his trench coat, which he bothered to clean because he didn’t want to hear Inias bitching about its condition, keys, cell phone, and walked out of his apartment. 

Luckily for him, the elevator was fixed so he didn’t have to sweat up his new suit by running down the stairs, but he was hoping that it’d still be broken if it meant passing by his hot neighbor. Castiel seriously needed to learn the guy’s name. 

The drive from Bellevue to Seattle had been the longest hour of Castiel’s life thanks to traffic. He forgot how busy the streets got Saturday nights and the little patience the Omega had with his car’s GPS. He would’ve never known that he drove past the restaurant twice, had his brother not texted him the name of it. 

In comparison to the cars that surrounded him, his 2006 Toyota was garbage, and the clothes that other clients wore made his two-hundred-dollar suit feel like a ten dollar rent. 

He started towards the entrance, sticking behind an Alpha woman wearing a fancy red gown, and a short man, he guessed her Omega, holding her hand. 

The hostess looked at him like he didn’t belong. Cas couldn’t blame her. “Do you have a reservation?” She asked politely, trying not to seem disgusted by the appearance of his trench coat. Even with the two washes he gave it, it still seemed as if he picked it from the trash. 

“Yes, actually, with Bartholomew Novak.”

“Oh!” She reached for a menu on the side of her stand, “Of course, follow me.” The hostess, an Omega, guided him inside the restaurant, passing by a large aquarium and another set of doors. “You’re a lucky one if you’re dining here.” She smiled at Cas and he understood why. If he thought that the other area was fancy, this was ten times superior. There were crystal chandeliers, live music, golden, silk tablecloths that shined underneath the lighting of the place, and exotic decorations set on the middle of each table. 

“Bartholomew Novak’s table.” The Omega woman pulled out a chair for Cas and set a menu in front of him. Before he could sit though, a pair of thin but still muscular arms wrapped around him and his vision blurred by an incoming rouge. 

“Castiel! Oh, big brother I’ve missed you so much.”

Anna smelled of strawberries and kiwi, it made him smile because God knew how long it’d been since he saw his Alpha sister, “It’s nice to see you too, Anna, and happy birthday.” He wasn’t very good with showing affection, so the best he could do was pat her back. 

“What’s the matter with you? You look so tired, is everything alright? Did you come alone? Or is someone with you?” She scanned his body length, searching for something else to ask him about. 

“Okay, give me some time to sit down first and greet the rest of the family, and then I can answer your questions.” He looked over the table, leaning over to talk to the rest of his grinning siblings. 

He was right about Rachel, she was still beautiful, her blond hair glowing over her shoulders while wearing a long emerald dress, her Beta elegance was so strong, Castiel could feel it through their hug. Bartholomew was looking like he didn’t want to be there, but Cas managed to catch a glimmer in his eyes when they shook hands. Inias was dressed better than he was used to seeing him in, he wore a suit with a gray tie, and his typically messy hair was combed back. They greeted each other with a nod. 

“It’s so nice to see you, Cas.” Rachel said.

“Thank you.”

Bart intervened, “You’re a bit pale. Don’t go out much?” Man, that didn’t take long. “I was expecting you to livelier.”

Cas chuckled, “Work has been a load on me.”

“Was is it that you do again?”

He took his seat, and gave the assigned waitress that approached them his drink order, “I work in an office. For Cain & Abel Corp.”

“How’d you manage to get a job there?” There was a certain venomous tone in Bart’s voice that annoyed Castiel to a point that probably reflected off his face.

“Lots of hard work.” Seriously lots of hard work. Cain Marks was a person who didn’t let just anyone into his company. He needed to trust them, so in order to do that, Cas had to build up a breathtaking resume and a life story that said enough about him to keep his boss and coworkers wondering. 

“I bet.”

“Bart.” Rachel scolded, “That’s enough.” She turned to Castiel, “I’m happy you landed a job there. Not many have that capability and I’m sure he company has earned themselves a capable worker.”

“Thank you.”

“No problem, honey.” She assured him before she turned to Anna, “So, Ann, you’re finally twenty-five. How does it feel?”

“Well, I’m halfway through fifty.” The red-headed Alpha joked, “No, but it feels great. I’m in one of the best places of my life right now. I have a great, supportive boyfriend. His name is Balthazar by the way, and he’s a Beta, an amazing job, and a somewhat still stable family. It couldn’t get better than this. I’m glad you’re all here to celebrate with me.”

Inias spoke up, “Why didn’t you bring your boyfriend?”

“I wanted this to be all about us. Besides, he already celebrated me yesterday.” She winked at her siblings and Inias responded with a disgusted groan. 

As soon as the waitress brought in Castiel’s drink and took their orders, a vodka soda, Cas downed the first half of it. So far, his siblings all had really good lives. Cas had an okay job and had the terrible experience with Alphas who only used him to get their way. If he mentioned any of it, Bartholomew would make it center topic for the rest of their evening. 

Eventually it would come up. His brothers and sisters were big on comparing life stories, and it was only a matter of time before it was Cas’ turn. 

Rachel had just been engaged to a wealthy Alpha and landed a job as a doctor in a Montana hospital. She was beaming every time she spoke of her Alpha, a man named Raphael, and was hoping for pups soon. 

Inias had just opened his own pharmacy in Seattle and was courting an Omega that started working for him. He didn’t have to be explicit about what he was doing to the man, but there were enough implications to make his family uncomfortable.

Bart had the best life in the group, as expected. He was married to a beautiful Beta named Hester and had three gorgeous kids with her. They owned a large home in California and were building a summer home in Texas. As an always winning lawyer, Bart made a ridiculous amount of money a year.

“So, Cas, how has your life been?” Bart objectionably asked and Inias was glaring his way, because of the four siblings waiting for Cas to share his life story, he was the one who knew the most of it. 

“I guess it’s been good.”

Anna raised an eyebrow, “Is that it? No mate in your life?”

Rachel interfered, “Aren’t you dating a self-defense teacher?”

How could he explain to them that Gadreel dumped him because he was disgusted by the mating marks that Michael scarred him with, something he had no control over? Castiel cleared his throat, “He and I…we ended our relationship a few months ago. We weren’t meant to be.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Rachel comforted him. 

“Why date around when you could’ve settled for Michael?” Bart took a sip from his wine glass. 

Inias coughed when he saw his Omega brother tense, “I don’t think you should say that. You didn’t know him as well as we did.”

“I went to high school with him. I knew him pretty well. He always had feelings for Castiel, and when they mated, Cas was fine.”

“Bart, I think that’s enough. It’s not appropriate to talk about him here.” Anna whispered.

Cas never thought of his brother as insensitive, but he was. He was cold hearted, didn’t think of the consequences of his actions unless they affected him in any way, and even when they did, he always found the easy route out. 

He was the one that encouraged his parents to marry him off to Michael, unaware of what would come for the only Novak Omega. “Do you have any idea of what he did to me?” Castiel spat.

“He comes from a family of money; I think you should’ve put out longer for the sake of our family. Do you really believe that your math degree was going to be enough to keep the family name where it is now?”

Castiel’s head was replaying every scream he let out when he pleaded Michael to stop, to let him go, in the hopes that maybe the Alpha would listen to him at least once. “He _raped_ me.” The Omega whimpered, his eyes burning with tears. He caught people glaring his way at the mention of his words. “It wasn’t a one-time thing. He did it several times. Because of him and the many marks he left on me as a reminder, my ex-boyfriend left me.”

Bartholomew’s smug façade was replaced by shock, like he was debating in his head on whether to believe Castiel or not, “You’re exaggerating.”

“Yeah?” Cas stood up. He undid his tie and unbuttoned the first two buttons of his shirt, so that he’d be able to show his brother the bite scars on his neck and shoulders. “These belong to him. I have eleven more if you need further proof.”

“Cas…”

Cas’ blue eyes met Anna’s watery ones. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring this up here.” He apologized while clumsily grabbing his jacket and coat with shaking hands. “I think it’s best if I go. You guys enjoy yourselves.”

She grabbed his arm, “Please, stay.”

“I can’t.” Castiel refused to look her directly. He couldn’t have her see how weak he actually was. “I’ll organize something for us to meet later. It’s been a lovely afternoon, and I’ll send your gift with Inias once I get it. Take care.” He kissed her forehead then glanced over to his siblings, who all shared pained expressions but waved their goodbyes. 

Castiel wished he could stay, but being in the same table as a brother who doubted him, hurt him. How could he believe an abuser’s words over his? Was he that low that Cas’ claims of rape had no meaning to him?

Walking away made his heart ache, but it was too late to turn back. Doing so would give Bart power to step all over him, and he didn’t overcome himself only to fall into the abyss again. He outgrew his old self to know that he was beyond that.

Outside, the rain started pouring, and Castiel damned the sky under his breath because this happened just as he thought his day couldn’t get worse. His car was too far away to guarantee a safe and dry arrival, but he continued his way into the rain anyway.

He was close to his car when he heard a voice calling for him in the distance. “Castiel?”

Cas turned, expecting one of his siblings to follow him, but the person approaching him was worse. “Bela?”

She was dressed in a casual black dress with a red coat over it, and carried a transparent umbrella. Her smile became more beautiful the closer she got, “What are you doing here, sweetheart?” The Beta moved her umbrella so that it covered both of them. 

“Um, I just got out of a family dinner.”

“Is that so?”

“Yeah.”

Bela eyed his exposed neck, but didn’t mention the obvious marks engraved into his flesh, instead, “If you’re not busy, would you mind accompanying me for a cup of coffee?”

His head screamed at him to say no. She was the fiancée of the Alpha he slept with twice, having coffee with her would make Castiel as inconsiderate as his brother. Her smile was so friendly, and her intentions seemed pure; it was difficult to follow his mind’s demands. “Right now?”

“I know this great place; you’ll love their pumpkin spice lattes.”

Cas nodded, “Okay.” 

When Castiel told himself that he was willing to do something stupid to get Dean out of his thoughts and heart, he never intended to fulfill that by becoming friends with his girlfriend. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHOAH LONG CHAPTER. I hope you guys enjoyed it and please tell me what you think!


	11. Chapter 11

  **Chapter 11**

It was hard to look or talk to Bela, without the words ‘ _You slept with her fiancé_ ’ repeating in Castiel’s head. He was paranoid that at any moment, he’d reveal his secret to her. 

“What’s the matter, sweetheart, you’re looking a little pale.” Her cat-like eyes ate him up, taking in and studying each of his movements like the good lawyer she was. “I hope it wasn’t from the rain, I’d hate to see you get sick.”

Castiel refused to take his eyes off his coffee cup, afraid that if he did, he’d yell out sleeping with Dean, “Everything’s okay, thank you.”

“You’re talking to a human lying detector. I’m supposed to know when someone is lying to me, it’s part of my job, and you are doing it right now. You can trust me, I don’t bite, if that’s what you’re worried about.” Her smile was kind, but Cas spotted the small deviousness to it. 

“I can guarantee everything’s alright.” He smiled lightly, trying not to eat himself up from his lie. Goddamn it.

“Okay, I’ll take your word for that, but just know that you can talk to me. I don’t know why but you intrigue me, you’re very interesting, and I’ve had my fair share of interesting people.” She sipped at her cup, “Are you enjoying your latte?”

Cas forgot about it, “Yeah, it’s delicious. Thank you for paying for it.”

Bela squinted, “Hmmm,” she started thoughtfully, “I’m assuming that family dinner of yours didn’t go as planned, huh?”

Uh…he could roll with that… “That obvious?”

“I’ve had a few of those, actually.” It was hard to imagine since everything about Bela seemed perfect. “Family gatherings at the Talbot house tend to be a mess.”

“How come?”

“My parents don’t like my fiancé."

The Omega gulped, “Is t-that so?” What a great way to pretend if he hadn’t begged like a whore to her fiancé to knot him a few nights ago. 

“Yes, they think Dean is…untrustworthy. I can guarantee you he is not. For an Alpha, he’s quite different. He’s sweet.” Sensitive. “Caring.” Loving. “Amazing in bed.” Holy fuck, yes! 

Wait.

No!

What the hell? How dare he think about Dean in that manner when his girlfriend was right in front of him? Cas felt sick at himself for being so inconsiderate of her. He sighed, “I can only imagine.” He nervously laughed, trying to get the thoughts of the green eyed Alpha out of his head. 

“They have no idea how good he is to me.” And she had no idea how easily it was to make him chase after another. This time, he thought about the voicemail Dean sent about wanting to leave Bela for Cas. 

“I just know him as my boss.”

“You don’t have a mate?” She asked. 

“Um, no.” And didn’t want one for now. Every time he searched for the perfect candidate, they only disappointed him more than the last. 

Bela’s eyes were on his exposed neck again, examining the scars engraved on his creamy skin. Cas covered himself when she leaned in to whisper, “Were those done to you against your will?” She reached for his hand, “You know you can tell me, right? I’m a lawyer that deals with this constantly.”

Castiel shook his head immediately, “I prefer not to, but thanks for your offer.”

“If you’re afraid to say something—”

“It’s not that.” He interrupted, “It’s just difficult to talk about. I hope you can understand. I would like to tell you, but…”

“Say no more, only speak whenever you’re ready. Don’t force yourself.” She assured him, her confidence and lightness in tone, creating a smile in Castiel’s face, which surprised her, “Oh, you have such a cute smile! You should do it more often, it suits you.”

Cas reddened, “T-thank you.” He wasn’t sure how many time he had thanked her that evening, but every time he repeated himself, he felt guiltier of what he had done. 

“You’re welcome, sugar.” She paused briefly, “I’ve been meaning to ask, but would be interested in going on a blind date?”

The Omega blinked, a little shocked at how quickly the conversations had turned a different way, “With one of your friends?”

“More like my step brother, he’s an Alpha detective. He’s thirty-one and he’s been looking for a companion since an unfortunate event in a previous job where he lost the person he thought was the One. He’s not picky, if you’re worried about that, but I’m certain he’ll love you. You’re totally his type.”

Cas hesitated, “And what is his type, exactly?”

“Dark haired, colored eyed Omegas like you,” Cas sighed because he forgot he didn’t take his scent blockers, “Tall, with the athletic build. An Omega of your caliber is hard to find in this society.”

Castiel didn’t know how to tell her that he wasn’t interested, not after her fiancé broke his heart. He couldn’t find the timing or words to do so.

“You don’t have to say yes. It’s all up to you, you know? It was a silly suggestion of me, but I thought I could give it a shot.”

It was too soon to even consider dating again due to his trust issues. Cas didn’t care about finding someone now, what if they turned out to be worse than any of his exes? “I don’t know…” He responded. 

“Like I said, it’s up to you. I don’t know how tough you’ve had it, but if that’s what’s preventing you from accepting, then I get it.” Bela smiled at him again, sending reassuring vibes to him to make him feel more comfortable. 

He knew that he had the choice, Bela made it clear, but from the little he knew her, he was somewhat sure that the guy she was trying to set him up with might actually be good? “I could maybe give it a shot…” As soon as he said it, Cas regretted it. “Your step brother and I could hang out as friends and I’ll determine if I want to see him after that…”

“Are you sure?”

Cas nodded, “Yes.”

“I was thinking, that since there’s an upcoming gala organized by Crowley St. Cloud.,” A very powerful Alpha that was in charge of a lot of important events in Washington, “I could set you up for the guest list. I’ll be taking Dean, and you could go with my step brother.”

Now, things changed. His mind low-key wanted him to show up that night with a new Alpha by his side while Dean was with Bela. He could give him a taste of his own medicine by showing him how easily Cas could forget about what they had.

“I’ll do it, I’ll go.”

“Great!” The Beta woman beamed.

Cas hated holding on to grudges, but he refused to let himself be the example of a cheating Alpha. He wasn’t gonna run away from his problems this time, he made so much progress with his self-worth to do that. Dean played him to get his way, now it was Castiel’s turn to make his move and if Bela’s brother was the answer, then he was going to take it. 

It was a dick move though, he knew that, to use an innocent man to get back at another. It wouldn’t be his first time. He did that to Dean when he used him for a quick fuck in order to forget that his ex-boyfriend called to tell Cas he still loved him. 

“When is it?” Castiel asked Bela, determined to go forward with his plan.

“It’s in two weeks. I need to call to set up an invitation for you. You should get it in a few days.” The Beta looked down to her phone when it vibrated, “Well, I should get going. We should hang out some time, maybe I could put out a good word for you to Dean.” Oh, Cas was certain Dean knew plenty about him, “If it all works out between you and my brother, perhaps we could set up a double date.” She grabbed her purse and umbrella. “It was good to see you, I really enjoyed your company. I would love us to be friends.”

He couldn’t do that to her, “Yeah.”

Bela smiled at him one more time before walking away from their small table, leaving Castiel alone with the thoughts that were just waiting for the right time to attack him. 

He didn’t ask for her brother’s name…he couldn’t believe he went for it. All for the sake of getting back at an Alpha who hurt him. It’s not like he didn’t deserve it. Dean wanted to make him suffer? Cas could play that game too and he could hit just as hard.

For a moment, he couldn’t believe he actually considered doing this to Dean, but he had it coming. Dean was a lying asshole who used him as a fuck hole, and probably would’ve continued it if Cas hadn’t found out about Bela. He was thankful about it, because he was sure that if he kept it going longer, Dean would’ve obtained the power to tell him to jump off a cliff, and the Omega would willingly do it. 

**-.-.-.-.-.-**

Even after getting home, reading a book, and taking a nap to the beat of the pouring rain, Cas couldn’t get the bad aftertaste of his dinner with his family out of his mouth. He wished circumstances had been different, and he could have exchanged information with them on a lighter note, but life was obviously not going to be that nice to him. 

He also kept thinking about the unrecognizable bond that had developed between him and Bela. How could he accept her friendship knowing how he fucked her boyfriend twice, and even asked him to knot him? Cas seriously had some nerve…

Was he that desperate for a friend that he was willing to take the kindness from a woman who didn’t deserve to be cheated on? Would he be as bad as Dean was and sleep with another woman’s Alpha just to satisfy his needs?

Cas was upset that he allowed himself to be so low to take advantage of Bela and accepted to go out with her step brother, just to get even with Dean. He hated himself. He was petty and pathetic, no better than what he shamed Dean for. 

It made him a little teary. 

How dare he get up on such a high horse? Was there a way to make it better? To make the pain fade away?

Before he could continue to scold himself, the Omega reached for his phone, tapped a few numbers into the screen, and held it up to his ear. The answer was immediate, and as soon as he heard that butter-melting voice with a light southern accent, he wanted to break down completely with remorse, “ _H-hello_?”

He closed his eyes and sighed, “I hate you.” He knew he wasn’t thinking straight, that he was letting his heart take over instead of his mind, but he had so many things to say to him, to let out so that he could breathe normally again.

Castiel heard the shuffling of bedsheets in the background, “ _Are you alright? It’s past midnight. Is everything okay?_ ” 

The Omega brought his maroon colored blanket closer around himself, “Everything’s fine…I just can’t stop thinking about what you did…or what we briefly had…”

“ _Me neither. I miss you so much. I can’t eat, I barely manage to sleep, I just want to think about you and how much you mean_ —”

“I didn’t call to hear you say what you’ve probably told Bela every morning,” Cas gulped, the air he swallowed feeling like a large rock, “I just wanted you to know that you fucked me up, Dean.”

“ _No, Cas, don’t say that to me_.”

“And what? Let you get away with it? No, Dean, you…you hurt me, and the two times we slept together, you fucking knew but didn’t stop because you thought you could pin it on me. Was it because I was an Omega? Or because I was lonely? How far did you think you’d get before I found out? Worse, before Bela found out?” Cas felt vulnerable with every word he let out. 

“ _It was never like that, okay? My intention was never to hurt you. I got carried away and I should’ve told you that I was with her the day after. I shouldn’t have allowed myself to kiss you back that night._ ”

“But you didn’t. You kept going until I begged you to knot me. Is that what you wanted?”

“ _No_!”

“Then why the fuck did it have to be me?!” His voice cracked, “Why me, out of all the other Omegas that threw their slick soaked panties at you?”

“ _Because I was an idiot. I was thinking with the wrong head. I never intended to hurt you in any way, but I let my needs come before your feelings. I understand you being angry with me, but God, don’t hate me_.”

Castiel chuckled, “Why shouldn’t I?”

“ _Believe it or not, I want to make this work. I want to make you happy, even if it takes forever, I want to keep trying. You drive me crazy in ways I had never experienced before, not even with **her**_.” Dean took in a large breath, “ _It’s silly now, I know, but I just want you to know how much I love_ —” The Alpha’s voice lowered before it stopped completely. 

“ _Dean, sweetie, who are you talking to_?” Holy shit. Bela. “I _t’s almost one in the morning…_ ”

“ _Uh, yeah, just…just give me a sec, okay_?”

“ _Come back to bed, it’s getting cold_.”

“ _Let me finish this call first_ —” Cas shakenly hung up instead. How could he have so stupid and naïve? How was he such a big idiot to call Dean when he should’ve known better. Cas thought he’d be alone, why would Dean be with Bela, right? The Alpha kept telling him he’d leave her, but he was in bed with her instead.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Calling Dean was a mistake.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please tell me what you think. I have something major planned for the rest of the story and a plost twist coming in maybe? I'm not very good at that hahah.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

Dean never meant to hurt Cas. Unfortunately, that’s how things were and now he was paying for it, and so was the Omega.

He couldn’t stop calling him, thinking about him, about his tears, his hits…everything reminded him of Castiel Novak and how much he had fucked up. 

Talking to his boss didn’t help either. Cain kept telling him how it’ll pass and Dean would eventually move on to another Omega that was just as willing to suck his dick. He didn’t understand what he and Cas shared. How could he?

“He wasn’t like that.”

“No Omega ever is, Dean.” Cain looked up from his cellphone’s screen, “Once you show them a good time, all their morals go out the window. Omegas nowadays like to play the tough nut card, but trust me, it doesn’t last long if you know how to touch them in all the right places. I’m speaking from experience.”

“You’ve cheated on Colette?”

Cain nodded and said, “It’s not like she’s the innocent one either. She’s cheated on me as well. With more Alphas than I with Omegas. Every Alpha does it once in a while. There’s too many Omegas out there in need of a good knot. Who’s to stop you from giving it to them, right?”

“I never intended to hurt him like that. It’s unlike me.”

The gray haired Alpha arched an eyebrow, “Wait, you’re more concerned over the booty call than your girlfriend?”

“I don’t know what it is about Cas, okay? And don’t call him a booty call. It wasn’t like that.”

Cain blinked, surprised, “Cas? As is Castiel Novak? The new guy?”

“Well, he isn’t that new. He’s been here like two months.”

“No way. You fucked that fine piece of ass?”

Dean was uncomfortable with the way Cain just casually threw the word fuck like it was no big deal. To the Alpha it was. “It was a heat of the moment, it was never intended to go beyond that, but I was quick to develop feelings for him. He’s a huge mystery begging to be solved.”

“I bet.” He paused, “So what about Bela? Was she also a heat of the moment that you’re done with? You’ve been with her for what? Three years?”

Dean closed his eyes and corrected Cain, “Four.”

“Four.” He repeated, “What are you gonna do about that? It’s not like you can walk into her law firm and simply say you’re over. You’re engaged. It’s going to take a fuck ton more than that to end it. That’s if you want to remain friends.”

“I know, I know.” The green eyed Alpha ran his hand through his hair, “I do care about Bela, but the time I was with Cas, made my feelings towards her change. It’s difficult to explain. What I feel for Castiel now, comes nowhere near what I feel for Bela. It is beyond that, even from when we started dating.”

“How did he manage to do that after one fuck?”

There it was again, “It was twice.”

“So that wasn’t really a heat of the moment then, that was an affair.” Cain said matter-of-factly. “You had an affair with an Omega, and developed feelings.”

He hadn’t looked at it that way, but Cain was right. He and Cas were an affair. The type he saw in movies, except Cas wasn’t evil or obsessed with him, he was hurt and wanted Dean to see what he did. They were both equally bad.  

“What do you want?”

“I want Cas to forgive me. I know I don’t deserve to be with him, he didn’t know better, but shit, I also really want to be with him.” He was frustrated and couldn’t decipher if it was himself or how things were playing out. 

“Dump Bela, then.”

“It’s easier to say than do.” Dean started, “Bela has helped me out a lot. She was there when my family had monetary problems and I couldn’t fully support them. I can’t just leave her like that. It’d destroy her. She loves me.”

“And you love Castiel.”

“No…well, yes. I do love him. It’s complex.” How else could he describe it? Was there any other way that his mind couldn’t piece together at that moment? “What Cas and I had was…special. It felt beyond just love. Like we were meant to be—”

Cain raised his hand and stopped him, “Dean, just because one good piece of tail gave you a great time, doesn’t mean you’re mates. I’m more than sure that there’s other Omegas out there that could give you what he did. Just because you shared a bed, doesn’t give you a connection to the soul. You want to know how many times I’ve spent the night at another Omega’s apartment? Plenty enough to know that none of them were special, like you’re describing Castiel here.” He stopped, “You’re infatuated, you’re not in love.”

Dean shook his head, “That’s not true.”

“No?” The other Alpha questioned, “Do you know anything about him? Anything that’s not how good he is at sex? Has he told you something about his past that he would never tell anyone else?”

He remained quiet. Yes. Cas’ exes. The one that broke him beyond repair and the one that built him up, only to tear him down. One had done more damage than the other, but the second was blinded by his own pride to see the treasure in front of him. 

“From your expression, I’m guessing he did.”

“You’d be right.”

“Okay, then did you take into consideration his trust when you were using him while Bela had her back turned? If he’s hurt now, then you didn’t. You only thought about what you wanted and about what could happen to you, not what would come to him once it all revealed itself. Tell me, when you avoided Bela’s calls to be with Castiel, did you think about the trust he had in you? Or just about your own fears of your little fantasy tumbling down?”

Dean gulped and answered, “I didn’t think about him.”

“Because why would you? You only realized how good you had it and how bad it was until he got hurt. Had he never found about your engagement, how long would you have kept the lie going? Would you have felt as bad as you do now?”

Shit.

How come his adulterer of a mentor/boss was right? He used Omegas all the time, what did he know? Apparently a lot; and his words hit him hard. Dean felt the pain swirling in his stomach as he remembered Cas’ face of disappointed the day he confronted him about Bela. He thought he could fix it with an explanation, but what he did was deeper than that. Dean should’ve thought about what Cas went through with previous Alphas, he should have put his needs aside to avoid hurting the Omega who only spent their time in pain.  

He also didn’t think about Bela. At least not in the ways he was supposed to the first time he kissed Castiel. Dean had been engaged to her for a few months, and he was doing this, messing with an Omega that was better off without him. 

His trail of thought was interrupted by his phone’s ringtone. He checked the screen, hoping that it would be his brother and spill all the beans to him in the hope that he could give him some pity advice. It was Bela. 

For a moment, he forgot he had to meet her at his apartment that afternoon. Maybe he could tell her then what he did and come clean. Not that it could make him feel better about himself, but it was a needed improvement, or at least a step forward with redeeming himself and accepting the consequences. 

“I gotta go, Cain.”

Cain smirked, “Bela or Cas?”

With a sigh, Dean replied, “Bela.”

**-.-.-.-.-.-**

Dean could hear faint music coming from the other side of the door. As he opened the door, the hint of garlic hit his nose. The Beta has ordered Italian for them, but what is bad that it reminded him of Castiel, about the second time they slept together?

The Alpha pushed the door open, slowly, dropping his keys into a bowl next to the door and placing his coat on the hanger. As he walked to his spacious living room, he spotted his girlfriend reading a magazine on his couch, wearing short shorts and one of his band shirts. 

“Hey.” He said as he undid his tie. 

Her face lit up with a joy that ate at Dean’s insides, “Oh hey, sweetheart! How was your day?”

“Tiring.”

“Mm.” She tiptoed to kiss his lips lightly and Dean tensed. Hopefully she didn’t notice. “I ordered us some pizza, wings, and breadsticks. I know how much you like to pig out on that stuff. Perhaps if you ate some, you’ll feel better after.”

“Thank you.” Dean sat on his couch and reached for the plastic bowl full of barbeque flavored wings and immediately dug into the first few his fingers made contact with. The city might’ve changed him in several ways, but he still kept his father’s appetite and ways of eating. 

Bela sat next to him, leaning her head against his shoulder and letting her hand massage his thigh. “You’ve been working a lot lately. Is everything okay?”

Dean felt the weight of work dropping on him again as he remembered, “I heard that Cain is thinking about promoting me, but he wants to test me out first before he does, so he’s kicking my ass with different things all week.”

“Do you know what the promotion is?”

He shook his head and muffled through a mouthful of chicken and now pizza, “No, but I’m guessing it has to do with the new company he wants to open in New York.”

“That means you’ll have to relocate.”

Dean chuckled, “That’s _if_ I take it.”

She raised her eyebrows, “You won’t?”

Not just because he wasn’t ready, but because Cas was in Bellevue, and moving meant not seeing him again. Unless, of course, destiny had its tricks and planned to reunite them somehow, but that was a long shot. “I have to think about it.”

“Oh,” Bela said as she wrapped her arms around Dean’s arm and got comfortable, “I hope you do, I’ve been meaning to open a new law firm, and New York seems like the perfect place to do it. Do you have any idea how much Omega discrimination happens there? Dean, they need me.”

“I know they do.” She smiled down at the beautiful brunette. “But I still need to think about it. Going from Bellevue to New York is a very big change. Not only is the city bigger, but he people are incredibly different. Plus, I’d be very far away from my family.”

“I’m sure they’d be happy that you took a promotion.” 

“Yeah.” She was right. His parents would be ecstatic to hear that he was promoted, in case Cain did mean it about moving him up. John, most of all, would be proud of him, like the moment he introduced Bela to him and saw how good of a Beta she was. 

“Hmm.” Bela cuddled against Dean, bringing the eating Alpha closer, “I bumped into one of your coworkers today and we had coffee. Do you know Castiel?”

Her sudden statement sent chills down his spine. Shit. What did this mean? Did she already know? “What happened?”

“Nothing bad, we just talked and I set him up on a date.”

Dean stopped eating to look at her, “You did what?”

Bela squinted at Dean, clearly suspicious, “I set him up with my brother. They’ll be going to the St. Cloud Gala together as a date. Hopefully they’ll hit it off, they both seriously need it.”

The Alpha gulped, his jealousy sparking in his stomach. Bela’s brother wasn’t a bad guy, he was just kind of weird, in Dean’s opinion. He barely talked, at least to Dean, never showed up to the family gatherings, but somehow kept a close connection with Bela. Tyson Brady wasn’t who he wanted for Cas. “Does Brady know?”

“He knows he’s going on a date; he doesn’t know it’s with Castiel.”

“How does that work?”

“Apparently Brady and Cas have a lengthy history together.”

Her answer did nothing to his confusion or raging envy, “What does that mean?”

Bela sighed and sat up, “Brady used to work for this rich guy like five years ago, who hired him to keep an eye on his omega, who turns out to be Castiel. Time passed and my usually cold older brother, grew a heart for Cas, falling desperately in love with him. Unfortunately, it was one sided but he always kind of suspected that their feelings were mutual in one way or another.”

That was a story of Castiel’s, or Bela’s brother, that he didn’t know about. “Okay?”

“Eventually, Brady’s boss, Castiel’s ex-husband, found out and confronted them the night that Brady agreed to help Cas run away. The man was drunk off his ass and threatened to kill them, but my brother stepped in and stood up for Cas so that he could escape, ending with the guy shooting Brady. He was lucky enough that the Alpha was drunk enough to miss and hit his shoulder.”

“Does Cas…” He stopped for a moment to remind himself that couldn’t be too formal about the Omega around his girlfriend. She was already getting suspicious. “Does Castiel know that Brady is okay?”

 “He doesn’t even know that Brady is alive. Brady mentioned that Cas probably still thinks he’s dead.”

Dean chuckled, “That’s going to be quite the surprise, don’t you think? Besides, how do you even know that it's the same Castiel?”

“Let's be honest, how many people do you know with that name? Sweetheart, there’s nothing better than reuniting two people that clearly loved each other. Happened with us. Remember when we thought that our one-night stand would be the only time we’d see the other? Look at us now! We’ve been dating for years and now we’re engaged!”

The reminder of his engagement made Dean uneasy. “Yeah.”

“You don’t think my brother should go for Cas? I personally think they’d make a great couple…”

It was the other way around, actually, and no, they wouldn’t be a good couple. Sure, Brady was okay, but he was too plain for Cas. He wasn’t going to say that Castiel deserved an Alpha like him, because Dean knew he was no better. “It’s not that…” Dean scratched the back of his head in uneasiness, “Look, from what I know about Cas,” which was plenty, “he’s a shy guy…I don’t think he gets along with a lot of people…this type of shock with Brady, might be a little much for him.”

“I think he needs it, though. Not the shock, of course, but some time with Brady. My brother is just as shy as he is, and you know how long he’s been looking for an Omega. None of his previous relationships worked out, maybe the one good thing that happened to him with Cas might be his journey to finally settling down with a mate.”

Dean grew frustrated and he blurted, “But why with Cas?”

“Why does it matter if it’s with Cas? The date isn’t for you.” Now it was Bela’s turn to be angry. “Are you jealous? Is something going on that you’re not telling me?”

He fucked up. Quick, he had to fix it. “What? No! I’m with you. What makes you think I’d feel something like that?”

“It’s just the way you’ve been reacting since I told you about the blind date.”

“I have you and that’s all I need, okay?”

Bela’s anger seemed to tone down and she leaned in to kiss him, “I love you, Dean.”

Dean bit his lip at her words, “I love you, too.”

**-.-.-.-.-.-**

Dean and Bela had been together for around four years. Their romance was passionate and fun, at first, but it slowly turned into an obligation rather than a relationship. Although he did have feelings for her, he never actually loved her, which was a pity because not only did she help him and his family a lot, but everyone around him seemed to simply adore her. 

He couldn’t blame them, Bela had a great personality that distinguished her from the usually boring Betas, but Dean couldn’t push her to love her in the ways that she loved him. Dean wanted what his parents had, and he couldn’t see it with Bela. 

Dean planned on breaking up with her two years ago, but the tragedy that hit his family prevented him from doing so. When his father had a stroke, all paths pointed to him not making it, but Bela made sure, through her numerous contacts in the medicine field, that a miracle was achieved and John would make it through the impossible to keep watching his sons grow. If it weren’t for her, god knows what Dean would be doing now without his father. 

There wasn’t a day in which Dean wasn’t grateful to Bela for that, and he wanted to be in love with her as an attempt, leading him to propose, but that turned out to be another failed technique.

They laid in bed together, Bela sleeping cuddled against him. 

He wished he could feel something deeper for her instead of falling in love with Castiel. 

Damn it. 

Dean couldn’t keep the Omega out of his thought, even for a while. What was it about those blue eyes that he managed to find love in them instead of Bela’s? Was it the thrill of messing with the forbidden? Or the mystery of who he was?

His heart and mind still couldn’t decide. 

It worsened when his phone vibrated on his nightstand and Dean reached for it to see Castiel’s named plastered on the screen. 

“C-Cas?”

“ _I hate you_.” His heart dropped at the brokenness in the Omega’s voice.

Dean carefully stood from his bed, making sure he wouldn’t disturb the sleeping Bela, setting the bedsheets aside and walking to his bathroom, “Are you alright? It’s past midnight. Is everything okay?” 

“ _Everything’s fine…I just can’t stop thinking about what you did…or what we briefly had_ …”

The was a faint smile playing on his lips, “Me neither. I miss you so much. I can’t eat, I barely manage to sleep, I just want to think about you and how much you mean—”

Castiel interrupted, “ _I didn’t call to hear you say what you’ve probably told Bela every morning_ ,” Dean heard him sniffle, “ _I just wanted you to know that you fucked me up, Dean_.”

“No, Cas, don’t say that to me.”

“ _And what? Let you get away with it? No, Dean, you…you hurt me, and the two times we slept together, you fucking knew but didn’t stop because you thought you could pin it on me. Was it because I was an Omega? Or because I was lonely? How far did you think you’d get before I found out? Worse, before Bela found out_?”

Cas’ words felt like a kick to the stomach, and boy, did Dean know what that felt like, “It was never like that, okay?” He tried to explain himself, “My intention was never to hurt you. I got carried away and I should’ve told you that I was with her the day after. I shouldn’t have allowed myself to kiss you back that night.”

“ _But you didn’t. You kept going until I begged you to knot me. Is that what you wanted_?”

“No!”

“ _Then why the fuck did it have to be me_?!” His voice cracked, “ _Why me, out of all the other Omegas that threw their slick soaked panties at you_?”

“Because I was an idiot. I was thinking with the wrong head. I never intended to hurt you in any way, but I let my needs come before your feelings. I understand you being angry with me, but God, don’t hate me.” Cain’s words kept replaying in his head. He was right, Dean was selfish for only thinking about what he wanted, and not about what was right. 

“ _Why shouldn’t I?_ ”

“Because I want to make this work. I want to make you happy, even if it takes forever, I want to keep trying. You drive me crazy in ways I had never experienced before, not even with her.” Dean breathed in, “It’s silly now, I know, but I just want you to know how much I love—” Dean saw the door opening from his mirror and he turned around to see Bela walk up to him, and wrapping her arms around his waist.  

“Dean, sweetie, who are you talking to?” She purred, “It’s almost one in the morning…”

“Uh, yeah, just…just give me a sec, okay?”

“Come back to bed, it’s getting cold.”

“Let me finish this call first—” He looked at his phone to mute his side of the line, but the screen showed a terminated call instead. Fuck. He could only imagine how much of a mess he had created this time, or how Castiel was reacting to his actions. 

Maybe Castiel did deserve Brady. Sure, he had his opinions on the guy, but he was more than certain that the Alpha would never put Cas through what Dean did. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a little late but I hope i delivered. This is in Dean's POV because I wanted to show his relationship with Bela. Also, one of the plot twists was who Bela's brother was and I hope I did well on that idk I was a little insecure about that hahah. Anyways, please read and comment! The next chapters will continue with the angst but not for long.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

For a week, Dean Winchester and Castiel Novak managed to avoid each other. It wasn’t easy, of course. Sometimes they’d cross ways coming out of the copy room and leave without apologizing, other times they’d get stuck in the lunch line together and struggled with not making eye contact. 

Eventually though, they had to talk, but Cas was hoping that it wouldn’t be that day. He was still hurt about their whole situation that seeing the Alpha again would only make him break down. 

It happened when Cas was giving his coworker Charlie instructions about how to do the financial reports of that day, since the Beta that usually did them was on vacation. Dean approached her cubicle, with a stoic expression planted on his face. The Omega didn’t have to look up to know it was him, his stench was asphyxiating.

“Mr. Novak.” He said gently.

Cas sighed, “Yes?”

“Do you have a moment to talk?”

He shook his head, “I’m a little busy, Mr. Winchester, I think it’s best if we wait for a better time?” He refused to look at him in the eyes, knowing that if he did, he’d immediately pick up on the sadness in his green orbs. 

“You don’t have an option.”

“No?”

Dean started stuttering, “W-well, you do, but this is necessary.”

Castiel finally gave in and chuckled, “Whatever.” He dropped his folder on Charlie’s desk and instructed her to wait for him. 

Cas followed Dean through the busy corridors, past some offices and into the break room. Ah yes, that magical room where Castiel confronted the cheating Alpha and punched him. Twice. Good times. 

The Alpha allowed him to pass first, keeping his chivalry in check, but as soon as the door closed behind them, and a lock was heard, Cas spun around and cut the bullshit act he had to put up while under his presence. “What do you want? Haven’t you done enough?”

“Listen, I just wanted us to talk about what happened that night.”

“You have to be a little more specific.”

“The most recent one.”

He crossed his arms and scoffed, “Oh, you mean the one where your fiancée walked in after you spend most of your time telling me how much you wanted to try it again? I’m not in the mood to be dealing with that…”

“Tough shit, I called you in so we could properly talk about it and that’s what I plan on doing.”

“No, you don’t get a say so on what I want, Dean. I’m not falling for your southern ranch boy charm only so you can step all over me. You know, you don’t realize it, but you act like every knot headed Alpha I’ve met.” Castiel spat at him, his anger fuming through his pores. “I wanted you to be different for the sake of my will, but you fooled me, and Bela.”

Dean reached for Castiel, attempting to grab his arms, but the Omega backed away before he could, “You have no idea what you’ve done to me. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, all I want to do is think about you and your scent. It drives me nuts. I meant it when I said I loved you.”

“No, stop.” He couldn’t do that to him, not during his weakest moments. “You can’t corner me to say you love me when you don’t. You’re only saying that to get your way.”

“It’s not like that. It never was. You mean so much to me, I could never do that you.”

“But you did. You slept with me twice and led me on until your play-pretend fell apart and hurt me when it did. What, did you think I’d feel nothing when I found out about Bela? Dean, you gave me hope only to take it away. Don’t you think that was a little shitty on your behalf?” It was hard for him to say that without completely spilling out every single thing he felt since the day chaos ensued. “Could you just let it go and allow me to live on my own?”

“How do you plan on doing that?”

“Well, for your information, I have a date in less than two weeks. Ironically, your girlfriend set it up.”

“And you couldn’t say no? You know, when you say you want to stay away, you’re not that good at keeping your word.”

“As if you were any better.” Castiel huffed, “Anyways, what does it matter to you what I do with my personal life? Fucking it up wasn’t enough for you, already? Now, you want to have control over who I date while you roll around in the sheets with your girlfriend?”

“No…” Dean hesitated thinking carefully about what he’d say next to the Omega, “Look, I don’t want you to date this other guy because I know him…”

“Oh? Is he a liar like you? A cheater? Will he hurt me? You should tell me so I don’t fall into another trap like I did with you.”

Dean gulped, “You know what? Never mind.” The Alpha looked down, seeming disappointed in something, or like he was holding back. Either or worked. “Enjoy your date. I’m sure it’ll work out. He scored the jackpot with you.”

Cas stopped Dean before he could walk away, “Wait. Do you something about him? His name even? Bela forgot to give it to me, so any type of information would be great.” A certain anger rose within him when Dean refused to cooperate, “If this is because I’m going on a date…”

“It’s not. Enjoy your date. Really, Cas, you deserve it.” He paused, “I want you to know though, that I mean everything I said, I do love you, and I know that despite everything I did, you love me too. Even if it’s a little bit, you feel something for me in return.” The Alpha checked his watch, “I was hoping that we could get something out of this today, bit I guess was too much of me to ask.”

Castiel shook his head, getting ready to say something to Dean, but nothing came out when he opened his mouth and the only thing he was capable of was to watch his ex-love walk away. He thought that by then, he’d be used to that type of situation, but it only hurt more than all the previous times combined.

**-.-.-.-.-.-**

After their talk, Dean finally kept his word and avoided Castiel. He roamed around the office, laughing with the other employees, cracking a few jokes, putting smiley faces on all his emails to make himself seem less intimidating, but he never came near the Omega again. Not even to correct him on some of the errors his final report came with. 

He had to admit, he kind of missed it. 

Of course, he scolded himself for even thinking that, but his pride wasn’t as big to prevent him from [icturing the life he could’ve had if Dean wasn’t engaged. Cas wanted a life with him just like he wanted one with Gadreel before they broke up, but just like that, it didn’t work out. 

At that point, he wasn’t so sure about what he truly felt for Dean, or if it stretched as far as the Alpha had for him. Love was a very strong word and Castiel only remembered saying it a few times to Gadreel. 

The memory was clear, Gadreel was devouring the breakfast that Cas made for him that morning, one of the rare occasions the Omega actually woke up early to cook for someone. While watching his boyfriend stuff his mouth with chocolate chip pancakes and bacon, Cas blurted out, “I love you.”

Gadreel looked at him with wide, shocked eyes before his features softened and a cheeky grin spread across his face, “I love you, too. More than you could ever imagine.” His hand would then reach for Castiel’s chin to pull him into a soft kiss.

He didn’t know that three months later he’d overhear him tell his twin Ezekiel about how he was planning to leave, or that the scars that Cas had no control over would become a boundary between them. 

But at that moment, he couldn’t bring himself down to think about that. He had better stuff to do. Like choosing a suit for his date.

The store he got recommendations for, bordered outside Seattle. It was small, but the suits they had on display were breathtaking that it almost made him forget about the last time he ever had to buy a suit like those, which was for his wedding with Michael. How could he forget his mother’s nagging for getting him a traditional Omega dress when Cas wanted a white suit?

The place was nearly alone, with the other living soul inside having his measurements taken. Before Castile Castiel could come close to have a better look at how delicate the Betas surrounding him were, an Alpha woman stood in front of him.

“Can I help you with anything?” Her nametag read Amara. 

“Yes, I’m looking to buy for a gala.”

The woman scented him, doing a terrible job at being discreet about it, “Hmm,” She hummed as her eyes roamed Castiel’s physique, “There’s an Omega dress shop across the street, if you’re interested.”

Ugh. How obnoxious. “I want a suit.”

She smirked and oh, how Cas wished he could slap it off her face, “For your Alpha boyfriend, I’m assuming.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know this was still the nineteen-fifties.”

“It isn’t.”

“Okay, then there shouldn’t be a problem selling me a suit.”

Amara sighed. “Fine. Would you like it customized or would you rather have a pick of the displays?”

“I’ll take my time looking around. Thank you.”

The Alpha rolled her eyes and walked away, disappearing to a room in the back. When they recommended the store, they forgot to mention the rude, classist workers. Had he known, and he wouldn’t have made the time to come in the first place. 

It’s not like the choices were impressive either. The ones on display, yes. The ones inside, no. They were a bit plain for his taste, but then again he wasn’t going for flashy in order to impress his date. 

He wondered about the type of person Bela’s brother would be like. She said he was shy, o he assumed that getting through him would be like a tough shell, but nothing he couldn’t get past. Gadreel was the same way and he held a lengthy relationship with him.

If he was lucky, the guy wouldn’t be like his ex-lovers and was as honest as Bela. He hated the thought of repeating the painful process and another failed relationship would already be too much for his heart to contain. 

Cas wasn’t the type to fantasize about the perfect, mated life, but he was nearing his thirties and hope was the only thing he could cling to, and with every moment and every Alpha that disappointed him, that seemed less reliable to grip on.

The Omega spent around thirty minutes looking through a variety of different brands, none of them appealing his taste, and he was afraid of having to use his old, typical suit. Not that he minded, but as much as he hated to admit, he did want to low-key leave an impact on is date. Even if it didn’t work out. He was desperate to be memorable for a guy whose name he didn’t know. 

“Are you sure you don’t want it custom made?” Amara watched him from a distance, seeing how nothing came close to what Castiel wanted and clearly upsetting her. 

“I’m sure I can find something.” He muttered, eyeing the different colors of ties they had. One in particular, a yellow one with silver stripes caught his attention the most, caught his interest and he grabbed it, setting it aside and preparing for another search of suits that would match it nicely. 

Cas had some candidates, but one in particular was calling out for him. It wasn’t showing off like the others, instead it was hanging on a rack behind a mannequin. It was a simple, but the cufflinks were shaped to resemble angel wings. The Omega didn’t know if that was the main reason behind it, but he took it as his final choice after comparing it with the gold tie. Coincidentally, the measurements were oddly close to his body type. It was as if he and the suit were meant to be. 

“I’ll be taking this one.” He informed Alpha Amara, and she incredulously scoffed his way when she saw the decision he went with. 

“Can you afford it?”

Shit. He forgot that money would be required to get a new suit. Cas knew he had money on different cards but he wasn’t sure if they would all complete for him to buy it, plus he still had bills to pay. 

“How much is it?”

“Four hundred.”

“Overall?”

“Plus twenty-five for the tie.”

“Why so much?”

“The materials are from Egypt.”

Cas chuckled, “That still doesn’t make up for most of it.” He knew because his mother loved imported goods, and not even their living room carpet from Russia was that expensive. 

Amara lifted an eyebrow, “You want it or not?”

“Um.” He pulled out his wallet, looking through his different credit cards and stopping at a blue one he through he’d never see again. The one with his college funds that he never finished because Michael pulled him out of college before he could get his Masters in Mathematics. “Yes, I do.”

“Will you be paying with cash or credit.”

“Credit.” He handed the card over and waited for her to return with a copy of his receipt. At least he was done buying of the stupid date. All he had to do now was wait until the day came along and hope that all the money he spent would be worth it. 

Cas kept telling himself not to worry about his date throughout his drive home, making it longer than what it truly was. He didn’t know what he was worried about more. If the guy was as good as Bela put him, or Dean’s reaction when he saw him with someone else. Although he was more than sure it’d be perfect. 

All he wanted to do for the rest of that afternoon was to sleep it off and hopefully, as the day neared, his anxiety would fade. The date perhaps wouldn’t be as bad as his brain was making it out to be. 

As he careful put away his outrageously expensive purchase in his closet, he heard a sound coming from his kitchen. Not too loud, but it was distinctive enough to pick up, like the dropping of a spoon. 

It was probably his neighbor’s cat sneaking into his apartment through the open window again, which really wasn’t much of a problem since it meant having to drop off the feline at the freakishly attractive Alpha’s place. 

But what he wasn’t expecting was that when he stepped into his living room to walk in on the cat sleeping on his floor again, he’d have to hear the voice he spent so long to forget. The same one that humiliated him, the one that tortured him in more than one way. 

“You’re looking better than last time.” He spoke. 

Castiel’s blue eyes immediately watered as he spun around to face the blond, poisonous green eyed man that sat cross legged on his couch, chewing on an apple. “ _Michael_?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I know this is late, but my depression consumed me for a week where I forgot to do a lot of things. Eventually, I managed to pull this out and I hope y'all enjoy! Also, I got a new pup and he's my perfect son.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

The air in his apartment stank of Michael. 

Salted Caramel. 

Cas wanted to vomit, he couldn’t even look at him, but he forced himself to so that his fear wouldn’t reflect and give the Alpha the satisfaction. 

Michael had upgraded his outfits and cut his hair since the last time he saw him. His appearance, though, had remained sloppy yet handsome. “You’ve gained body muscle.” Those aqua-green eyes scanned him, as if they were searching for a way to attack.

“How did you get in here?” Castiel managed through the lump stuck in his throat. 

“There’s a lot of things you can find on the internet…” He took another bite out of his apple. “Picking a lock turned out to be a lot simpler than I expected. You, on the other hand…you really know how to hide in the suburbs. It’s impressive. Didn’t picture you as the type.”

Castiel couldn’t care less, despite having asked. His mind was flowing with all the outcomes of everything that could go wrong in the following minutes. He thought about his escape, the cities he could run off to, and the jobs he could apply for. “How’d you find me?”

“I have eyes and ears everywhere, Cassie. You forget my multiple contacts. Plus, it’s not like you were completely careful either. Sure, you stayed out of my radar for years, but you appeared every so often and I used the tiniest of clues to pinpoint your location. Leading me here.” Michael gestured at Castiel’s apartment. “It’s a comfy place you got here, actually. A lot less from what I could give you, but certainly comfy.” 

“You remember I have a restraining order against you?” Cas crossed his arms, feeling vulnerable the moment the Alpha stood up to throw away his snack. Yes, he could’ve easily attacked, but his body was frozen. 

Michael chuckled as he spun around to face him, “Do you have any idea what a judge is willing to do for fifty grand? A lot apparently, and that includes you restraining order, so really all you have now is simple piece of paper.”

His anger was rising, reminding him that he had power to overcome him, to make him feel what he felt years ago if not worse. Cas took steps towards Michael, gripping his black coat by the collar, resisting the urge to press his hands against his skin and choke him, and forcing him up from his couch. “What do you want from me? Everything I had and who I was as a person, you took from me and stepped on it until you were satisfied. Leaving me with nothing.”

“Oooh, you’ve gotten yourself a little fight. That’s good. It could’ve come in handy all those times I had my fun with you.” A devious grin spread across his face, his sharp canines exposing, the Omega recapped all the times they were covered in his blood. 

Cas’ eyes widened, about to unleash his trail of tears at the grim reminder, but his dignity held him back and surged him to push Michael against the wall, slamming his forearm against his chest. “You can no longer control me.”

He smirked, “You wanna test that?”

“What else could you want from me, Michael? Damaging me wasn’t enough?”

“None of that would’ve happened if you had just been a good, obedient Omega. No, you wanted to stick to your shitty mindset and do your own thing, so I did mine.” He stayed quiet for a moment, “Anyways, if I’m here it’s to say that I want you back. Long shot, I know, but I still had to see you. You’re my first love, and if you think I’m going to let you go without a fight, you’re wrong.” 

“You raped me.”

“I know.”

“You think sweet talking me if going to change anything?”

Michael nodded, his golden hair glowing under the dim light of Cas’ living room, “You have that weakness.” 

“It’s not a weakness.” Castiel said vehemently through his teeth. “What you did is inexcusable and nothing you can say or do will change my feelings towards you.”

“Oh, please, I’ve done worse things…”

Cas held back his urge to punch him again. The decency of this man… He knew that if he gave in to his anger, Michael would be getting what he wanted by pushing the omega past his limit to the point of no return. He wanted to break again to have the weakest side of him out again. 

“You’re not ready to cry yet, are you?”

He wanted to. Every fiber of his being was telling him to do so, but Castiel was aware of his strength and how much more he was capable of putting up with before giving up. “Why don’t you just go? I’m not going with you anywhere. I’ve built a life here.”

“One that I could easily replace. You really have no idea how quickly money can do that.”

“No. You can’t buy me.”

“That’s not what your parents seemed to think. Especially your mother.”

His mother was a pig. She didn’t care about Castiel’s safety or who she was giving him away to, even after it was too late. The damage happened and she still wouldn’t bat an eye his way to make it stop. Cas’ father was a little different. He always tried to comfort him through the bad times and was the only one that realized the pain his Omega son was going through. 

“Don’t bring up my family again.”

“Or what? You’ll hurt me? Sugar, you touch one hair on me in any wrong way and I’ll do worse things to you that’ll make our marriage seem like the sweetest of dreams.” Michael smiled, “You wanna test how far I can go?”

Castiel backed away slowly, not because he was afraid, which he kind of was, but because he believed him. Michael had always been a man of his word, as twisted as it seemed, and when he threatened to hurt him in worse ways, he kept himself from pushing it. 

“You seriously need to learn to never underestimate me. When I say money can buy a lot of thing, I mean it. From that car you always wanted, to your ex-boyfriend…It’s all a matter of knowing how to pull the strings—”

Wait…what? “My ex-boyfriend?”

“Cassie, honey, you know how I feel about interruptions.”

“Fuck your interruptions, what do you mean by my ex-boyfriend?”

“Ugh, gosh, I keep forgetting his name…” He snapped his fingers and wrinkled his nose, attempting to remember, “Gadreel? Whatever, that guy? He was pretty easy to get rid of, his weakness was pretty obvious. Unfortunately, it wasn’t you.”

Castiel clenched his fist, keeping himself from punching the blond Alpha in front of him. “What did you do?” And how had he not noticed? Had his own pride gotten in the way to blind him? 

“Nothing drastic. I just invited him for a coffee and offered him a pretty thick sum of money if only he left you.”

With every word he said, memories of Gadreel’s smile, his way of speaking, his touches, all the nights they spent together came flooding back into his brain. Had he really been that naïve to trade in their love for money? Had it meant so little? “He wouldn’t…” It all made sense…

Michael walked past Castiel to sit on the couch again, “Did you know his father was sick? Lung cancer, I believe. I honestly don’t remember.”

“What?”

“His father.”

Cas stayed quiet. Suddenly, an imaginary bucket of ice water hit him. The puzzle pieces were connecting.

“I told him I’d pay for his father’s treatment if he left you. Expensive too, so it’s not like he could turn away from it, either.” He said, without a hint of sensitivity. Castiel had never hated anyone as much as him. He never wanted to kill anyone as badly either. “It’s not like he wanted to, he did care for you. Daddy came first, and you second, so obviously he took the money, but not after a pathetic amount of time begging for another way. He loved you, can you believe that?” 

Yes, he could. He saw it in his grey eyes every morning when they woke up together, with every touch and kiss. Castiel reflected the same thing for him. They could’ve been mates had Michael not gotten in the way, apparently. 

“Money got the best of him, and he agreed to leave. I can only guess what happened after that.” He laughed. “Tell me, Cassie? How did he do it? Did he simply break up with you? Or did he take his time to let it kill you?”

Gadreel’s looks changed. While they were having sex one night, the Alpha pushed him away and told him he couldn’t look at him. Castiel was confused at first, until Gadreel gestured at his scars. The Omega wanted to be angry at him, but he couldn’t. He loved him so much that all he wanted to do was to understand where he was coming from. 

He wanted to break up with Cas the night the Omega walked out of their apartment. Castiel’s pride was not going to let him have it, so he left and only left a note behind that said ‘Goodbye’.

When he did that, he strictly told himself to never love another Alpha like that. 

Until Dean Winchester showed up.

“By the looks of it, he took his time. I’m guessing it hurt. Serves you well. You needed to know what I felt when you abandoned me.”

“You raped me.” It hurt him to have to repeat himself. “Is that not enough reason for me to leave? Did you expect me to stay by your side and have me your way? Not only did you ruin my life then, but you decided to follow me around like a bitter five-year-old to stomp on it further.”

“What? Did you really see a future with a self-defense teacher?”

“I loved him. Something I couldn’t do with you.” 

“Please. With a salary like his, he would never be able to provide for you.”

And it became the first moment that Castiel ever cursed at his impulse, because the words that he said after Michael, were ones he’d come to regret, “Well, it doesn’t matter. I’ve found someone else.”

Michael lifted an elegant eyebrow, “Oh yeah? What’s their name?”

“That’s none of your business.”

“It is if it was important enough for you to bring up.” Michael’s eyes burned holes into Castiel’s skull, waiting on his answer. Deep down, Cas knew how strong he could be against his ex, but at that moment, he felt exposed and weak, like the moment they met. 

“I met him recently. I think I love him.” That was half a lie.

“How’d you meet?”

“Office party.”

“Why don’t you invite him over? I’d love to have a chat with him; wanna test out how much he’s willing to give to leave you.” 

Actually, that wasn’t a bad idea. Maybe Dean could protect him, play along with their dating game, and get Michael to leave him alone. Cas could only hope, but it was worth a shot. The last person he wanted to go to for help was Dean, but his options kept running low, so he had to work with what he had. 

He pulled his cellphone from his pocket and typed with shaking hands:

_**Dean, please come to my apartment, I need you. It’s an emergency. Please. -C** _

He was hopeful that Dean wouldn’t take his sweet ass time to get there. The longer he stayed alone with Michael, the more anxious he became. The Alpha’s scent was toxic to his lungs, he wanted to choke and die on the spot if it meant being away from him. 

“What should we do while your boyfriend gets here. As your guest, it’s your job to keep me entertained, right?” Cas forgot how quick Michael was when wanted to, when he was sober. 

The Alpha pinned Castiel against the wall, hands above his head, and pressed his body against the Omega’s smaller one. Cas attempted to fight him, to resist his moves, and put everything that Gadreel taught him to the test, but his body became fragile, willing to take whatever came his way like the old times. 

“You know, despite everything your boyfriend taught you, you still weaken under my touch. It’s quite amusing, I must say, but I was expecting tonight to be memorable. I wanted you to fight me, to beg me to stop while you pushed me away like you used to. I care about you, Cassie, and I would never tell, but I missed you a lot. Even cried the night you left. Your departure broke me enough to stop drinking.” His hands reached for Castiel’s waist and pressed him closer, “Now I have you back, and boy, am I going to savor this moment like the first time.” 

Cas whimpered. Why did everything have to mess up? He was doing fine, he was happy, and now it was all going to hell in one night? Fucking hell...

“Cry for me, Cas.” Michael purred against his neck, licking one of the multiple scars that belonged to him, “Cry for me like you did that night and I promise to be gentle and to clean you up by the time your boyfriend gets here.”

“N-no.” Cas sobbed gently, holding back the cascade of tears that built up, “P-p-please don’t d-do this t-to m-me.”

Everything Gadreel taught him was useless. His arms were too weak when they tried to push the Alpha away, and his legs wobbly when they tried to knee him. The reason he trained for this was Michael, and now he couldn’t use it against him. 

Pathetic. 

“There it is. C’mon, baby do it again. Beg for me not to hurt you.” Michael yanked one of Castiel’s legs up, wrapped it around his thighs to have better access and grind the Omega, “It’s still just as delicious.”

“M-Michael, please, s-stop—” He was cut short when the Alpha shoved his tongue into the Omega’s mouth, one hand digging into his hair to hold his head into place. 

Cas’ stomach twisted in disgust. The Omega never thought about the most appropriate moment to kill himself and get this over with. He couldn’t do it. He didn’t want to fall back into the pile he ran away from, but the only thing he could do in that agonizing moment, was cry his eyes out and wait for everything to be over. 

He pushed, he fought with the little strength that refused to give up, but nothing worked. In the time since their separation, Michael grew strong. Or perhaps, Cas was weaker?

“You love me, Cas.” He breathed against his ear, “I know you love me.”

“I never did.”

“That’s not true. Since we were kids, you always had a thing for me. You should’ve been grateful I chose you. I could’ve had anyone, but I only wanted you.” His fingers grazed the buttons of Castiel’s shirt, “I had never wanted anyone,” He tugged the materials apart, his breathing getting harder, “as much as I want you.” 

“Stop, please.” Castiel cried. 

Michael reached for Castiel’s pants, working his way through the zipper, “Know that, if you can’t be mine, you’ll never be anyone’s. You’re my property, and I’ll have you as such.” He was about to force another kiss onto Castiel, but the doorbell interrupted them, and Michael let go of the Omega faster than when he grabbed him. “I’ll answer. You stay here.”

The Alpha walked away, disappearing to open the door, and when he was out of sight, Cas dropped to his knees, covering himself with his arms. He felt exposed, so unprotected. If it was Dean at the door, he hoped, for the first time since they met, that he could save him. 

“Can I help you?”

“Who are you?”

“Doesn’t matter, what do you want?”

“I’m here for Castiel.”

Michael chuckled, “Are you his boyfriend?”

“I’m his friend.” Fuck up. 

“He’s not here.”

Dean stayed silent, Cas could hear his loud sniffing, “That’s not true. Hey, who the fuck are you and what did you do to him?”

“I didn’t do anything he didn’t like.”

Dean paused again, the Omega could feel his rising frustration, “Move away from the door, pal.”

The room was still for a moment, before the shuffling of feet got louder, and whatever Dean was carrying dropped to the floor as he got his first sight of Castiel. Cas couldn’t look at him, he felt dirty, contagious even, but when Dean’s arms wrapped around him, he couldn’t help himself. “Dean.” He mumbled.

“Cas, it’s okay. It’s okay, baby, I got you.”

“Aw.” Michael ruined the moment, “How cute. Are you sure you’re not together?”

“Back off.” Dean warned, “You touch him again, and I’ll end you.”

Michael’s eyes went wide, “Do you have any idea what could happen to you if you do that?” A devious smirk appeared, “I could fuck you up for even looking at me in any wrong way.”

Dean stood up, keeping Castiel behind him. “I don’t care. I’ll do anything to keep him safe. Leave before this gets ugly.” He turned around and checked on the Omega. Cas was a mess. He knew Dean had never seen him that way. 

“Why don’t you make me, big boy?” Michael had a bigger mouth than he had of a physique, so tempting Dean probably wasn’t the best idea. If he wanted to, Dean could tear him apart, but he knew that the Alpha wasn’t in it for the violence. Cas knew he only wanted him safe. 

“I could easily do it, but I prefer to keep this peaceful. It’s best if you leave things how they are. It’ll be convenient for you.”

Michael glanced at the delicate Castiel, smiling at the outcome of his presence. He didn’t say anything, just backed away like Dean instructed and headed to the door. 

When he heard it shut, Cas finally gave himself the freedom to cry out and sob into his hands. He felt so dirty, so used, like he never left that horrible marriage he had been trapped in. Cas only wanted to scrape off skin to feel better about himself, but he couldn’t, he was already broken enough to show it in front of Dean. 

“Hey.” Dean kneeled in front of him, cupping his face on his hands, “I’m here for you.”

Cas buried his face on Dean’s neck, “Don’t let go.”

“I won’t, I promise.”

 

**-.-.-.-.-.-**

**(Boyd Holbrook as Michael)**

** **

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if it's late. It's been a rough past weeks that i couldn't concentrate on making an update. 
> 
> It hurt me to write this chapter for the sake of Cas, especially since 1) the sensitive topic I had to cover and 2) I didn't want to picture Boyd Holbrook as Michael. It was painful :'( 
> 
> Anyways, the next chapter is sort of gonna be a part two of this, I really want to cover the history between Michael/Cas, Brady/Cas, and Gadreel/Cas, as well the patching relationship between destiel. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed and please tell me what you think!


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

Cas felt dirty, like his skin was covered in rotten materials and maggots. He wanted to rip it off, if he could, but Dean, who stood by his side guiding him to the shower, wouldn’t let him.

Dean remained quiet, he knew he was in no position to say anything but Cas kind of wanted to hear his soothing voice telling him that he’d be alright.

“Thank you.” Cas partly mumbled. It was barely audible for anyone to hear, but Dean picked up on it.

“It’s no problem. You know that.” He assured.

“How did you show up so quickly?”

“I was nearby.”

Cas shook his head, “I’m gonna need a longer answer than that.”

“My brother’s in town and his favorite restaurant was around the corner.”

The Omega lifted an eyebrow, “And you abandoned him to see me?”

“You said it was an emergency.” Dean pushed the door open of the bathroom and followed Castiel inside, “When you sent a text like that, I could only assume the worse. My mind immediately blanked and next thing I knew, I was telling my brother I had to go. He understood though, so I think that makes me feel less shitty about walking out on him.”

“He came to visit you; you shouldn’t have left.”

“He told me he’d wait for me at my place so, it’s cool.”

With a sigh, Castiel replied, “You still shouldn’t have left.” It was a bittersweet sensation pooling in his stomach. Dean left his family for him, but he shouldn’t have. Had he known, and Cas wouldn’t have allowed it.

“Get in the shower, Cas.”

“I need you out of the bathroom, then.”

Dean cleared his throat in realization, “Right.” He nodded, “I’ll be in the living room. If you need anything just call for me, okay?”

“Okay.” He agreed and watched as Dean cautiously stepped out of the restroom, making sure the Alpha didn’t trip on his feet because he refused to unglue his green eyes from Castiel’s blue ones.

Now he was alone.

The feeling of Michael still lingering against his skin creeped up on him. It seemed as if insects were crawling up his arms and chest. It brought tears to this eyes. How did he allow himself to weaken in front of the man that destroyed him?

He trained so much to be where he was, to be strong, but even the slightest of touch coming from him threw him off guard. The moment he felt him, his whole body numbed and allowed itself to take in the worst that was yet to come.

Slowly, he began to undress, waiting for the shower water to heat up enough that it’d make him feel like everything of Michael could boil away.

All the marks engraved into his skin, seemed brighter, fresher, when he saw them in the mirror again. It was something he thought he’d never experience again, yet there he was. He couldn’t remember the last time his body looked normal.

The Omega stepped into the shower, letting the water softly hit his skin, making him feel like everything could disappear with a water pressure that was just right. He sat on the tub, allowing himself to be sheltered by the cascade.

His brain told him that it’d all be okay if he just thought about something different, like how much worse the night could’ve gone if Dean hadn’t showed, but it always ended with Michael and the years of misery that he went through during their ‘marriage’.

Before he knew it, he had tears rolling down his cheeks but quickly wiped them when he heard a soft knock against the door.

It slightly opened and Dean’s voice followed, “Hey, man, you sure you’re okay in there?”

“Yeah. Go away.”

There was a slight hesitance coming from the other side of the curtain, “You do realize I can smell it when you’re in distress, right?”

“Then why did you ask?”

“To see if you’d lie.”

Cas scoffed, “Just go, Dean.”

The door shut and the Alpha sighed, “Not until you talk to me properly.”

He shook his head, “I really don’t want to. Leave me alone, please.” To his misfortune, Dean was stubborn, and he opened the shower curtain to reveal the wide-eyed Omega looking back at him with surprise. “Dude!” Cas tried to cover himself, “What the hell!”

“You need me.”

“I don’t.” And he meant it at first, but then his nose caught on to his scent and it made him realize that maybe he did. It was strong yet comforting.

Dean caught on to his staring before he started undressing. Castiel tried not to look at him, even though it wouldn’t be the first time he saw him naked, but that stage was already beyond them and, as much as his consciousness fought him for it, he did not want to repeat it.

“Move over.”

Cas could’ve argued over it, calling Dean all different types of insulting names, but he did need him. Despite his pride, he was still an Omega craving the comfort of an Alpha.

He scooted a little, the water uncovering his face and massaging his back, and Dean stepped in behind him, closed the curtains and sat down.

There was a distance between them, like an unmade bond that just found the missing pieces to complete the puzzle, it was just a matter of figuring out what went where and how.

“Sit back.” He said. Dean still smelt deliciously like chocolate and coffee, as well as some tints of pinewood, that Cas closed his eyes and leaned against him on command. The Alpha was warm, probably a little too much that it was distracting. “I’m gonna need you to breathe in…” Dean instructed, he mouth next to Cas’ ear, “And breathe out.”

He was doubting his motives to help him, but Cas knew he needed this, or rather him, so he followed the instructions. He was still a little shaken, but after doing as he was told, he relaxed little by little.

“You definitely didn’t have to do this.”

“You needed me.”

“I didn’t.”

 Dean chuckled, “Right. Is that why you’re so calm now?”

“I’m not calm enough. I keep thinking about how much worse things could’ve been.” About how Michael could’ve taken advantage of him and how he would’ve marked him again to make sure Cas knew who he belonged to.

A strong arm snaked around the Omega’s waist to press him closer, “You’re lucky it didn’t. I don’t know how I would’ve handled it if they did.”

“I can’t believe my parents thought he was good.”

“What did they see in him that blinded them so deeply.”

“Wish I knew. The day I presented, my mother thought she had complete control of my life and just threw me at him. I was eighteen.” It felt like it happened so little ago, “My father was against it, he didn’t trust Michael, but my mother and her family had bigger power over him so they forced him to back down.”

Dean’s nose brushed against Castiel’s shoulder, “I’m sorry about that.”

“It’s okay. It already happened.”

“It’s not okay. You were a kid who got his life ruined.”

“But now I’m here. With you.” He paused, “I mean, you’re not the best of examples, but you’re an improvement from him.”

The Alpha laughed, “I’m more than sure that’s not supposed to be a compliment, but I’ll take it.” He could feel Dean smiling behind him, “I know this is the last thing you wanted from me, but I was incredibly worried and I didn’t want you to suffer alone.”

“Thank you for worrying, though. Not many would have.” He admitted, not because they wouldn’t want to, no Alpha can resist the scent of a stressed-out Omega, but because wouldn’t let them and they immediately took that as a pass to go.

“You know I’ll always be there when you need me.” Unexpectedly, Dean planted a kiss on Cas’ shoulder, “No matter what.”

Cas closed his eyes and sighed. He enjoyed it when Dean did that. He’d never been approached by an Alpha with a delicacy as untainted as his. It was a newfound feeling, one that he was enjoying too much when he shouldn’t have.

“Why are you so good to me, Dean? What was so special about me that you’re here now?”

Dean smiled and breathed in Cas’ aroma, “Where do I even begin?”

“Anywhere. Act as if our lives hadn’t fucked up enough to build the wall that settles between us and keeps us apart?” Sounding dramatic was his specialty, he realized, but with Dean, it felt natural.

“I remember it like it was yesterday.” He started, “You walked into Cain’s office after keeping you waiting for over an hour. Many would’ve walked away, but you were one of the few that stayed. You stood there, confident and radiant, completely ignoring me, even though I was the main reason you were being kept waiting for so long. By then, most would’ve lost their confidence, but you…were impressive and took my breath away. You were a mystery from the start, and have kept me guessing since. I think that’s what made me fall.”

A slight smile played at his lips, “That easy, huh?”

“Well, no, it took some time, but I think the moment where I truly fell, was when you kissed me the night of the office party.”

Wow, that quickly?

“Why?”

“I don’t think I’ve ever tasted lips as sweet as yours.” Dean’s hand caressed Cas’s waist, “Or even seen a creature as beautiful as you.”

“You’re getting a little touchy there.” Cas warned but he couldn’t bring himself down to ask him to stop. It made him forget Michael for the time being.

“Sorry.” The Alpha retracted his hand and continued, “Anyways, ever since then, I’ve been hopelessly in love with you.”

“Love is a strong word.” So, damaging too that it could throw the strongest of souls into a seemingly eternal misery. Gadreel broke his, and he was afraid that Dean would be next. “Using it as freely as you do could harm someone.” It harmed him before.

“I mean it.”

“Don’t play with me like that.”

“I’m not!”

Cas sighed again, “It’s just…so hard to believe that you…of all people, _you_ …had to fall in love with me…”

“It’s not something I can explain, and it’s not lie.” Dean buried his nose into Cas’ wet hair, “God, you smell like heaven.”

And to Castiel, Dean was the same. His odor calmed him like no other Alpha before. Not even Gadreel, and Cas claimed to love the guy, but now? That feeling seemed so small in comparison to what he had with Dean at that moment.

The Omega wanted to wrap his arms around him, allowing the water to cover them both, and kiss him until the last piece of sanity left his body, but he couldn’t out of respect to himself and the woman Dean belonged to.

“I think we should stop.” Cas blurted.

“You’re feeling better?”

He shook his head and gulped, the lump in his throat feeling heavier than what he expected, “No, I mean…with you and I.”

“Cas…”

“No, Dean…what you and I have is a ticking time bomb. Your girlfriend and I are friends, and I’d hate for her to find out that you and I slept together…or that we’re even like this…” He bit his lip, “I do care about you a lot, but this thing, whatever it is, is something I don’t need. I don’t want either of us to get hurt over a forbidden love.”

“I could end it but—”

“So, why don’t you? Why do I have to watch you from the sidelines as you walk away with her after you’re with me? Do you think that’s fair for me? For her?” It hurt him to say it, but the longer he kept it inside, the harder it would’ve become in the future.

“I love you.”

“End things with Bela, then. Stop hurting us.”

“I never intended for things to go this way. I thought it was her who I wanted to develop my life with, who I wanted to start a family, but then I met you, and it was like the world stopped so that I could focus on you. I wish ending things with her were as easy as it is to say it but it isn’t. It never has been.”

Cas stayed quiet. Not because he didn’t have anything to say, boy, did he have plenty, but because he couldn’t. There was no winning side to this. If Dean ended things with Bela to be with him, what will happen when she finds out about it? And the guilt that would consume him for taking away the Alpha of a Beta who was his friend? What if Dean chose to stay with her? What would become of Cas then? Would he remain as the Other Omega?

“I think it’s time for us to get out.” Dean mumbled. “Are you feeling better?”

“Yes.” Only a little bit.

“You sure?”

“I am.”

They stood up, Dean keeping his eyes on Cas as he reached for a towel and wrapped it around his shoulders. He never noticed how green they were until he saw them enlighten under his presence.

If only things had been different between them. Had the world not fucked with them at such an early stage, and maybe they’d be together then. But it was a silly dream Castiel could simply hope for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter was super late. Things have not been easy on me regarding my so-called love life, so because of it, I had to take a break to work on myself among other things. Hopefully updates will return to normal. I hope you liked this chapter and please, please tell me what you thought about it. I was a little iffy about it, but maybe that's just me.


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